Unaccompanied minor on long haul transpacific flight?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How old? Who is she going to see?

11 yrs. he wants to take her on half of his vacation with his (childless therefor clueless about children- sorry) new wife. I’m so angry he’s be such an idiot in regards to his parenting responsibilities, I’m shaking. He’s generally a blue ribbon, horrible jerk but even for him, this was a shock to me.

And, what's wrong with him doing a direct flight and going on vacation as a family. If he is taking his child on a vacation he is doing his parenting responsibilities. If he went on vacation without his child then you'd complain. Real issue is you think that money is yours and are upset he got remarried.

no, incorrect. Issue is him putting my child on a 14 hr international flight (Asia to wear cost). We are divorced. If he could be bothered to complete the trip with kids rather than airmailing them back like an inconvenient package , I’d be supportive.

Then, fly with the kids back and forth or offer to do one way if he does one way. Problem solved. Or, if you don't want them airmailed back, let him keep them.

Some people are nuts.

So, you want OP to fly to Asia to escort her daughters back home so her ex can have a fun child-free vacation??? That’s insane. Never mind how exhausting and expensive that double flight would be, she’ll also burn through her vacation days. That is beyond ridiculous.

The dad needs to man up and fly with his children if he wants to take them on a long trip.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So why not let them have the girls for the entire trip. That will be a great experience for them. It sounds like you are more angry that the ex got married and they do these things than what is best for the kids. Find a compromise.

What makes you think the ex and his wife want to have the two children for time beyond the vacation? Wouldn’t the ex have offered that as an option? Instead he wants to send the girls home on a flight alone so that he and is new wife can continue vacationing in Asia without children.

This is the impression i got too. I don;t know why everyone is assuming OP just won't let he ex have the kids. I think she would be fine if they were flying round trip with the ex. I also think the answer to this question depends on the maturity and experience of the kids. Sounds like they are not very experienced travelers. OP, in your shoes, I would also say no.

OP is saying no to any travel. She'd probably say no even if Dad or stepmom flew both ways with the kids.

You are projecting. OP specifically said she would be fine with the ex taking the daughters on the trip if he flew with them. Most people are saying they wouldn’t let their 9 and 11 year olds fly to Asia alone.

The ex clearly wants to have a child-free vacation after spending a few days with his kids to check the box that he’s a good dad.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Why isn’t the dad keeping them for the whole vacation?

He wants alone time with the stepmom.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Note an 11 year old flies as an unaccompanied minor. They're not going to lose their passport because the flight crew holds it for them, and they arne't going to get confused in immigration, because the staff will escort them the entire way until an adult shows up to collect them. This is different from sending your MIL on a flight -- she's an adult and doesn't get that special treatment.

Some airlines have a policy that a UM can't be seated next to a male traveling alone.

What happens if they end up in another airport, can't fly out til next day, have to get a hotel room. What does the Airline staff do for them then? Serious question.

Those situations are highly unliekly, but if so, they'd have a staff member babysit them for that time.

That's a huge assumption. I did a quick google search on abandoned unaccompanied airline minors. Here are a few results.

https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/dr-gridlock/wp/2017/07/21/bumped-from-an-overbooked-flight-this-unaccompanied-minor-was-left-alone-at-the-gate/?utm_term=.d6794670e8bc
https://www.travelpulse.com/news/impacting-travel/8-year-old-boy-left-alone-in-germany-after-unaccompanied-minor-program-fails.html
https://www.flyertalk.com/forum/united-airlines-mileageplus/1426059-neglected-unaccompanied-minor.html
https://www.independent.co.uk/travel/news-and-advice/easyjet-unaccompanied-child-removed-overbooked-flight-minor-london-gatwick-toulouse-a7852811.html

And so on. I wouldn't trust my kids to a babysitter I've never met, why would I send them on a flight to a foreign country and have faith that complete strangers, because they happen to work for the airline, are going to do the right and responsible thing? How do you know they aren't going to come in contact with a pedophile, rapist, whatever? Airline employees can't be criminals? Do a google search on "airline employee arrested".

But, hey, you raise your kids your way, and I'll do mine.

[Anonymous]

OP, I fly annually on 14 hr flight between DC and the destination with my kid. My kid is still young, therefore one of us needs to travel with the kid now, but when the time comes (anywhere age 9 and up), we will let the kid fly alone unaccompanied minor. We are considering this option because the kid will be then have enough experiences to manage the boarding/un-boarding, pass immigration, pickup luggage, pass Customs agent, and meet the grandparents outside of the arrival door.
But, if OP's kid had never done this before, I may object to this idea. Experiences count and the OP's kid needs to know where/who/how to ask for help if needed.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How old? Who is she going to see?

11 yrs. he wants to take her on half of his vacation with his (childless therefor clueless about children- sorry) new wife. I’m so angry he’s be such an idiot in regards to his parenting responsibilities, I’m shaking. He’s generally a blue ribbon, horrible jerk but even for him, this was a shock to me.

And, what's wrong with him doing a direct flight and going on vacation as a family. If he is taking his child on a vacation he is doing his parenting responsibilities. If he went on vacation without his child then you'd complain. Real issue is you think that money is yours and are upset he got remarried.

no, incorrect. Issue is him putting my child on a 14 hr international flight (Asia to wear cost). We are divorced. If he could be bothered to complete the trip with kids rather than airmailing them back like an inconvenient package , I’d be supportive.

Then, fly with the kids back and forth or offer to do one way if he does one way. Problem solved. Or, if you don't want them airmailed back, let him keep them.

Some people are nuts.

So, you want OP to fly to Asia to escort her daughters back home so her ex can have a fun child-free vacation??? That’s insane. Never mind how exhausting and expensive that double flight would be, she’ll also burn through her vacation days. That is beyond ridiculous.

The dad needs to man up and fly with his children if he wants to take them on a long trip.

I would do this in a heartbeat so my kids could have the experience (travel and time with Dad). I think it is a pretty lame excuse by OP.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How old? Who is she going to see?

11 yrs. he wants to take her on half of his vacation with his (childless therefor clueless about children- sorry) new wife. I’m so angry he’s be such an idiot in regards to his parenting responsibilities, I’m shaking. He’s generally a blue ribbon, horrible jerk but even for him, this was a shock to me.

And, what's wrong with him doing a direct flight and going on vacation as a family. If he is taking his child on a vacation he is doing his parenting responsibilities. If he went on vacation without his child then you'd complain. Real issue is you think that money is yours and are upset he got remarried.

no, incorrect. Issue is him putting my child on a 14 hr international flight (Asia to wear cost). We are divorced. If he could be bothered to complete the trip with kids rather than airmailing them back like an inconvenient package , I’d be supportive.

Then, fly with the kids back and forth or offer to do one way if he does one way. Problem solved. Or, if you don't want them airmailed back, let him keep them.

Some people are nuts.

So, you want OP to fly to Asia to escort her daughters back home so her ex can have a fun child-free vacation??? That’s insane. Never mind how exhausting and expensive that double flight would be, she’ll also burn through her vacation days. That is beyond ridiculous.

The dad needs to man up and fly with his children if he wants to take them on a long trip.

I would do this in a heartbeat so my kids could have the experience (travel and time with Dad). I think it is a pretty lame excuse by OP.

A ticket to “Asia” is fairly expensive, particularly a ticket that basically turns around and comes home immediately. I couldn’t afford it (not OP) without sacrificing the money I’d spend on a ticket for a vacation of my own, with or without my kids. Not everyone is made of money. I would be unwilling to sacrifice my own vacation to spend $1000+ to essentially pick up my kids in Thailand. I would consider the hassle if dad paid for the ticket, but no. If he wants to take them, he needs to be personally responsible for them getting there and back. If he can’t be bothered, I don’t see why I should go to the trouble and expense. Why is it my responsibility more than his to make sure they get this experience?

[Anonymous]

In today’s N.Y. Post -

Man sexually assaulted crying teen on international flight: authorities

https://nypost.com/2019/05/21/man-sexually-assaulted-crying-teen-on-international-flight-authorities/

This is not the only instance of these things happening. So umm, no thanks to unaccompanied minor flying....

[Anonymous]

Have your ex send them back in business class, so they have more privacy and wont be seated right next to some creepy weirdo.

[Anonymous]

If Ex and SM want to pay OP’s expenses and age had the vacation time, she may want to pick the kids up. But I doubt they are willing to do that.

[Anonymous]

Plenty of creepy weirdos in biz class and even on some of the nice Asian carriers, those privacy partitions for the lie-flat pods don’t even reach to the ceiling.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:There must be several bitter step moms here. I see no other way to explain the bizarre attacking of OP for sanely forbidding her ex from sending two elementary girls that have rarely flown before solo across the pacific. You people that think this is fine are nutso.

+1000. Especially the last sentence. Having traveled extensively myself, no way in hell. And the fact that the dad thinks this is remotely ok would make me question his judgment as a parent.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I let my 11 yr old and her friend fly to Switzerland to visit their best friend who had moved their six months ago. It was NBD and they had a blast. I’d be more weary if alone but 2 can watch out for each other.

Switzerland vs. Asia. No brainer there. Asia would be a HARD no.

[Anonymous]

One compromise would be for you to meet the kids in California. The flight would be shorter for them and you could spend a couple of days in LA before returning home.
I started doing a transatlantic flight (7 hours) unaccompanied at age 8 without any incident.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How old? Who is she going to see?

11 yrs. he wants to take her on half of his vacation with his (childless therefor clueless about children- sorry) new wife. I’m so angry he’s be such an idiot in regards to his parenting responsibilities, I’m shaking. He’s generally a blue ribbon, horrible jerk but even for him, this was a shock to me.

And, what's wrong with him doing a direct flight and going on vacation as a family. If he is taking his child on a vacation he is doing his parenting responsibilities. If he went on vacation without his child then you'd complain. Real issue is you think that money is yours and are upset he got remarried.

no, incorrect. Issue is him putting my child on a 14 hr international flight (Asia to wear cost). We are divorced. If he could be bothered to complete the trip with kids rather than airmailing them back like an inconvenient package , I’d be supportive.

Then, fly with the kids back and forth or offer to do one way if he does one way. Problem solved. Or, if you don't want them airmailed back, let him keep them.

Some people are nuts.

So, you want OP to fly to Asia to escort her daughters back home so her ex can have a fun child-free vacation??? That’s insane. Never mind how exhausting and expensive that double flight would be, she’ll also burn through her vacation days. That is beyond ridiculous.

The dad needs to man up and fly with his children if he wants to take them on a long trip.

I would do this in a heartbeat so my kids could have the experience (travel and time with Dad). I think it is a pretty lame excuse by OP.

you would seriously spend 40+ hrs traveling on planes to pick your kids up from a trip with their father. Seriously? You are a better parent than me. i would not do this. I wold not fly to Asia only to turn right back around.