Teenager does not want job

[Anonymous]

I think with the quote today of only 20% of 2014 college graduates having a job, it would be quite reasonable to see if this teen could increase her volunteer hours to 20 per week during the summer as well as seeing if she could at least watch children as a sitter on the weekends or in the evenings as I do know part-time jobs can be hard to find. Another important thing to consider is that if she has any idea of fields she may want to enter in terms of college study, then she might also look for an unpaid internship or to do a couple of "job shadow" experiences. Either of these things might help in her college application process.

What is expected of this teen within her family unit can vary, but it is important for any older teen not to become to self-preoccupied as the wider world does not operate on entitlements. All kids should have chores to do, a budget to learn how to manage money with choice on wants versus needs.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My kids know the rule: If you want to go to college, you have to pay for it.

Oldest worked her ass off at school and got a full ride to a good college, second worked 40hrs/week during summers starting 9th grade and had part time jobs during the school year and is paying essentially out of pocket + a few scholarships. Youngest one is currently a sophomore and relying on loans plus a little saved up over her high school career.

Our kids knew that they had to do the work to get jobs. Some parents can "hire" their kid at their own company, but we couldn't, and wouldn't. Some might see it as mean or bad parenting, but you have to realize that we won't be able to pay for their first house, or their wedding, or their graduate school. If we pay for their college, they never will learn to pull their own way. They will expect us to bail out their bad decisions. And if DD1 couldn't find a job over the summer and needed a bit more money, we would probably loan her a bit (with interest) as we know she is a hardworking adult who will pay us back.

I see parents paying for their kids to go to college, and it makes me sad. Those are kids who will never truly be independent. We could pay for college for our kids, but we decided that it was not our jobs.

See I find your approach sad. VERY sad. You don't have to pay for college to be "independent." Your approach makes my stomach turn.

[Anonymous]

My DD is only starting high school, but her job in life is to go to school and do well. Camp and family vacation are pretty much all that fit in her summer. When she's older, she'll probably be an unpaid intern for a business or nonprofit she's interested in. If she felt she needed money for a car or more expensive stuff than we're willing to pay, then she could go and get a job if it didn't affect school.

We don't have to withhold anything for her to understand that because she sees what we do every day. DD understands that earning the same standard of living she enjoys now as an adult means going to a top college, grad school, and 60-80 hour work weeks. We set the example and that's enough.