Men seem eager to be remarried!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m literally being told by the divorced dads: I want a family structure; I want another kid; I have money and can support a family.

Yeah, they do. They also want someone to do the household stuff (best case, split the load). They do not want to be solely responsible for household and kid stuff. Which is fine, I don't either, but the big question is why did they divorce then?

This. Women usually file for divorce…not men. 70% are initiated by the woman.

I keep hearing this stat on this board; is there a citation?

It is cited so many places

Honestly, men are more pragmatic when it comes to the prospect of divorce. They take time, perform a Benefit Cost Analysis and find the best scenario and will probably only pull the divorce trigger when most expeditious and cost-effective. Look at the lesbian divorce rate vs gay men if you want to some broader context. Why is it the way it is? Why such a stark contrast? Anyone?

I think a lot of lesbians have previous heterosexual marriages, history of abuse, children coming into the marriage, etc.
I bet if you looked at statistics for first marriages, they would be pretty similar in both groups.

I also do think you are right in that women like having things defined and like having everyone on the same page in respect to relationships. Maybe it’s because we live in a patriarchal society and women need to maintain social relationships more than men do?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m literally being told by the divorced dads: I want a family structure; I want another kid; I have money and can support a family.

Yeah, they do. They also want someone to do the household stuff (best case, split the load). They do not want to be solely responsible for household and kid stuff. Which is fine, I don't either, but the big question is why did they divorce then?

This. Women usually file for divorce…not men. 70% are initiated by the woman.

I keep hearing this stat on this board; is there a citation?

It is cited so many places

Honestly, men are more pragmatic when it comes to the prospect of divorce. They take time, perform a Benefit Cost Analysis and find the best scenario and will probably only pull the divorce trigger when most expeditious and cost-effective. Look at the lesbian divorce rate vs gay men if you want to some broader context. Why is it the way it is? Why such a stark contrast? Anyone?

Are you really asking why highly promiscuous men who continue being promiscuous with other people after marriage are content with marriage? You can't be this stupid.

No, sweetheart, I was responding to the post about 70% of divorces being initiated by women. Reading comprehension is your friend.

You compared marriages between gay men to marriages between women as if studies, anecdotes and rubbing two brain cells together couldn't tell you that the former doesn't treat marriage any differently than single life.

You’re saying gay men can’t commit to fidelity the same way women can? That’s pretty messed up and bigoted. It’s also not true. Some gay married men open it up, but not all.


I’m saying the skewed 70% divorce rate figure can more shown through a reliance on base emotions and just basic…flightiness. When you rely on feelings more that’s what happens. He could be a great guy who pulls his weight, but if you “feel” an “emotional load imbalance” then you’ll quickly pull the trigger on a divorce. Modern men do a lot, but don’t require as much validation or credit for their accomplishments. They don’t keep tally on an imaginary emotional load spreadsheet, if you will.

I look forward to your banshee caterwall of a response.

Wait, what?
No one quickly pulls the trigger on divorce.
I think the reason for the 70% statistic is that women are generally responsible for filing paperwork in most families. You know, because of the very real emotional load imbalance.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m literally being told by the divorced dads: I want a family structure; I want another kid; I have money and can support a family.

Yeah, they do. They also want someone to do the household stuff (best case, split the load). They do not want to be solely responsible for household and kid stuff. Which is fine, I don't either, but the big question is why did they divorce then?

This. Women usually file for divorce…not men. 70% are initiated by the woman.

I keep hearing this stat on this board; is there a citation?

It is cited so many places

Honestly, men are more pragmatic when it comes to the prospect of divorce. They take time, perform a Benefit Cost Analysis and find the best scenario and will probably only pull the divorce trigger when most expeditious and cost-effective. Look at the lesbian divorce rate vs gay men if you want to some broader context. Why is it the way it is? Why such a stark contrast? Anyone?

I think a lot of lesbians have previous heterosexual marriages, history of abuse, children coming into the marriage, etc.
I bet if you looked at statistics for first marriages, they would be pretty similar in both groups.

I also do think you are right in that women like having things defined and like having everyone on the same page in respect to relationships. Maybe it’s because we live in a patriarchal society and women need to maintain social relationships more than men do?

You said “I think” and and “I bet” without any real proof of your assertions regarding the high lesbian divorce rate. It’s the highest divorce rate of all groups bar none.

It’s more likely that women are generally more catty, passive aggressive, flighty, and more likely base decisions on emotions than facts and divorce based on these factors.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m literally being told by the divorced dads: I want a family structure; I want another kid; I have money and can support a family.

Yeah, they do. They also want someone to do the household stuff (best case, split the load). They do not want to be solely responsible for household and kid stuff. Which is fine, I don't either, but the big question is why did they divorce then?

This. Women usually file for divorce…not men. 70% are initiated by the woman.

I keep hearing this stat on this board; is there a citation?

It is cited so many places

Honestly, men are more pragmatic when it comes to the prospect of divorce. They take time, perform a Benefit Cost Analysis and find the best scenario and will probably only pull the divorce trigger when most expeditious and cost-effective. Look at the lesbian divorce rate vs gay men if you want to some broader context. Why is it the way it is? Why such a stark contrast? Anyone?

Are you really asking why highly promiscuous men who continue being promiscuous with other people after marriage are content with marriage? You can't be this stupid.

No, sweetheart, I was responding to the post about 70% of divorces being initiated by women. Reading comprehension is your friend.

You compared marriages between gay men to marriages between women as if studies, anecdotes and rubbing two brain cells together couldn't tell you that the former doesn't treat marriage any differently than single life.

You’re saying gay men can’t commit to fidelity the same way women can? That’s pretty messed up and bigoted. It’s also not true. Some gay married men open it up, but not all.


I’m saying the skewed 70% divorce rate figure can more shown through a reliance on base emotions and just basic…flightiness. When you rely on feelings more that’s what happens. He could be a great guy who pulls his weight, but if you “feel” an “emotional load imbalance” then you’ll quickly pull the trigger on a divorce. Modern men do a lot, but don’t require as much validation or credit for their accomplishments. They don’t keep tally on an imaginary emotional load spreadsheet, if you will.

I look forward to your banshee caterwall of a response.

Wait, what?
No one quickly pulls the trigger on divorce.
I think the reason for the 70% statistic is that women are generally responsible for filing paperwork in most families. You know, because of the very real emotional load imbalance.

You’ve convinced yourself that an emotional load imbalance is real. And yes, women pull the divorce much more quickly than men.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m literally being told by the divorced dads: I want a family structure; I want another kid; I have money and can support a family.

Yeah, they do. They also want someone to do the household stuff (best case, split the load). They do not want to be solely responsible for household and kid stuff. Which is fine, I don't either, but the big question is why did they divorce then?

This. Women usually file for divorce…not men. 70% are initiated by the woman.

I keep hearing this stat on this board; is there a citation?

It is cited so many places

Honestly, men are more pragmatic when it comes to the prospect of divorce. They take time, perform a Benefit Cost Analysis and find the best scenario and will probably only pull the divorce trigger when most expeditious and cost-effective. Look at the lesbian divorce rate vs gay men if you want to some broader context. Why is it the way it is? Why such a stark contrast? Anyone?

I don’t have insight into every man, but when my exDH knew I was unhappy about his treatment of me and the kids and the imbalance within our family life, he waited until things were perfectly tipped in his favor to file. Spent down our shared assets, got a secret promotion, filed 2 weeks before the title and pay raise was official, and then pranced off into the sunset with a 7 figure salary and me making less than 1/10th of that.

The second he realized the balance of our relationship was permanently in his favor, he was done with it. He got what he needed- kids old enough to not need to be wiped or buckled in, childcare so he could build his career- and he was out.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m literally being told by the divorced dads: I want a family structure; I want another kid; I have money and can support a family.

Yeah, they do. They also want someone to do the household stuff (best case, split the load). They do not want to be solely responsible for household and kid stuff. Which is fine, I don't either, but the big question is why did they divorce then?

This. Women usually file for divorce…not men. 70% are initiated by the woman.

I keep hearing this stat on this board; is there a citation?

It is cited so many places

Honestly, men are more pragmatic when it comes to the prospect of divorce. They take time, perform a Benefit Cost Analysis and find the best scenario and will probably only pull the divorce trigger when most expeditious and cost-effective. Look at the lesbian divorce rate vs gay men if you want to some broader context. Why is it the way it is? Why such a stark contrast? Anyone?

Are you really asking why highly promiscuous men who continue being promiscuous with other people after marriage are content with marriage? You can't be this stupid.

No, sweetheart, I was responding to the post about 70% of divorces being initiated by women. Reading comprehension is your friend.

You compared marriages between gay men to marriages between women as if studies, anecdotes and rubbing two brain cells together couldn't tell you that the former doesn't treat marriage any differently than single life.

You’re saying gay men can’t commit to fidelity the same way women can? That’s pretty messed up and bigoted. It’s also not true. Some gay married men open it up, but not all.


I’m saying the skewed 70% divorce rate figure can more shown through a reliance on base emotions and just basic…flightiness. When you rely on feelings more that’s what happens. He could be a great guy who pulls his weight, but if you “feel” an “emotional load imbalance” then you’ll quickly pull the trigger on a divorce. Modern men do a lot, but don’t require as much validation or credit for their accomplishments. They don’t keep tally on an imaginary emotional load spreadsheet, if you will.

I look forward to your banshee caterwall of a response.

Wait, what?
No one quickly pulls the trigger on divorce.
I think the reason for the 70% statistic is that women are generally responsible for filing paperwork in most families. You know, because of the very real emotional load imbalance.

You’ve convinced yourself that an emotional load imbalance is real. And yes, women pull the divorce much more quickly than men.

You said that 70% of divorces are initiated by women. That is literally proof of women doing the paperwork involved in the marriage/family.

I don’t really see how being the person who files paperwork is evidence of being flighty or basing your actions on emotion.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m literally being told by the divorced dads: I want a family structure; I want another kid; I have money and can support a family.

Yeah, they do. They also want someone to do the household stuff (best case, split the load). They do not want to be solely responsible for household and kid stuff. Which is fine, I don't either, but the big question is why did they divorce then?

This. Women usually file for divorce…not men. 70% are initiated by the woman.

I keep hearing this stat on this board; is there a citation?

It is cited so many places

Honestly, men are more pragmatic when it comes to the prospect of divorce. They take time, perform a Benefit Cost Analysis and find the best scenario and will probably only pull the divorce trigger when most expeditious and cost-effective. Look at the lesbian divorce rate vs gay men if you want to some broader context. Why is it the way it is? Why such a stark contrast? Anyone?

I think a lot of lesbians have previous heterosexual marriages, history of abuse, children coming into the marriage, etc.
I bet if you looked at statistics for first marriages, they would be pretty similar in both groups.

I also do think you are right in that women like having things defined and like having everyone on the same page in respect to relationships. Maybe it’s because we live in a patriarchal society and women need to maintain social relationships more than men do?

You said “I think” and and “I bet” without any real proof of your assertions regarding the high lesbian divorce rate. It’s the highest divorce rate of all groups bar none.

It’s more likely that women are generally more catty, passive aggressive, flighty, and more likely base decisions on emotions than facts and divorce based on these factors.

There are no statistics on divorce rates for first marriages among two women. There are statistics that a lot of lesbians are victims of abuse in prior heterosexual relationships.

And really, if we are going to compare the general cattiness of heterosexual women, do you really think the cattiness level is more like homosexual women or homosexual men?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Here you go:

https://www.whitleylawfirmpc.com/3-reasons-why-women-initiate-divorce-more-often-than-men/amp/

https://www.asanet.org/women-more-likely-men-initiate-divorces-not-non-marital-breakups/

https://affinitypsych.com/why-do-women-initiate-divorce-more-frequently-than-men/


(I am divorced; I have not dated a divorced man and I am late 40s—there is a reason a wife got rid of him in most cases).

No, in most cases, there's a reason why a man got rid of his wife.

Then the rate of men initiating divorce would be higher than 30%. I guess you don’t understand statistics.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Late thirties woman looking for a husband. I’m dating a lot of divorced days; mid thirties; make good money; have a kid or two. They all want to settle down and be married and are even open for another kid.

It’s definitely raining men! ☺️

Are they!?!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m literally being told by the divorced dads: I want a family structure; I want another kid; I have money and can support a family.

Yeah, they do. They also want someone to do the household stuff (best case, split the load). They do not want to be solely responsible for household and kid stuff. Which is fine, I don't either, but the big question is why did they divorce then?

I divorced when my kids were 15 and 13. I dated but didn't marry until one was graduated from university and the other was a junior in college. I ran my household perfectly fine on my own, and I effectively had 90% physical custody as the kids didn't want to live with their mother for a variety of reasons. Men run their households just fine, thank you very much. And the fact that you automatically slandered an entire gender with this trope indicates lazy, archaic thinking and likely more than a touch of bitterness and projection. You're just not in touch with the real world and your misandry is revolting. Be better.

You are an exception. 90 % of divorces between college educated couples are initiated by women. Male infidelity (#1 cause) ; unequal distribution of labor; controlling tendencies of male spouse; emotional pressure etc.

So yes, something to thing about if a woman dates a divorced man with college degree.

I'm not an exception. Nor would I have called myself a "single dad." I ran a household, yes, but I was divorced, not single.

I wanted to divorce for YEARS before she stepped out. I didn't because I feared how the courts would cut off access to my kids. There was no way I was going to be a Wednesday and every other weekend father. I know a LOT of frustrated men who feel the same way.

Again, I reiterate that men will sacrifice their happiness for their family. I've seen repeatedly, however, that once a woman decides she's unhappy and she blames her husband and the drudgery and labor of raising children for that unhappiness, she will not only be COACHED by therapists to "self-actualize" and leave, she will do so in a hurry. Usually, she wants a big financial payout if she does it. Often, this is with exit affairs -- they get caught up in limerance and think they can divorce, take up with the new guy and collect a fat check every month. At least Virginia and some other states penalize adultery.

The family courts have gotten better about recognizing the contribution of fathers. But they're still woefully behind. And that more than degrees attained, has more to do with the fact that women initiate divorce more than men -- they think they have more to gain.

Weird anomaly; but thanks for posting it over and over again I guess.

Cling to your delusion, PP. It doesn't make it an "anomaly" or "weird." It's very common. You're the one living in lala land. Maybe stop with your projection and seek help for your mental disorders.

Despite your mature diction choices and B&W thinking, PP, if you only would write that a few million more times, maybe, just maybe, working fathers in America would indeed be the involved, proactive, emotionally supportive default parent you claim to be. Fingers crossed!!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m literally being told by the divorced dads: I want a family structure; I want another kid; I have money and can support a family.

Yeah, they do. They also want someone to do the household stuff (best case, split the load). They do not want to be solely responsible for household and kid stuff. Which is fine, I don't either, but the big question is why did they divorce then?

I divorced when my kids were 15 and 13. I dated but didn't marry until one was graduated from university and the other was a junior in college. I ran my household perfectly fine on my own, and I effectively had 90% physical custody as the kids didn't want to live with their mother for a variety of reasons. Men run their households just fine, thank you very much. And the fact that you automatically slandered an entire gender with this trope indicates lazy, archaic thinking and likely more than a touch of bitterness and projection. You're just not in touch with the real world and your misandry is revolting. Be better.

You are an exception. 90 % of divorces between college educated couples are initiated by women. Male infidelity (#1 cause) ; unequal distribution of labor; controlling tendencies of male spouse; emotional pressure etc.

So yes, something to thing about if a woman dates a divorced man with college degree.

I'm not an exception. Nor would I have called myself a "single dad." I ran a household, yes, but I was divorced, not single.

I wanted to divorce for YEARS before she stepped out. I didn't because I feared how the courts would cut off access to my kids. There was no way I was going to be a Wednesday and every other weekend father. I know a LOT of frustrated men who feel the same way.

Again, I reiterate that men will sacrifice their happiness for their family. I've seen repeatedly, however, that once a woman decides she's unhappy and she blames her husband and the drudgery and labor of raising children for that unhappiness, she will not only be COACHED by therapists to "self-actualize" and leave, she will do so in a hurry. Usually, she wants a big financial payout if she does it. Often, this is with exit affairs -- they get caught up in limerance and think they can divorce, take up with the new guy and collect a fat check every month. At least Virginia and some other states penalize adultery.

The family courts have gotten better about recognizing the contribution of fathers. But they're still woefully behind. And that more than degrees attained, has more to do with the fact that women initiate divorce more than men -- they think they have more to gain.

Nobody here cares about your fiction. You need to go take some classes because your plot sucks. No high functioning man who can run a household effectively is spending the first few days of the new year crying about his ex online and making up foolishness about what happens in women's therapy sessions.

And wtf state is he pretending to live in that doesn’t automatically give 50/50 custody.
What a joke.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m literally being told by the divorced dads: I want a family structure; I want another kid; I have money and can support a family.

Yeah, they do. They also want someone to do the household stuff (best case, split the load). They do not want to be solely responsible for household and kid stuff. Which is fine, I don't either, but the big question is why did they divorce then?

This. Women usually file for divorce…not men. 70% are initiated by the woman.

I keep hearing this stat on this board; is there a citation?

It is cited so many places

Honestly, men are more pragmatic when it comes to the prospect of divorce. They take time, perform a Benefit Cost Analysis and find the best scenario and will probably only pull the divorce trigger when most expeditious and cost-effective. Look at the lesbian divorce rate vs gay men if you want to some broader context. Why is it the way it is? Why such a stark contrast? Anyone?

I don’t have insight into every man, but when my exDH knew I was unhappy about his treatment of me and the kids and the imbalance within our family life, he waited until things were perfectly tipped in his favor to file. Spent down our shared assets, got a secret promotion, filed 2 weeks before the title and pay raise was official, and then pranced off into the sunset with a 7 figure salary and me making less than 1/10th of that.

The second he realized the balance of our relationship was permanently in his favor, he was done with it. He got what he needed- kids old enough to not need to be wiped or buckled in, childcare so he could build his career- and he was out.

Right?

Men are also a lot more likely to leave their wives if they have cancer.
I guess pp is right and men only file if it’s financially advantageous. Love apparently has little to do with why men marry.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m literally being told by the divorced dads: I want a family structure; I want another kid; I have money and can support a family.

Yeah, they do. They also want someone to do the household stuff (best case, split the load). They do not want to be solely responsible for household and kid stuff. Which is fine, I don't either, but the big question is why did they divorce then?

This. Women usually file for divorce…not men. 70% are initiated by the woman.

I keep hearing this stat on this board; is there a citation?

It is cited so many places

Honestly, men are more pragmatic when it comes to the prospect of divorce. They take time, perform a Benefit Cost Analysis and find the best scenario and will probably only pull the divorce trigger when most expeditious and cost-effective. Look at the lesbian divorce rate vs gay men if you want to some broader context. Why is it the way it is? Why such a stark contrast? Anyone?

Wrong. Most men are lazy to file.

They take the passive aggressive approach and continue to treat their wife and home like $hit until she’s finally cracks and files for divorce.

Voila! She’s the bad guy and he’s the poor victim.

And she does all the divorce paperwork/ women’s work.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It seems the harpies are still grumpy from the holidays…

I love how this thread can coexist right next to the “Are divorced men solely looking for sex?” thread and while the two are totally opposite in what they are griping about every harpy agrees that men are definitely always wrong…

You're a whole entire bi tch who sought out a mom's group to do the cyber equivalent of yanking a girl's ponytail for attention. You know you're a low value scrote. We know you're a low value scrote. To the corner with you.

So much anger in your post. A “low-value scrote”? Good Lord. Your ex is lucky he’s your ex! He’s probably on vacation in Thailand banging hot strange and having the time of his life on his own time. So much detectable hostile narcissism in your post.

And you're back again. Nothing says high value male like parking your stupid self at a computer reloading the page every ten seconds so you can argue with women all day. Sorry you're too broke to make it to Thailand.

Touche! Now we’re talkin’

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm married but I wouldn't want anyone's seconds they have all been rejected. Hard pass. If he can't make it work with his ex how is he going to make it work with you?

No kids, no responsibilities. Easy life.

Except that's not what's being discussed here they're all talking about having two kids then wanting more.

Who cares how many kids you have when you just ignore them all anyhow. Easy peasy. More the merrier. Someone else’s problem.