Agree or disagree? Kids should only play travel sports if they have college or pro potential

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:B team, baby! More local travel, fewer crazy parents. Still a good experience for many kids. Some of them will grow into wonderful high school and college athletes; some will tap out in 7th grade. It's all fine. Whatever each family decides.

Yes! We love our DD's B team!

Another vote for DD's softball B team. We travel occasionally out of state or to Richmond for a weekend -- mostly because the girls enjoy hanging out together, and since many go to different high schools they don't see each other that frequently outside of practices. Also to compete against different teams -- we often see the same teams in our division and it gets boring. She loves those girls and the parents are great as well.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:While I have always admired highly athletic kids and wish them the best, I am just so glad that mine never fell into that category. The commitment required for travel sports sounds exhausting, and many of the parents seem insufferable. And for what? The vast majority of the kids end up putting the sport largely behind them, more often than not before college. I just don't get the appeal.

I don’t understand why people care so much about what other kids do. But I’ll bite..our kids enjoyed travel sports because they loved their sport, got frustrated in rec when kids missed games and practice at the drop of a hat, liked the competitive nature and overall higher skill and commitment levels in travel. None of them had any interest or desire to play in college. But they made great friends, stayed fit, and had great time management skills which served them well in high school and college.

Why isn’t the same disdain shown to non athletic extracurriculars? It gets old.

I wouldn't say I have disdain for travel sports or other highly competitive expensive exracurriculars, but I would never let my child do them. Money aside, these activities are intense abd really don't allow kids to be kids and have a childhood. I don't want my child so busy that they do not have time for much else.

So if your kid developed a particular passion that they loved enough to put the time in to improve, be it music or sports or whatever, you'd discourage it?

Possibly, but its not like im putting a blanket ban on all activities or sometjing.. I'm not 100% sure. Do you really let your kids do whatever they wabt? No limitations anywhere? I think travel or high competitive activities are way too expensive and a time suck, not just for me, but for my kids. Like I said, I think for kids 14 and under free time and free play ate very important.

14 is too late to jump on the competitive sports bandwagon. If you wait that long, it's long over.

Then it's over. I'll listen to my kid and discuss things with them, but at the end of the day kids don't get to do everything they want.

It's also going to be fun because all of that "free time" will be spent on devices. Do you think 14 year olds are playing at the park?

Why not? 14 and under are kids. I absolutely expect then to be kids, what wrong with that? Devices arent big at my house, so that's a non issue

You sound very naive. Keep telling yourself your 14 year old is so different from any other kid that age and won’t want to sit around playing on a phone or on video games. That is what “hanging out” turns into. Your influence on your kids will wane and peer influences will become very important in adolescence. That’s how development works.

um ok.. I was 14 and I know what I was like. Yes, it's different with all the tech now, bit all of that is controllable. Quit assuming all 14 year olds are all the same. All I wanted to do at that age was be a kid.

I’m beginning to think you are a troll. Either that or a stupendously unaware parent.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I see some parents are comparing travel sports to other non-sport extracurriculars. Can someone share what non-sport extracurricular activities cost as much as travel sports, requires as much time from the parents, and puts as much stress on kids' bodies?

I have a kid who did children’s theater for years and a kid who did travel soccer and theater was a lot worse. Parents were nastier, rehearsal schedules much more intense than the travel soccer, and the parent volunteer stagehand requirements were far more than anything I saw in travel soccer. Cost was about equivalent.

Where?

I have a kid who has done several community theater productions and not my experience at all. There is no fee to participate. You can donate but it's sincerely not required. Rehearsal schedules are intense for tech weeks and during performance time. That's a couple weeks. And couldn't find a less nasty group of people What is there to be nasty about? Are people heckling during the performances? Pretty minimal volunteer requirements too. Typically kids do all of the stagehand and crew work. The tech crew kids are a whole other thing in theater from the performers and a lot of kids do this.

Youth theater company. Cost-wise, about the same cost as travel soccer. I think recreational community theater is more like rec sports, so you might not have encountered the same thing. The nastiness was based on kids looks, which was horrifying to hear. We were expected to put a lot of time into set volunteering and backstage management, far more than I did with travel soccer.

That having been said, my friend with a kid in a competitive ballet academy puts my theater stories to shame. OMG. Ballet parents are vicious.

What is a youth theater company? Did your kid get a paycheck?

It’s a company that puts on youth theater for its business, except it’s a nonprofit. Of course my kid didn’t get a paycheck. We paid a ridiculous amount of money for DC to be in play productions, as did everyone else.

Surely this is not a new thing to you if your kids do theater? Youth theater companies are common.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:While I have always admired highly athletic kids and wish them the best, I am just so glad that mine never fell into that category. The commitment required for travel sports sounds exhausting, and many of the parents seem insufferable. And for what? The vast majority of the kids end up putting the sport largely behind them, more often than not before college. I just don't get the appeal.

I don’t understand why people care so much about what other kids do. But I’ll bite..our kids enjoyed travel sports because they loved their sport, got frustrated in rec when kids missed games and practice at the drop of a hat, liked the competitive nature and overall higher skill and commitment levels in travel. None of them had any interest or desire to play in college. But they made great friends, stayed fit, and had great time management skills which served them well in high school and college.

Why isn’t the same disdain shown to non athletic extracurriculars? It gets old.

I wouldn't say I have disdain for travel sports or other highly competitive expensive exracurriculars, but I would never let my child do them. Money aside, these activities are intense abd really don't allow kids to be kids and have a childhood. I don't want my child so busy that they do not have time for much else.

So if your kid developed a particular passion that they loved enough to put the time in to improve, be it music or sports or whatever, you'd discourage it?

Possibly, but its not like im putting a blanket ban on all activities or sometjing.. I'm not 100% sure. Do you really let your kids do whatever they wabt? No limitations anywhere? I think travel or high competitive activities are way too expensive and a time suck, not just for me, but for my kids. Like I said, I think for kids 14 and under free time and free play ate very important.

You are wrong to assume that travel sports don't leave time for plenty of free play. Kids on our block do travel hockey, soccer, and competitive swimming, and still spend a ton of time roaming the neighborhood, playing with friends, just goofing around. My kids also have LOTS of time for relaxing, reading, etc. And they also do other things like music. Our family has time to hike, camp, visit family, etc. And competitive sports are a natural part of childhood, just like free play. Kids get to challenge themselves, make great friends, and goof around with their teammates.

Any kid that I've ever know in a travel sport or activity is always super busy. That's the draw for some parents is too keep their kids busy.

Weird, we’ve had a totally different experiences. But anyway, we’re having a blast, kids and adults alike, so that’s what counts!

[Anonymous]

I think too many people jump to travel too quickly. Some parents lack an understanding of their kids ability and potential. They maybe good on rec but that doesn’t mean they are good enough for a top travel team. Thus we have mid and lower level travel teams mad up of kids that really should be playing rec which in turn would make rec more competitive and fewer kids would leave for travel.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:Our kids play travel sports because DH and I both played travel sports then a college sport, so for us it is just a lifestyle that we love and are comfortable with spending our time and money to support. Ironically, our youngest son chose about the only 2 sports that neither of us played growing up (ice hockey and lacrosse), so we're having fun learning along the way, but the level of athleticism and parental commitment required is the same across most sports (though hockey is really expensive). Older kids played travel sports then D1 and D3 athletics (no scholarship for either). Wouldn't change it for the world. We just love sports.

Translation: we like it, so we forced it on our kids.

Yes, this. Because kids can't have a childhood or be functional adults without all of these extras.

Exactly. I love how the poster says her youngest chose a sport "neither of us played growing up." What she really means is: we made clear to the kids that they had to pick at least one sport to participate in and didn't give them a choice in the matter because that's how important we think playing a sport is. Because we all know that that is exactly what happened.

Kids who do sports when they are young learn the value of moving their bodies for the fun of it and it carries over into adulthood. Most people I know who didn't do any sports as kids are frumpy in their middle age. I'm guessing you're one of them. Have fun enjoying the health problems that come with being sedentary. I'm sure you'll lie here and say you exercise every day. I call BS.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:While I have always admired highly athletic kids and wish them the best, I am just so glad that mine never fell into that category. The commitment required for travel sports sounds exhausting, and many of the parents seem insufferable. And for what? The vast majority of the kids end up putting the sport largely behind them, more often than not before college. I just don't get the appeal.

I don’t understand why people care so much about what other kids do. But I’ll bite..our kids enjoyed travel sports because they loved their sport, got frustrated in rec when kids missed games and practice at the drop of a hat, liked the competitive nature and overall higher skill and commitment levels in travel. None of them had any interest or desire to play in college. But they made great friends, stayed fit, and had great time management skills which served them well in high school and college.

Why isn’t the same disdain shown to non athletic extracurriculars? It gets old.

I wouldn't say I have disdain for travel sports or other highly competitive expensive exracurriculars, but I would never let my child do them. Money aside, these activities are intense abd really don't allow kids to be kids and have a childhood. I don't want my child so busy that they do not have time for much else.

So if your kid developed a particular passion that they loved enough to put the time in to improve, be it music or sports or whatever, you'd discourage it?

Possibly, but its not like im putting a blanket ban on all activities or sometjing.. I'm not 100% sure. Do you really let your kids do whatever they wabt? No limitations anywhere? I think travel or high competitive activities are way too expensive and a time suck, not just for me, but for my kids. Like I said, I think for kids 14 and under free time and free play ate very important.

14 is too late to jump on the competitive sports bandwagon. If you wait that long, it's long over.

Then it's over. I'll listen to my kid and discuss things with them, but at the end of the day kids don't get to do everything they want.

It's also going to be fun because all of that "free time" will be spent on devices. Do you think 14 year olds are playing at the park?

Why not? 14 and under are kids. I absolutely expect then to be kids, what wrong with that? Devices arent big at my house, so that's a non issue

You sound very naive. Keep telling yourself your 14 year old is so different from any other kid that age and won’t want to sit around playing on a phone or on video games. That is what “hanging out” turns into. Your influence on your kids will wane and peer influences will become very important in adolescence. That’s how development works.

um ok.. I was 14 and I know what I was like. Yes, it's different with all the tech now, bit all of that is controllable. Quit assuming all 14 year olds are all the same. All I wanted to do at that age was be a kid.

I’m beginning to think you are a troll. Either that or a stupendously unaware parent.

Definitely a troll with nothing better to do than get a bunch of parents riled up. Such a pointless thread.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:While I have always admired highly athletic kids and wish them the best, I am just so glad that mine never fell into that category. The commitment required for travel sports sounds exhausting, and many of the parents seem insufferable. And for what? The vast majority of the kids end up putting the sport largely behind them, more often than not before college. I just don't get the appeal.

I don’t understand why people care so much about what other kids do. But I’ll bite..our kids enjoyed travel sports because they loved their sport, got frustrated in rec when kids missed games and practice at the drop of a hat, liked the competitive nature and overall higher skill and commitment levels in travel. None of them had any interest or desire to play in college. But they made great friends, stayed fit, and had great time management skills which served them well in high school and college.

Why isn’t the same disdain shown to non athletic extracurriculars? It gets old.

I wouldn't say I have disdain for travel sports or other highly competitive expensive exracurriculars, but I would never let my child do them. Money aside, these activities are intense abd really don't allow kids to be kids and have a childhood. I don't want my child so busy that they do not have time for much else.

So if your kid developed a particular passion that they loved enough to put the time in to improve, be it music or sports or whatever, you'd discourage it?

Possibly, but its not like im putting a blanket ban on all activities or sometjing.. I'm not 100% sure. Do you really let your kids do whatever they wabt? No limitations anywhere? I think travel or high competitive activities are way too expensive and a time suck, not just for me, but for my kids. Like I said, I think for kids 14 and under free time and free play ate very important.

14 is too late to jump on the competitive sports bandwagon. If you wait that long, it's long over.

Then it's over. I'll listen to my kid and discuss things with them, but at the end of the day kids don't get to do everything they want.

It's also going to be fun because all of that "free time" will be spent on devices. Do you think 14 year olds are playing at the park?

Why not? 14 and under are kids. I absolutely expect then to be kids, what wrong with that? Devices arent big at my house, so that's a non issue

You sound very naive. Keep telling yourself your 14 year old is so different from any other kid that age and won’t want to sit around playing on a phone or on video games. That is what “hanging out” turns into. Your influence on your kids will wane and peer influences will become very important in adolescence. That’s how development works.

um ok.. I was 14 and I know what I was like. Yes, it's different with all the tech now, bit all of that is controllable. Quit assuming all 14 year olds are all the same. All I wanted to do at that age was be a kid.

I’m beginning to think you are a troll. Either that or a stupendously unaware parent.

Definitely a troll with nothing better to do than get a bunch of parents riled up. Such a pointless thread.

+1

Super weird to troll but whatever.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:While I have always admired highly athletic kids and wish them the best, I am just so glad that mine never fell into that category. The commitment required for travel sports sounds exhausting, and many of the parents seem insufferable. And for what? The vast majority of the kids end up putting the sport largely behind them, more often than not before college. I just don't get the appeal.

I don’t understand why people care so much about what other kids do. But I’ll bite..our kids enjoyed travel sports because they loved their sport, got frustrated in rec when kids missed games and practice at the drop of a hat, liked the competitive nature and overall higher skill and commitment levels in travel. None of them had any interest or desire to play in college. But they made great friends, stayed fit, and had great time management skills which served them well in high school and college.

Why isn’t the same disdain shown to non athletic extracurriculars? It gets old.

I wouldn't say I have disdain for travel sports or other highly competitive expensive exracurriculars, but I would never let my child do them. Money aside, these activities are intense abd really don't allow kids to be kids and have a childhood. I don't want my child so busy that they do not have time for much else.

So if your kid developed a particular passion that they loved enough to put the time in to improve, be it music or sports or whatever, you'd discourage it?

Possibly, but its not like im putting a blanket ban on all activities or sometjing.. I'm not 100% sure. Do you really let your kids do whatever they wabt? No limitations anywhere? I think travel or high competitive activities are way too expensive and a time suck, not just for me, but for my kids. Like I said, I think for kids 14 and under free time and free play ate very important.

14 is too late to jump on the competitive sports bandwagon. If you wait that long, it's long over.

Then it's over. I'll listen to my kid and discuss things with them, but at the end of the day kids don't get to do everything they want.

It's also going to be fun because all of that "free time" will be spent on devices. Do you think 14 year olds are playing at the park?

Why not? 14 and under are kids. I absolutely expect then to be kids, what wrong with that? Devices arent big at my house, so that's a non issue

Sure, every 13 year old with no extra curriculars focusing on being a kid avoids just playing video games and texting

So are you saying imposing limits doesn't work?

So you don't want your kid to just be a kid and enjoy the freedom of childhood? How many teenagers do you see at playgrounds?

Who said anything about playgrounds? There is nothing for young teens to do outside to play with their friends? No bikes, pickup sports, neighborhood games? Ghost I'm the graveyard and manhunt were huge when l was those ages. Just because kids say that there isn't anything to do doesn't make it so

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Our kids play travel sports because DH and I both played travel sports then a college sport, so for us it is just a lifestyle that we love and are comfortable with spending our time and money to support. Ironically, our youngest son chose about the only 2 sports that neither of us played growing up (ice hockey and lacrosse), so we're having fun learning along the way, but the level of athleticism and parental commitment required is the same across most sports (though hockey is really expensive). Older kids played travel sports then D1 and D3 athletics (no scholarship for either). Wouldn't change it for the world. We just love sports.

Translation: we like it, so we forced it on our kids.

Yes, this. Because kids can't have a childhood or be functional adults without all of these extras.

Exactly. I love how the poster says her youngest chose a sport "neither of us played growing up." What she really means is: we made clear to the kids that they had to pick at least one sport to participate in and didn't give them a choice in the matter because that's how important we think playing a sport is. Because we all know that that is exactly what happened.

Kids who do sports when they are young learn the value of moving their bodies for the fun of it and it carries over into adulthood. Most people I know who didn't do any sports as kids are frumpy in their middle age. I'm guessing you're one of them. Have fun enjoying the health problems that come with being sedentary. I'm sure you'll lie here and say you exercise every day. I call BS.

Thanks for such a poor opinion of kids who don't play sports. Just so you know, some of us who didn't play sports growing up are disabled, who literally had no choice. But, sure go ahead and make fun.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I see some parents are comparing travel sports to other non-sport extracurriculars. Can someone share what non-sport extracurricular activities cost as much as travel sports, requires as much time from the parents, and puts as much stress on kids' bodies?

I have a kid who did children’s theater for years and a kid who did travel soccer and theater was a lot worse. Parents were nastier, rehearsal schedules much more intense than the travel soccer, and the parent volunteer stagehand requirements were far more than anything I saw in travel soccer. Cost was about equivalent.

Where?

I have a kid who has done several community theater productions and not my experience at all. There is no fee to participate. You can donate but it's sincerely not required. Rehearsal schedules are intense for tech weeks and during performance time. That's a couple weeks. And couldn't find a less nasty group of people What is there to be nasty about? Are people heckling during the performances? Pretty minimal volunteer requirements too. Typically kids do all of the stagehand and crew work. The tech crew kids are a whole other thing in theater from the performers and a lot of kids do this.

Youth theater company. Cost-wise, about the same cost as travel soccer. I think recreational community theater is more like rec sports, so you might not have encountered the same thing. The nastiness was based on kids looks, which was horrifying to hear. We were expected to put a lot of time into set volunteering and backstage management, far more than I did with travel soccer.

That having been said, my friend with a kid in a competitive ballet academy puts my theater stories to shame. OMG. Ballet parents are vicious.

What is a youth theater company? Did your kid get a paycheck?

It’s a company that puts on youth theater for its business, except it’s a nonprofit. Of course my kid didn’t get a paycheck. We paid a ridiculous amount of money for DC to be in play productions, as did everyone else.

Surely this is not a new thing to you if your kids do theater? Youth theater companies are common.

I’ve never done pay to play. My kid has done Encore in Arlington. It seems like their model is make a lot of money from summer and school break camps and workshops and they fundraise and they get some support from the county I think? But no you don’t pay to be in their shows.

[Anonymous]

He’s too athletic for non club. I put him in rec and the 1st play he hit a kid and they were on the ground crying.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:While I have always admired highly athletic kids and wish them the best, I am just so glad that mine never fell into that category. The commitment required for travel sports sounds exhausting, and many of the parents seem insufferable. And for what? The vast majority of the kids end up putting the sport largely behind them, more often than not before college. I just don't get the appeal.

I don’t understand why people care so much about what other kids do. But I’ll bite..our kids enjoyed travel sports because they loved their sport, got frustrated in rec when kids missed games and practice at the drop of a hat, liked the competitive nature and overall higher skill and commitment levels in travel. None of them had any interest or desire to play in college. But they made great friends, stayed fit, and had great time management skills which served them well in high school and college.

Why isn’t the same disdain shown to non athletic extracurriculars? It gets old.

I wouldn't say I have disdain for travel sports or other highly competitive expensive exracurriculars, but I would never let my child do them. Money aside, these activities are intense abd really don't allow kids to be kids and have a childhood. I don't want my child so busy that they do not have time for much else.

So if your kid developed a particular passion that they loved enough to put the time in to improve, be it music or sports or whatever, you'd discourage it?

Possibly, but its not like im putting a blanket ban on all activities or sometjing.. I'm not 100% sure. Do you really let your kids do whatever they wabt? No limitations anywhere? I think travel or high competitive activities are way too expensive and a time suck, not just for me, but for my kids. Like I said, I think for kids 14 and under free time and free play ate very important.

14 is too late to jump on the competitive sports bandwagon. If you wait that long, it's long over.

Then it's over. I'll listen to my kid and discuss things with them, but at the end of the day kids don't get to do everything they want.

It's also going to be fun because all of that "free time" will be spent on devices. Do you think 14 year olds are playing at the park?

Why not? 14 and under are kids. I absolutely expect then to be kids, what wrong with that? Devices arent big at my house, so that's a non issue

Sure, every 13 year old with no extra curriculars focusing on being a kid avoids just playing video games and texting

So are you saying imposing limits doesn't work?

So you don't want your kid to just be a kid and enjoy the freedom of childhood? How many teenagers do you see at playgrounds?

Who said anything about playgrounds? There is nothing for young teens to do outside to play with their friends? No bikes, pickup sports, neighborhood games? Ghost I'm the graveyard and manhunt were huge when l was those ages. Just because kids say that there isn't anything to do doesn't make it so

OMG. Thank you for reminding me about Ghosts in the Graveyard! You have inspired me to plan a summer party for our 13 year old and his friends where we introduce them to the classic outdoor games of our childhood (Other than Smear the …). And yes, my kid mostly uses his phone to arrange basketball pickup games at local parks.

[Anonymous]

You're welcome! See it is possible for older kids to play outside and be kids.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:While I have always admired highly athletic kids and wish them the best, I am just so glad that mine never fell into that category. The commitment required for travel sports sounds exhausting, and many of the parents seem insufferable. And for what? The vast majority of the kids end up putting the sport largely behind them, more often than not before college. I just don't get the appeal.

I don’t understand why people care so much about what other kids do. But I’ll bite..our kids enjoyed travel sports because they loved their sport, got frustrated in rec when kids missed games and practice at the drop of a hat, liked the competitive nature and overall higher skill and commitment levels in travel. None of them had any interest or desire to play in college. But they made great friends, stayed fit, and had great time management skills which served them well in high school and college.

Why isn’t the same disdain shown to non athletic extracurriculars? It gets old.

To be fair, what other extracurriculars demand so much time and travel starting at such a young age? I can't think of any. The families I've seen do it, it totally breaks up family time too. Often one parent goes around with the one kids and the other parent stays home with other kid(s). These are late elementary age kids. Not older.

Competitive gymnastics starts much younger and is a much greater commitment hours-wise. Plenty of 8-year-old practicing 16 hours per week year round, not counting meets. You can always imagine a scenario with more hours, more commitment, etc. Just do what makes YOUR kid happy. They only get to be little once.