Is W&M bro-y?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It’s giving me quirky vibes not bro vibes

My impression from years ago and my kid's now is that it's very, very generic people who want a condo then a townhouse then a single family home in Vienna or certainly NoVa and then to have 2.2 kids and a dog, and talk about the commute and taxes and the weather.

Sounds like you're not very perceptive IMO.

Not generally, but maybe in this case. I can say I remember being insanely bored and unimpressed, but then again I was 18, had already been admitted to schools that vastly outranked W&M, and this was 30 years ago.

OMG. What a douche.

Right now my kid has WM Monroe, UVA, Hopkins and an Ivy. Likely will end up WM and, boy oh boy, do you and your stupid kid have some stupid ideas.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It’s giving me quirky vibes not bro vibes

My impression from years ago and my kid's now is that it's very, very generic people who want a condo then a townhouse then a single family home in Vienna or certainly NoVa and then to have 2.2 kids and a dog, and talk about the commute and taxes and the weather.

Sounds like you're not very perceptive IMO.

Not generally, but maybe in this case. I can say I remember being insanely bored and unimpressed, but then again I was 18, had already been admitted to schools that vastly outranked W&M, and this was 30 years ago.

OMG. What a douche.

Right now my kid has WM Monroe, UVA, Hopkins and an Ivy. Likely will end up WM and, boy oh boy, do you and your stupid kid have some stupid ideas.

NP- you seem like just as big a douche.

[Anonymous]

Look, my impression, MY STEREOTYPE, is that it's a school with very small aspirations. I was offered an insane amount of money, including fancy scholarships only awarded to several people, and wanted to like it -- I just didn't. And I think the reason was in part because the people seemed really... flat. Not particularly charasmatic or engaged. Now again, that is an impression of an 18 year old, but it was so strong at the time, and I found it fascinating that kid (who is much less smug than me) seemed to think the same. I am sure your impression that is because douchbags raise douchbags, and I would be, as a douchbag, the least able to recognize that. But please know I am not saying you have a terrible child, but more that it was my impression from a superficial visit as a teenager and remains somewhat so, if we are going to generalize.

[Anonymous]

and by aspirations, I meant kids who wanted to have big horizons in this world - not make money or win prestigious prizes, but become people who had broad and interesting world views and experiences however they defined those for themselves.
Since we are talking about impressions, mine was that it was rather vanilla, overall, as a culture. That doesn't mean I am a bad person to not think it's a place that felt engaging to me.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Look, my impression, MY STEREOTYPE, is that it's a school with very small aspirations. I was offered an insane amount of money, including fancy scholarships only awarded to several people, and wanted to like it -- I just didn't. And I think the reason was in part because the people seemed really... flat. Not particularly charasmatic or engaged. Now again, that is an impression of an 18 year old, but it was so strong at the time, and I found it fascinating that kid (who is much less smug than me) seemed to think the same. I am sure your impression that is because douchbags raise douchbags, and I would be, as a douchbag, the least able to recognize that. But please know I am not saying you have a terrible child, but more that it was my impression from a superficial visit as a teenager and remains somewhat so, if we are going to generalize.

Of all the criticisms I've heard of W&M this is definitely a new one and actually goes against some people's complaints - that they thought people were too friendly or the culture was too intense for example

[Anonymous]

^ that is interesting. Part of me would love for my kid to go there if she could get in; it's in-state and clearly has a good reputation. Although I wouldn't say what I am steroetyping goes against what you are saying people's complaints are... I think the friendliness can be from boring people and the intensity can also be from boring people (and before people jump down my throat, again, that is my STEREOTYPE)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:^ that is interesting. Part of me would love for my kid to go there if she could get in; it's in-state and clearly has a good reputation. Although I wouldn't say what I am steroetyping goes against what you are saying people's complaints are... I think the friendliness can be from boring people and the intensity can also be from boring people (and before people jump down my throat, again, that is my STEREOTYPE)

Truth. We have a daughter there who is pretty happy in general with the school vibe and more specifically with her professors.
Nice campus in a beautiful area. And it sounds like the guys are generally decent.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Look, my impression, MY STEREOTYPE, is that it's a school with very small aspirations. I was offered an insane amount of money, including fancy scholarships only awarded to several people, and wanted to like it -- I just didn't. And I think the reason was in part because the people seemed really... flat. Not particularly charasmatic or engaged. Now again, that is an impression of an 18 year old, but it was so strong at the time, and I found it fascinating that kid (who is much less smug than me) seemed to think the same. I am sure your impression that is because douchbags raise douchbags, and I would be, as a douchbag, the least able to recognize that. But please know I am not saying you have a terrible child, but more that it was my impression from a superficial visit as a teenager and remains somewhat so, if we are going to generalize.

You are certainly entitled to your opinion, as is your son. Fortunately, it sounds as neither you nor the WM student body lost anything by your deciding to go elsewhere.

[Anonymous]

*as if*

[Anonymous]

Culture at W&M is very much bro-centric and is kinda date-rapey.

Avoid.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:and by aspirations, I meant kids who wanted to have big horizons in this world - not make money or win prestigious prizes, but become people who had broad and interesting world views and experiences however they defined those for themselves.
Since we are talking about impressions, mine was that it was rather vanilla, overall, as a culture. That doesn't mean I am a bad person to not think it's a place that felt engaging to me.

Okay, I’ll bite. Please share with everyone the name of the college that you decided WAS worthy of your extraordinary aspirations. Where did you go?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Culture at W&M is very much bro-centric and is kinda date-rapey.

Avoid.

Yikes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:and by aspirations, I meant kids who wanted to have big horizons in this world - not make money or win prestigious prizes, but become people who had broad and interesting world views and experiences however they defined those for themselves.
Since we are talking about impressions, mine was that it was rather vanilla, overall, as a culture. That doesn't mean I am a bad person to not think it's a place that felt engaging to me.

Okay, I’ll bite. Please share with everyone the name of the college that you decided WAS worthy of your extraordinary aspirations. Where did you go?

Probably NEU

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:and by aspirations, I meant kids who wanted to have big horizons in this world - not make money or win prestigious prizes, but become people who had broad and interesting world views and experiences however they defined those for themselves.
Since we are talking about impressions, mine was that it was rather vanilla, overall, as a culture. That doesn't mean I am a bad person to not think it's a place that felt engaging to me.

I don't think you're a "bad person," but I still hold my original impression that you may not be perceptive to nuance and may not be great at seeing outside yourself. This isn't about whether you/your kid found WM engaging, but how you talk about people/culture. I hear echoes of a script from a bad 80s teen movie: the misunderstood teen who feels more creative than generic people with their 2.2 kids. Sounded like something I would have said as a 13 year old punk rock kid (and by 18 would have been embarrassed by how ham-fisted and cliché it sounded). Writing "generic people" and "rather vanilla" doesn't trigger for me an impression of someone who has broad and interesting worldviews and can recognize them in others. Rather it's a red flag to watch out for a cheesy type who fancies themselves more interesting than everyone else. My bias of course. And you're responding to a thread titled "Is W&M bro-y?" so there's that too.

My DH does short form documentary filmmaking for his work so he's used to quickly getting a sense of place and generating open-ended conversations with various people, and so sort of approached college visits that way. We found WM to have a really interesting culture. Students seem outwardly to be more stylistically and politically moderate compared to some of the other schools we visited and Greek life/party culture was also sort of moderate--not absent like some LACs, but not very dominant like others. But every conversation with a student/group of students held surprises. We were struck by how articulate, broad-minded but diverse students were in their thinking whether they were talking about college life, marine science, international relations, fashion, academics, music --whatever. As a group, compared to other schools of similar academic caliber, they had distinctive insights--but seemed less certain and more flexible and open in their thinking and views. They seemed very aware and curious about the world. I personally value this combination highly and wondered what the school did to cultivate it.

Tldr: our impression of WM was not "bro-y" nor "rather vanilla" but an interesting, open-minded place.

[Anonymous]

Aren't like 30-50% of college age males bros? I thin they are everywhere and the way that they are will end up dominating most schools in a way that seems like all the guys there are bros. But every school has plenty of non-bros, too.