College Placement Disappointment from Big 3 Grads?

[Anonymous]

As the parent of a high school student at a "Big 3" school, I would agree that college counselors at these schools cultivate relationships with admissions officers at many colleges and universities. Further, I would agree that with a significantly smaller caseload of students than the counselors at public schools, private school counselors can get to know the students better and thus, are often able to provide more detailed guidance about the appplication process. However, I would strongly caution parents to discount claims that college counselors at the "Big 3" or at any private schools can magically get a kid into any school with a phone call that explains away poor grades or SAT scores or lacklustre recommendation letters. Nor can these counselors be expected to change the basic fact that the admissions process, particularly at the most competitive schools, has become a daunting numbers game, even for students with strong academic records and sports or other activities. Unless your child is a recruited athlete in a sport where there are few candidates (e.g., rowing or fencing) or has raised a considerable sum of money for a charity (e.g., orphans in Haiti or AIDS sufferers in Africa), you cannot count on your child getting into one of these schools. As for OP's post, it is surprising to me that you were surprised by this development. For the most part, parents and kids at my child's school know this. For our own part, we knew this going in and nonetheless wanted our child to have the rich education he's getting at his school. It will prepare him to do well and take advantage of all the opportunities offered to him at whichever college or university he attends. As graduates of an Ivy Leage school and of a top, non-Ivy school, we both have many former classmates who were not prepared to do so. Going to an Ivy League or comparable school is not a golden ticket to professional or personal success.

[Anonymous]

Not to sound trite, but getting into a really good school (both high school and university) is not nearly as important as doing well once you get there ... that is, choosing a school that is a good match for child's abilities and interests. Otherwise, prestige only benefits the parents and then for only a short time ... it is about the kids, right?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:As the parent of a high school student at a "Big 3" school, I would agree that college counselors at these schools cultivate relationships with admissions officers at many colleges and universities. Further, I would agree that with a significantly smaller caseload of students than the counselors at public schools, private school counselors can get to know the students better and thus, are often able to provide more detailed guidance about the appplication process. However, I would strongly caution parents to discount claims that college counselors at the "Big 3" or at any private schools can magically get a kid into any school with a phone call that explains away poor grades or SAT scores or lacklustre recommendation letters. Nor can these counselors be expected to change the basic fact that the admissions process, particularly at the most competitive schools, has become a daunting numbers game, even for students with strong academic records and sports or other activities.

I agree with this, and didn't mean to imply with my post that admissions counselors can magically make problems disappear. I should have emphasized my only point, which is that they may have a sense of which colleges are interested, or not, in certain kids before the letters go out.

[Anonymous]

college counselors, not admissions counselors. Multitasking....

[Anonymous]

Does anyone know of any rowing clubs or opportunities for kids? My DS loves to watch the "big kids" row on the Potomac and is now obsessed with taking lessons...

[Anonymous]

Check out Thompson's Boat House on the Potomac--they may have some summer programs.

[Anonymous]

I agree that the privates probably have great admissions counselors, and some parents are paying for this. Our kids did private for elementary, but at MS we turned down a so-called "top 3" for MCPS magnets. The kids are getting that "rich" education we wanted, and would have done private for in the absence of the magnets.

But ... now that the oldest is in high school, I find that the guidance counselor doesn't return my calls until I leave 2 or 3 voicemail and paper messages with the counselor's admin. I think this particular counselor has about 300 kids in all four grades. (And before I get jumped on, let me clarify that I was calling about things like proper class placement, not college planning for my freshman kid.) And when I asked the question, "if my kid does class X in the 1st semester, is the same class available in a different timeslot in the 2nd semester when DC's schedule changes because of the magnet classes?" I got the following answer: "if we start thinking that far ahead we are all doomed!" Thanks for the help!!

I also doubt she could pick my kid out of a line-up, for the purposes of selling DC to a college admissions officer.

So I'm pretty doubtful about getting any college admissions help from this particular public HS counselor.

[Anonymous]

I am a high school counselor in MCPS. My caseload is 300 students. If one or several of my students are having serious problems that require major intervention at any given time, that does distract from my ability to attend to the needs of those who are "doing fine." This is incredibly frustrating, but please know that we are working overtime to a.) make sound college recommendations b.) write standout recommendations c.) advocate on our students' behalf and d.) get to know each and every one of our students. That said, MCPS counselors have never had any training, either in graduate school or through the County, in college admissions. Some of us have developed expertise over time, but we are not college counselors. Our graduate coursework covered a wide range of clinical topics, but not a single graduate school in this area teaches its future school counselors to advise on colleges. Parents should be aware of this and plan for outside help if this is a concern. Still, I have been incredibly impressed with my fellow counselors' willingness and ability to guide students on college choices, both in terms of choosing the best high school courses and navigating the admissions process. I do agree that counselor caseloads in the public schools are ridiculous--and in this economic climate, I imagine that things will get worse.

[Anonymous]

I was an honor student in high school, straight As, AP classes. From public school in MCPS. Got the Governors tuition scholarship or whatever it was for National Merit Scholars. Had to have some slight additional scheduling accommodations to work during college (was self supporting then with no parental help). UMD was the worst at trying to help me at all. They told me I had to skip UMCP (which had a major I really wanted) and switch to UMUC (night and international school). This was many years ago and I still remember that Dean I spoke with about this issue .. in person ... to no avail. I was young, on my own, just trying to make my way, and he could not have cared less. So I did it - went to UMUC, decided to take as many "test for credit", seminar, etc. courses I could . Finished early, summa, and never looked back. Got the better education in grad school. But it wasn't the same college experience even though , back then even, I thought that I was EXACTLY the kind of kid the state university should exist to help - clearly UMD still doesn't think so. But to OP, if your kid really wants UMD, go in through UMUC and then transfer. They probably even have shared course offerings by now.

[Anonymous]

OK, I admit I'm new here. Who are the Big 3?

[Anonymous]

If you are not joking (and it's okay if you are--good one), see the sticky at the top of the forum on this very question. But bring your Geiger counter--people go nuclear on this subject.

[Anonymous]

Sidwell, STA/NCS and GDS.

Anonymous wrote:OK, I admit I'm new here. Who are the Big 3?

[Anonymous]

Maybe your child is not all that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am reading alot of sad things here posted by a number of people and not sure if I am assuming these correctly. They are: 1. Child's intelligence and potential being measured by college acceptance. 2. Child being sent to private school with college acceptance being the prime rationale and not development of curious mind and training. 3. Child's success only being measured by where he got into college.

We are sending ours to private school to take advantage of resources not found in public schools and to develop a curious mind that loves to learn and explore. This is a quality we want him to have for his entire life and not every school offers this quality. Our goal of success is to have a happy, well-adjusted son who leans what he really wants to do in life and explores the world no matter how old he becomes.

I'm very sad in realizing that many parents will make thier children feel like failures because they didn't measure up to their parents' expectations. Expect to have an unhappy and frustrated child if this is the case.

Agree with PP- we are sending DD to private b/c we want her to have the positive learning environment. I do want her to go to a four-year college (as opposed to a community to start) b/c I think so many great life experiences come from that experience. Beyond that and her eventually being self-sufficient and happy, those are really my only measures of success that I really hope she attains. The other "measures" will depend on her and her interests.