Gay-Friendly Schools That Are Not Super-Woke?

[Anonymous]

My son is at a school with a DEI office, kindness initiatives, and a place who makes space for special populations and will go to bat for their students. But the families are definitely more centrist to conservative.

That said, my kid is in 9th grade and I've been disappointed in some of the things I've heard him suggest about gay people. We're a progressive (albeit traditional) family. We've had gay couple friends through the years and have included our children in those relationships. I'm not sure where these opinions are coming from outside of peer influence (or freaking social media). If my kid has a friend who is struggling with their sexual identity, or a gay peer, my kid and his friends would not be an accepting group for that student.

I say this to you because you might think you want to avoid "woke" schools, but if those places have cohorts who are genuinely supportive of your kid, isn't that preferred to a cohort of kids who might tolerate your kid to their face, but at best keep them at arms length and not befriend them?

PS. For anyone who is worried about our kid, we're super unhappy with his views at the moment and are working on it. We think part of this is due to being 14 years old, but some of it is definitely coming from "anti-woke" peer influence.

[Anonymous]

SSFS does a pretty good job being respectful of everyone, including gay kids and conservative parents.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm looking for a gay-friendly school for my 8th grade son. Our family is not politically left-wing, and I don't want my son in a school where they teach about 100 different gender identities, "white fragility", and other associated stuff. I am fine with who he is, but I don't want him making his sexuality his entire personality.

Are there moderate schools that will be accepting of a gay child but aren't hyper-left wing on cultural issues? We just need him to be supported and respected. We aren't looking for much more.

You don't want him making his sexuality his entire personality? Sorry, but you don't get to choose.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My son is at a school with a DEI office, kindness initiatives, and a place who makes space for special populations and will go to bat for their students. But the families are definitely more centrist to conservative.

That said, my kid is in 9th grade and I've been disappointed in some of the things I've heard him suggest about gay people. We're a progressive (albeit traditional) family. We've had gay couple friends through the years and have included our children in those relationships. I'm not sure where these opinions are coming from outside of peer influence (or freaking social media). If my kid has a friend who is struggling with their sexual identity, or a gay peer, my kid and his friends would not be an accepting group for that student.

I say this to you because you might think you want to avoid "woke" schools, but if those places have cohorts who are genuinely supportive of your kid, isn't that preferred to a cohort of kids who might tolerate your kid to their face, but at best keep them at arms length and not befriend them?

PS. For anyone who is worried about our kid, we're super unhappy with his views at the moment and are working on it. We think part of this is due to being 14 years old, but some of it is definitely coming from "anti-woke" peer influence.

Your post is honest and thoughtful, and is proof that "woke" or "progressive" does not correlate to kind and openminded. One my my problems with the DEI culture is that mean snarky kids (which almost all adolescents are, to some degree) use the whole thing as a game just to get each other in trouble.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So gay-friendly enough to accept your kid, but not “so woke” that other gay kids are accepted.

Got it.

This.

OP wants a unicorn.

to some people, there is a difference between a person who happens to be gay and just wants to go to school and be himself/herself, as opposed to people who want to make a political statement by forcing drag queen story hour and cross-over bathrooms. people in the first category may be MORE offended by people in the second category than a straight person would be.

you can mock the OP all you like, but I get what she is asking and I think it is a valid question.

Nobody is being forced to take their children to Drag Queen story hour. Nobody is forced to use an all gender toilet — assuming that’s what you mean by “cross-over.” Your binary views of the LGBTQ community are just bizarre. Turn off Fox News and touch grass.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My gay friends (in their 50’s) find the current leftist gender identity stuff maddening. They are both rather conservative, upper class, and find discussing sexual preference at work or in public to be distasteful.

If any of this resonates with OP, I’d look at one of the more traditional boys schools. Sexuality is a private matter. -I’m leaving the thread now!

My gay son finds people like your friends, with their “rights for me but not for thee” view of queer identity to be maddening.

Sexuality is emphatically not a private matter when 29% of trans youth have attempted suicide due to bullying.

Here’s an idea — instead of trying to silence the people pointing out oppression, maybe work on stopping the oppression?

Please stop, seriously.

I won’t stop advocating against the current overwhelming rise in anti-LGBTQ hate and violence. How about you stop advocating for silence in the face of that hate and violence?

I wasn't aware that there is currently an overwhelming rise in anti-LGBTQ hate and violence. without attacking me for asking the question, can you explain what you mean?

There is, in Afghanistan

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My gay friends (in their 50’s) find the current leftist gender identity stuff maddening. They are both rather conservative, upper class, and find discussing sexual preference at work or in public to be distasteful.

If any of this resonates with OP, I’d look at one of the more traditional boys schools. Sexuality is a private matter. -I’m leaving the thread now!

My gay son finds people like your friends, with their “rights for me but not for thee” view of queer identity to be maddening.

Sexuality is emphatically not a private matter when 29% of trans youth have attempted suicide due to bullying.

Here’s an idea — instead of trying to silence the people pointing out oppression, maybe work on stopping the oppression?

Please stop, seriously.

I won’t stop advocating against the current overwhelming rise in anti-LGBTQ hate and violence. How about you stop advocating for silence in the face of that hate and violence?

I wasn't aware that there is currently an overwhelming rise in anti-LGBTQ hate and violence. without attacking me for asking the question, can you explain what you mean?

There is, in Afghanistan

NOPE right here in Amerikkka

https://www.nytimes.com/2023/06/22/us/politics/anti-lgbtq-report-adl-glaad.html

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm looking for a gay-friendly school for my 8th grade son. Our family is not politically left-wing, and I don't want my son in a school where they teach about 100 different gender identities, "white fragility", and other associated stuff. I am fine with who he is, but I don't want him making his sexuality his entire personality.

Are there moderate schools that will be accepting of a gay child but aren't hyper-left wing on cultural issues? We just need him to be supported and respected. We aren't looking for much more.

So you just want a school that will accept gay kids but not any other marginalized group? OK, got it. GL having a relationship with your child in the future

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So gay-friendly enough to accept your kid, but not “so woke” that other gay kids are accepted.

Got it.

+1

Yep. *Only when it applies to me and my family* Horse s__t.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
Is oxymoron, no?

No.

Yes. Oxymoron.

[Anonymous]

Op, I Will actually answer your question.

Bullis, St. Andrews, SSSA, St. John's, Potomac, St. Alban's, Flint Hill.

[Anonymous]

If you are Jewish, any of the non-Orthodox Jewish day schools.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Op, I Will actually answer your question.

Bullis, St. Andrews, SSSA, St. John's, Potomac, St. Alban's, Flint Hill.

Not SSSAS. We have a lot of nonbinary students and are openly welcoming of trans students and anyone of any gender they choose. It’s an extremely supportive school for ALL. Families who want to support only the LGB and not the TIA+ might not be too comfortable here.