DMV Beauty Reality Check

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I remember in the 80’s when my Dad’s office started “casual Friday”. He wore khakis and a buttoned down Oxford. Now that’s considered being dressed up!

Yep. I think people have completely forgotten what business casual is sopped to be. Leggings aren’t pants.

This is like saying people have forgotten what "literally" means. You can shake your fist at changing cultural norms, but they are still going to change.

Oh, I agree and it’s not like I think khakis and button downs have to be a uniform. Times and fashions change. I just still think there should be SOME separation between work and workout clothes. But I’m probably a dinosaur because that “literally” thing makes me crazy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I remember in the 80’s when my Dad’s office started “casual Friday”. He wore khakis and a buttoned down Oxford. Now that’s considered being dressed up!

Yep. I think people have completely forgotten what business casual is sopped to be. Leggings aren’t pants.

It’s 2024; for better or worse—leggings are pants.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It's time for a reality check. Most people living in the DMV are not attractive. DC and Maryland are especially bad. If the standard scale is 1-10, DMV residents automatically lose 2 points, with NWDC and MD losing an extra point. There are many threads in which DCUMers self-rate themselves as 7/10 or above. Statistically speaking, you are multiplying the already small odds of being attractive with the even smaller odds of being attractive in the DMV. From here on out, let's agree to be honest and adjust our self-ratings.

Speak for yourself. I used a website called Pink Mirror when I was dating because I was curious if I was being too picky. My face is indeed a 7. I have other factors that probably push it up, if anything. Lots of wealthy women found this website because they were looking for a nanny. Wealthy people tend to be more attractive, because HNW people can have their pick. It’s not weird to me at all. I expect many of the women here to be better looking than me, sure to selection bias.

I just used it a got a 9.1 - thanks, it was fun.

Not pp. but it varies. I’ve gotten as high as 9.4 and as low as 7.8 depending upon makeup and pose/lighting.

This literally proves the point that investing in these things (makeup, beauty) helps!!

I already have high cheekbones, healthy long hair, soulful eyes, good proportions to chin, eyes, etc. but if I roll out of bed I’ll be less attractive than if I doll up. Any celebrity or actress in the wild would be less good looking without help.

I think there is a DMV type that looks good. But agree it’s not one who works. Sorry. Working tires you and unless you already have good bone structure you won’t be able to be at that level. That horrible lighting in offices does horrors to skin quality. I don’t live in the DMV but use to, agree people there are bland.

Couldn't agree more about the working. Even my husband has noticed this about women who work. He says they all have the same tired look and more wrinkles, and most are overweight.

Agree. But why do working women look better elsewhere? I’m specifically thinking of New York. Worked in banking there and the hours were no joke, but most of my females colleagues were fit, well-dressed, and some were downright beautiful (face). Here I know women who work in not nearly as stressful sectors and they are mostly homely and overweight, especially in the 30 and up demographic.

Because in more competitive professional environments like law, finance, consulting, competence is judged at least partially on how well a person is dressed and groomed. This doesn’t mean they need to look like a Kardashian, but they should at minimum look well groomed like a Kate Middleton or Michelle Obama. Clothes, hair, makeup. I’ll never fail to be shocked at the women who protest, “well I’m clean.“ Like damn, the bar is that low?!

Think back to the movie My Cousin Vinny. The lead is on trial for murder and is deeply worried when Danny DeVito comes in looking sloppy in an extremely dated, loud suit. Sure, DeVito eventually proves his competence in the end. But how many people are going to get that second chance at a first impression? Very few, especially women and especially women of color.

I’m a woman of color, so this hits really close to home. I’m already very much into beauty and fashion, so I make sure to present my myself nicely on a regular basis. I often don’t get a second crack at the first impression apple. And that’s even though I have a law degree from Harvard.

Thanks for the lecture on appearance, person old enough to reference “My Cousin Vinny” by telling us to “think back on it.” Um, that movie was from 1992. I was 3 years old.

NP. You know that someone being older than you is not a bad thing. Frankly your generation is all dying of cancer before you’re 45 so I wouldn’t be too smug.

Because your generation trashed the environment.

No, our generation started the clean up and taught your generation about the problem. We raised you to care like we do.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It's time for a reality check. Most people living in the DMV are not attractive. DC and Maryland are especially bad. If the standard scale is 1-10, DMV residents automatically lose 2 points, with NWDC and MD losing an extra point. There are many threads in which DCUMers self-rate themselves as 7/10 or above. Statistically speaking, you are multiplying the already small odds of being attractive with the even smaller odds of being attractive in the DMV. From here on out, let's agree to be honest and adjust our self-ratings.

Speak for yourself. I used a website called Pink Mirror when I was dating because I was curious if I was being too picky. My face is indeed a 7. I have other factors that probably push it up, if anything. Lots of wealthy women found this website because they were looking for a nanny. Wealthy people tend to be more attractive, because HNW people can have their pick. It’s not weird to me at all. I expect many of the women here to be better looking than me, sure to selection bias.

I just used it a got a 9.1 - thanks, it was fun.

Not pp. but it varies. I’ve gotten as high as 9.4 and as low as 7.8 depending upon makeup and pose/lighting.

This literally proves the point that investing in these things (makeup, beauty) helps!!

I already have high cheekbones, healthy long hair, soulful eyes, good proportions to chin, eyes, etc. but if I roll out of bed I’ll be less attractive than if I doll up. Any celebrity or actress in the wild would be less good looking without help.

I think there is a DMV type that looks good. But agree it’s not one who works. Sorry. Working tires you and unless you already have good bone structure you won’t be able to be at that level. That horrible lighting in offices does horrors to skin quality. I don’t live in the DMV but use to, agree people there are bland.

So what? I mean really why does this matter at all?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I remember in the 80’s when my Dad’s office started “casual Friday”. He wore khakis and a buttoned down Oxford. Now that’s considered being dressed up!

Yep. I think people have completely forgotten what business casual is sopped to be. Leggings aren’t pants.

It’s 2024; for better or worse—leggings are pants.

But do you think they’re appropriate for the office?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I remember in the 80’s when my Dad’s office started “casual Friday”. He wore khakis and a buttoned down Oxford. Now that’s considered being dressed up!

Yep. I think people have completely forgotten what business casual is sopped to be. Leggings aren’t pants.

It’s 2024; for better or worse—leggings are pants.

But do you think they’re appropriate for the office?

There are leggings that are thick, opaque, cut much more like regular pants, and not obviously leggings. There are leggings that are transparent and very tight. Where on that spectrum is office-appropriate depends on the office. And in some offices, none are, but those are the same offices where a lot of regular pants wouldn't be appropriate, either.

[Anonymous]

“Not pp. but it varies. I’ve gotten as high as 9.4 and as low as 7.8 depending upon makeup and pose/lighting.”


To the above-who, when did someone actually rate you?? And why so specific. 7.8?! This is bizarre!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It's time for a reality check. Most people living in the DMV are not attractive. DC and Maryland are especially bad. If the standard scale is 1-10, DMV residents automatically lose 2 points, with NWDC and MD losing an extra point. There are many threads in which DCUMers self-rate themselves as 7/10 or above. Statistically speaking, you are multiplying the already small odds of being attractive with the even smaller odds of being attractive in the DMV. From here on out, let's agree to be honest and adjust our self-ratings.

Speak for yourself. I used a website called Pink Mirror when I was dating because I was curious if I was being too picky. My face is indeed a 7. I have other factors that probably push it up, if anything. Lots of wealthy women found this website because they were looking for a nanny. Wealthy people tend to be more attractive, because HNW people can have their pick. It’s not weird to me at all. I expect many of the women here to be better looking than me, sure to selection bias.

I just used it a got a 9.1 - thanks, it was fun.

Not pp. but it varies. I’ve gotten as high as 9.4 and as low as 7.8 depending upon makeup and pose/lighting.

This literally proves the point that investing in these things (makeup, beauty) helps!!

I already have high cheekbones, healthy long hair, soulful eyes, good proportions to chin, eyes, etc. but if I roll out of bed I’ll be less attractive than if I doll up. Any celebrity or actress in the wild would be less good looking without help.

I think there is a DMV type that looks good. But agree it’s not one who works. Sorry. Working tires you and unless you already have good bone structure you won’t be able to be at that level. That horrible lighting in offices does horrors to skin quality. I don’t live in the DMV but use to, agree people there are bland.

Couldn't agree more about the working. Even my husband has noticed this about women who work. He says they all have the same tired look and more wrinkles, and most are overweight.

Agree. But why do working women look better elsewhere? I’m specifically thinking of New York. Worked in banking there and the hours were no joke, but most of my females colleagues were fit, well-dressed, and some were downright beautiful (face). Here I know women who work in not nearly as stressful sectors and they are mostly homely and overweight, especially in the 30 and up demographic.

Because in more competitive professional environments like law, finance, consulting, competence is judged at least partially on how well a person is dressed and groomed. This doesn’t mean they need to look like a Kardashian, but they should at minimum look well groomed like a Kate Middleton or Michelle Obama. Clothes, hair, makeup. I’ll never fail to be shocked at the women who protest, “well I’m clean.“ Like damn, the bar is that low?!

Think back to the movie My Cousin Vinny. The lead is on trial for murder and is deeply worried when Danny DeVito comes in looking sloppy in an extremely dated, loud suit. Sure, DeVito eventually proves his competence in the end. But how many people are going to get that second chance at a first impression? Very few, especially women and especially women of color.

I’m a woman of color, so this hits really close to home. I’m already very much into beauty and fashion, so I make sure to present my myself nicely on a regular basis. I often don’t get a second crack at the first impression apple. And that’s even though I have a law degree from Harvard.

Agreed. I think it is absolutely a kind of white privilege to be able to go into a store as an adult wearing pajama bottoms without getting followed around bc they think you are a shoplifter. You have to do more social signaling with your appearance as a nonwhite person to get the same default respect. I therefore prefer settings where the norm is to put some effort in so it feels less racial to me.

I am a WOC (Middle Eastern, not Latina), and if I go anywhere and I do not look polished and pretty, people automatically speak to me in Spanish. I have nothing against Spanish but I do not speak the language.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It's time for a reality check. Most people living in the DMV are not attractive. DC and Maryland are especially bad. If the standard scale is 1-10, DMV residents automatically lose 2 points, with NWDC and MD losing an extra point. There are many threads in which DCUMers self-rate themselves as 7/10 or above. Statistically speaking, you are multiplying the already small odds of being attractive with the even smaller odds of being attractive in the DMV. From here on out, let's agree to be honest and adjust our self-ratings.

Speak for yourself. I used a website called Pink Mirror when I was dating because I was curious if I was being too picky. My face is indeed a 7. I have other factors that probably push it up, if anything. Lots of wealthy women found this website because they were looking for a nanny. Wealthy people tend to be more attractive, because HNW people can have their pick. It’s not weird to me at all. I expect many of the women here to be better looking than me, sure to selection bias.

I just used it a got a 9.1 - thanks, it was fun.

Not pp. but it varies. I’ve gotten as high as 9.4 and as low as 7.8 depending upon makeup and pose/lighting.

This literally proves the point that investing in these things (makeup, beauty) helps!!

I already have high cheekbones, healthy long hair, soulful eyes, good proportions to chin, eyes, etc. but if I roll out of bed I’ll be less attractive than if I doll up. Any celebrity or actress in the wild would be less good looking without help.

I think there is a DMV type that looks good. But agree it’s not one who works. Sorry. Working tires you and unless you already have good bone structure you won’t be able to be at that level. That horrible lighting in offices does horrors to skin quality. I don’t live in the DMV but use to, agree people there are bland.

Couldn't agree more about the working. Even my husband has noticed this about women who work. He says they all have the same tired look and more wrinkles, and most are overweight.

Agree. But why do working women look better elsewhere? I’m specifically thinking of New York. Worked in banking there and the hours were no joke, but most of my females colleagues were fit, well-dressed, and some were downright beautiful (face). Here I know women who work in not nearly as stressful sectors and they are mostly homely and overweight, especially in the 30 and up demographic.

Because in more competitive professional environments like law, finance, consulting, competence is judged at least partially on how well a person is dressed and groomed. This doesn’t mean they need to look like a Kardashian, but they should at minimum look well groomed like a Kate Middleton or Michelle Obama. Clothes, hair, makeup. I’ll never fail to be shocked at the women who protest, “well I’m clean.“ Like damn, the bar is that low?!

Think back to the movie My Cousin Vinny. The lead is on trial for murder and is deeply worried when Danny DeVito comes in looking sloppy in an extremely dated, loud suit. Sure, DeVito eventually proves his competence in the end. But how many people are going to get that second chance at a first impression? Very few, especially women and especially women of color.

I’m a woman of color, so this hits really close to home. I’m already very much into beauty and fashion, so I make sure to present my myself nicely on a regular basis. I often don’t get a second crack at the first impression apple. And that’s even though I have a law degree from Harvard.

Agreed. I think it is absolutely a kind of white privilege to be able to go into a store as an adult wearing pajama bottoms without getting followed around bc they think you are a shoplifter. You have to do more social signaling with your appearance as a nonwhite person to get the same default respect. I therefore prefer settings where the norm is to put some effort in so it feels less racial to me.

I am a WOC (Middle Eastern, not Latina), and if I go anywhere and I do not look polished and pretty, people automatically speak to me in Spanish. I have nothing against Spanish but I do not speak the language.

How is Spanish-speakers speaking to you in Spanish like being followed around because someone thinks you're shoplifting?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It's time for a reality check. Most people living in the DMV are not attractive. DC and Maryland are especially bad. If the standard scale is 1-10, DMV residents automatically lose 2 points, with NWDC and MD losing an extra point. There are many threads in which DCUMers self-rate themselves as 7/10 or above. Statistically speaking, you are multiplying the already small odds of being attractive with the even smaller odds of being attractive in the DMV. From here on out, let's agree to be honest and adjust our self-ratings.

Speak for yourself. I used a website called Pink Mirror when I was dating because I was curious if I was being too picky. My face is indeed a 7. I have other factors that probably push it up, if anything. Lots of wealthy women found this website because they were looking for a nanny. Wealthy people tend to be more attractive, because HNW people can have their pick. It’s not weird to me at all. I expect many of the women here to be better looking than me, sure to selection bias.

I just used it a got a 9.1 - thanks, it was fun.

Not pp. but it varies. I’ve gotten as high as 9.4 and as low as 7.8 depending upon makeup and pose/lighting.

This literally proves the point that investing in these things (makeup, beauty) helps!!

I already have high cheekbones, healthy long hair, soulful eyes, good proportions to chin, eyes, etc. but if I roll out of bed I’ll be less attractive than if I doll up. Any celebrity or actress in the wild would be less good looking without help.

I think there is a DMV type that looks good. But agree it’s not one who works. Sorry. Working tires you and unless you already have good bone structure you won’t be able to be at that level. That horrible lighting in offices does horrors to skin quality. I don’t live in the DMV but use to, agree people there are bland.

Couldn't agree more about the working. Even my husband has noticed this about women who work. He says they all have the same tired look and more wrinkles, and most are overweight.

Agree. But why do working women look better elsewhere? I’m specifically thinking of New York. Worked in banking there and the hours were no joke, but most of my females colleagues were fit, well-dressed, and some were downright beautiful (face). Here I know women who work in not nearly as stressful sectors and they are mostly homely and overweight, especially in the 30 and up demographic.

Because in more competitive professional environments like law, finance, consulting, competence is judged at least partially on how well a person is dressed and groomed. This doesn’t mean they need to look like a Kardashian, but they should at minimum look well groomed like a Kate Middleton or Michelle Obama. Clothes, hair, makeup. I’ll never fail to be shocked at the women who protest, “well I’m clean.“ Like damn, the bar is that low?!

Think back to the movie My Cousin Vinny. The lead is on trial for murder and is deeply worried when Danny DeVito comes in looking sloppy in an extremely dated, loud suit. Sure, DeVito eventually proves his competence in the end. But how many people are going to get that second chance at a first impression? Very few, especially women and especially women of color.

I’m a woman of color, so this hits really close to home. I’m already very much into beauty and fashion, so I make sure to present my myself nicely on a regular basis. I often don’t get a second crack at the first impression apple. And that’s even though I have a law degree from Harvard.

Agreed. I think it is absolutely a kind of white privilege to be able to go into a store as an adult wearing pajama bottoms without getting followed around bc they think you are a shoplifter. You have to do more social signaling with your appearance as a nonwhite person to get the same default respect. I therefore prefer settings where the norm is to put some effort in so it feels less racial to me.

I am a WOC (Middle Eastern, not Latina), and if I go anywhere and I do not look polished and pretty, people automatically speak to me in Spanish. I have nothing against Spanish but I do not speak the language.

How is Spanish-speakers speaking to you in Spanish like being followed around because someone thinks you're shoplifting?

Oh it’s not just Spanish speakers. That would be understandable. It’s everyone. Plain old white people assume I can’t speak English and immediately try to communicate with me in Spanish.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I just attended a prestigious national panel discussion in DC. The three women on the panel were think tankers and academics. None of them had done a thing with their hair and had no makeup on. Yet, they were so badass, so brilliant, so warm yet in complete command of the subject matter and the discussion. I was in awe. They were not unattractive either.

No one except other nerd women are impressed

Absolutely not true. I’m a skin and beauty junkie and whenever I hear women of this caliber talk about foreign policy, science, etc. I’m like - WOW. To have a mind that works like that, that’s incredible.