Just another redshirting vent

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Can you always tell why a kid was red-shirted if you don’t know them well?

Some people can. They can also see through your BS “excuses.” See the other thread on this.

My, my. Sooo angry. Fall birthdays here. Just wondering how everyone is always so certain why another parent did red-shirt when they don’t even know the kid. And of course a stranger knows much better than a parent, don’t you agree?

So then you have no idea what it's like in our shoes, as parents of children who turn 5 in July or August, starting K with kids who turned 5 LAST summer, and are now more than a full year older than them, and teasing them on the playground for being babyish and not wanting to play them them. I'm not worried about academics for my son I'm worried about the social aspect of him being picked on for being the youngest, smallest, and least socially mature boy in a class with kids who were held back, are over a year older than him, and then pick on him for being small!

I just don’t understand why you would put your child in this situation.

Spoken like someone who has zero clue what it's like to be not sending your kid to privates. You can't just arbitrarily decide your 5 year old wont' start kindergarten. The truant officers will come knocking. The people who do it send their kids to prrivate settings before entering K

My DC is now in college, so things may have changed, but when they were scheduled to go to kindergarten we felt they needed an extra year. MCPS at the time just had us fill out a short form and automatically let us postpone the entry into K. DC did attend 1/2 day preschool for that year, but I don't remember it being a requirement.

For those rabid anti-red-shirters, the cut-off at that point was significantly later than it is now. DC would have been one of the youngest with a fall birthday and MCPS apparently felt that age was too young because they moved the cut-off date up. There were also other issues involved which we coordinated with the preschool teachers, the doctor, and other specialists. In school, despite being older, DC was frequently a target of bullies, rather than the bully. I had other parents contacting me because their (younger) children were upset at how my child was being treated.

My child, while academically advanced, needed that extra year. Fellow classmates were far better served by having DC be the oldest kid in the class than the youngest. You don't know what issues another child may have (and frankly, it's none of your business), but you need to recognize that parents know their child better than you do. Any parent who chooses to redshirt does so knowing that it has pros and cons and probably agonizes over the choice. While theoretically they may exist, I have never actually encountered any parent who chooses to redshirt so their child will have a competitive
edge getting into gifted programs, college, etc.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Friendly acquaintance posted a "back to school" pic of her son complete with his age (6.75 years) and grade (Junior First/ Prep First/ whatever your private school calls it). This little boy has a late fall birthday!!! He is going to be almost 8 years old when he starts first grade. Meanwhile, my child has a July birthday and I cannot afford private so he will be starting K right after he turns 5 and starting first right after he turns 6. He and this child are going to be almost 2 full years apart while in the same grade. I KNOW, it doesn't affect me in the slightest especially since he isn't even at my child's school. But it makes me so angry! My child is a little socially immature and I am worried he is not only going to be chronologically the youngest when he starts real school but he is going to be socially young for his age too, making it so much harder for him if his classroom is full of kids who are 7 when he is only 5. Ugh. Vent over. Side note- does anyone know if redshirting is as prevalent in public schools?

How is your public K classroom full of 7-year olds?

Well I hope it's not, but judging by how many people are telling me "just hold him back" when I've said many times we are using public, apparently it's completely allowed and therefore will be super common???

If you can't do it, it must not be super common.

The boy you're talking about is in private. He won't be in class together with your child. For all practical purposes, he exists in a parallel universe of education. So why do you care?

People are telling you to hold him back because YOU are the one telling them he's immature and young for his age. Stop saying that and people won't recommend that you hold him back. You're like a person who keeps talking about having a fever and then get angry when people recommend Tylenol.

OP cares because her kid will be competing against this kid in the college application process.

[Anonymous]

We kind of redshirted but not really. My son has an October birthday, and it was a blessing in disguise. I have a problem with K at 5 for two reasons. First, it is developmentally inappropriate, and second, it is academically meaningless (at least for us). So I put my son into a private Jr K year program with a very small class, lots of outdoors and playtime, arts, music and of course academics. So in a way, he had another year of playtime where he also effortlessly absorbed the academic content of K. After that year, he went directly into 1st grade. It was perfect because at that point he was ready for school, and academically ready for 1st.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
My DC is now in college, so things may have changed, but when they were scheduled to go to kindergarten we felt they needed an extra year. MCPS at the time just had us fill out a short form and automatically let us postpone the entry into K. DC did attend 1/2 day preschool for that year, but I don't remember it being a requirement.

For those rabid anti-red-shirters, the cut-off at that point was significantly later than it is now. DC would have been one of the youngest with a fall birthday and MCPS apparently felt that age was too young because they moved the cut-off date up. There were also other issues involved which we coordinated with the preschool teachers, the doctor, and other specialists. In school, despite being older, DC was frequently a target of bullies, rather than the bully. I had other parents contacting me because their (younger) children were upset at how my child was being treated.

My child, while academically advanced, needed that extra year. Fellow classmates were far better served by having DC be the oldest kid in the class than the youngest. You don't know what issues another child may have (and frankly, it's none of your business), but you need to recognize that parents know their child better than you do. Any parent who chooses to redshirt does so knowing that it has pros and cons and probably agonizes over the choice. While theoretically they may exist, I have never actually encountered any parent who chooses to redshirt so their child will have a competitive
edge getting into gifted programs, college, etc.

Things have changed. Reread the post about redshirting in Boston.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We kind of redshirted but not really. My son has an October birthday, and it was a blessing in disguise. I have a problem with K at 5 for two reasons. First, it is developmentally inappropriate, and second, it is academically meaningless (at least for us). So I put my son into a private Jr K year program with a very small class, lots of outdoors and playtime, arts, music and of course academics. So in a way, he had another year of playtime where he also effortlessly absorbed the academic content of K. After that year, he went directly into 1st grade. It was perfect because at that point he was ready for school, and academically ready for 1st.

I'm so fascinated by the people who say stuff like this. What "academics" do you think kids learn in K?

If your child isn't of average or above intelligence level then you need to understand and accept that it's okay that they struggle with a couple of things and that you may need to work on them at home too. That doesn't mean that the material is "developmentally inappropriate". Not everyone can find the classes easy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:For all the parents claiming that something "doesn't affect you" because the kid(s) in question are in other classrooms or schools, they are all part of the same college application cohort. So yes, it absolutely does affect everyone in the year level to have redshirted kids.

Oh my goodness. Are you always so hysterical and prone to drama?

Note that the only studies of frequency of redshirting show it to be statistically rare in public schools. Private schools can do whatever they want to do.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:That poor kid. How embarrassing.

This. Especially when he's in high school and college.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
My DC is now in college, so things may have changed, but when they were scheduled to go to kindergarten we felt they needed an extra year. MCPS at the time just had us fill out a short form and automatically let us postpone the entry into K. DC did attend 1/2 day preschool for that year, but I don't remember it being a requirement.

For those rabid anti-red-shirters, the cut-off at that point was significantly later than it is now. DC would have been one of the youngest with a fall birthday and MCPS apparently felt that age was too young because they moved the cut-off date up. There were also other issues involved which we coordinated with the preschool teachers, the doctor, and other specialists. In school, despite being older, DC was frequently a target of bullies, rather than the bully. I had other parents contacting me because their (younger) children were upset at how my child was being treated.

My child, while academically advanced, needed that extra year. Fellow classmates were far better served by having DC be the oldest kid in the class than the youngest. You don't know what issues another child may have (and frankly, it's none of your business), but you need to recognize that parents know their child better than you do. Any parent who chooses to redshirt does so knowing that it has pros and cons and probably agonizes over the choice. While theoretically they may exist, I have never actually encountered any parent who chooses to redshirt so their child will have a competitive
edge getting into gifted programs, college, etc.

Things have changed. Reread the post about redshirting in Boston.

Um, 08/30/2018 19:40 here.

I was addressing the earlier poster's statement that kids attending public school couldn't arbitrarily decide to redshirt. Our public school district let us do just that. The post I found (page 2) about redshirting in Boston claimed a high percentahe of red-shirters, which would seem to support my claim that public school parents can choose to redshirt.

Here's what MCPS currently has on their website about delaying K. Apparently, parents can still delay enrollment on grounds of immaturity:

https://www.montgomeryschoolsmd.org/info/enroll/requirements.aspx

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:For all the parents claiming that something "doesn't affect you" because the kid(s) in question are in other classrooms or schools, they are all part of the same college application cohort. So yes, it absolutely does affect everyone in the year level to have redshirted kids.

Oh my goodness. Are you always so hysterical and prone to drama?

Note that the only studies of frequency of redshirting show it to be statistically rare in public schools. Private schools can do whatever they want to do.

Of course they can. But that's not the question, is it? The question is whether it affects everyone else. And the answer is yes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We kind of redshirted but not really. My son has an October birthday, and it was a blessing in disguise. I have a problem with K at 5 for two reasons. First, it is developmentally inappropriate, and second, it is academically meaningless (at least for us). So I put my son into a private Jr K year program with a very small class, lots of outdoors and playtime, arts, music and of course academics. So in a way, he had another year of playtime where he also effortlessly absorbed the academic content of K. After that year, he went directly into 1st grade. It was perfect because at that point he was ready for school, and academically ready for 1st.

I'm so fascinated by the people who say stuff like this. What "academics" do you think kids learn in K?

If your child isn't of average or above intelligence level then you need to understand and accept that it's okay that they struggle with a couple of things and that you may need to work on them at home too. That doesn't mean that the material is "developmentally inappropriate". Not everyone can find the classes easy.

+1. I suspect many high-achieving families who redshirt are used to themselves being top performers during school, and they can’t stomach the idea of their own children not also being a top performer. So, they redshirt in order to try to ensure that their children are in the top tier in academics, athletics, etc.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We kind of redshirted but not really. My son has an October birthday, and it was a blessing in disguise. I have a problem with K at 5 for two reasons. First, it is developmentally inappropriate, and second, it is academically meaningless (at least for us). So I put my son into a private Jr K year program with a very small class, lots of outdoors and playtime, arts, music and of course academics. So in a way, he had another year of playtime where he also effortlessly absorbed the academic content of K. After that year, he went directly into 1st grade. It was perfect because at that point he was ready for school, and academically ready for 1st.

I'm so fascinated by the people who say stuff like this. What "academics" do you think kids learn in K?

If your child isn't of average or above intelligence level then you need to understand and accept that it's okay that they struggle with a couple of things and that you may need to work on them at home too. That doesn't mean that the material is "developmentally inappropriate". Not everyone can find the classes easy.

You misunderstand. It's not the material that's developmentally inappropriate, god knows most five-year olds can learn to read. It's the idea that you need to spend a full day in school to do so. That, I believe, is not appropriate for the five-year old set. So we opted to put our child into a setting where he learned all the things he would have learned in public K - but without being confined to a classroom. I just didn't want that for him at five. A year later, it was OK but not at five.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We kind of redshirted but not really. My son has an October birthday, and it was a blessing in disguise. I have a problem with K at 5 for two reasons. First, it is developmentally inappropriate, and second, it is academically meaningless (at least for us). So I put my son into a private Jr K year program with a very small class, lots of outdoors and playtime, arts, music and of course academics. So in a way, he had another year of playtime where he also effortlessly absorbed the academic content of K. After that year, he went directly into 1st grade. It was perfect because at that point he was ready for school, and academically ready for 1st.

I'm so fascinated by the people who say stuff like this. What "academics" do you think kids learn in K?

If your child isn't of average or above intelligence level then you need to understand and accept that it's okay that they struggle with a couple of things and that you may need to work on them at home too. That doesn't mean that the material is "developmentally inappropriate". Not everyone can find the classes easy.

+1. I suspect many high-achieving families who redshirt are used to themselves being top performers during school, and they can’t stomach the idea of their own children not also being a top performer. So, they redshirt in order to try to ensure that their children are in the top tier in academics, athletics, etc.

You fail at reading comprehension too.

[Anonymous]

20:55 again. Meant to say that I suspect there’s another type of redshirting family—those that suspect/are fearful of a diagnosis like ADHD, and don’t want their child labeled as such when they hope the answer may just be that their child is just “not ready” for what they think is an inappropriately academic K environment. They are hoping that with another year before K things will sort themselves out.

I’ve seen studies cited to support the above—namely, that younger kids are more likely to be diagnosed with ADHD than kids who’re older in K. While I don’t doubt those findings, I wonder whether older kids are able to compensate in some ways such that the diagnosis is more likely to be missed—in other words, instead of false positives in younger kids, false negatives in older kids is also plausible.

Really, if a diagnosis like ADHD is suspected, the best way to proceed would be to get your kid in school and connected with services sooner, vs. waiting a year. However, I could understand why parents might wait and instead attribute their child’s perceived lack of readiness to the K environment as inappropriate for 5yos, esp.for boys.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We kind of redshirted but not really. My son has an October birthday, and it was a blessing in disguise. I have a problem with K at 5 for two reasons. First, it is developmentally inappropriate, and second, it is academically meaningless (at least for us). So I put my son into a private Jr K year program with a very small class, lots of outdoors and playtime, arts, music and of course academics. So in a way, he had another year of playtime where he also effortlessly absorbed the academic content of K. After that year, he went directly into 1st grade. It was perfect because at that point he was ready for school, and academically ready for 1st.

“Developmentally inappropriate” based on what? What educational expert? Or is this just your opinion?

And if it’s academically meaningless, why not just start them on time?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:20:55 again. Meant to say that I suspect there’s another type of redshirting family—those that suspect/are fearful of a diagnosis like ADHD, and don’t want their child labeled as such when they hope the answer may just be that their child is just “not ready” for what they think is an inappropriately academic K environment. They are hoping that with another year before K things will sort themselves out.

I’ve seen studies cited to support the above—namely, that younger kids are more likely to be diagnosed with ADHD than kids who’re older in K. While I don’t doubt those findings, I wonder whether older kids are able to compensate in some ways such that the diagnosis is more likely to be missed—in other words, instead of false positives in younger kids, false negatives in older kids is also plausible.

Really, if a diagnosis like ADHD is suspected, the best way to proceed would be to get your kid in school and connected with services sooner, vs. waiting a year. However, I could understand why parents might wait and instead attribute their child’s perceived lack of readiness to the K environment as inappropriate for 5yos, esp.for boys.

or they HAVE a diagnosis and delay K. you never know and should MYOB.