Agree or disagree? Kids should only play travel sports if they have college or pro potential

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:While I have always admired highly athletic kids and wish them the best, I am just so glad that mine never fell into that category. The commitment required for travel sports sounds exhausting, and many of the parents seem insufferable. And for what? The vast majority of the kids end up putting the sport largely behind them, more often than not before college. I just don't get the appeal.

The parents like it. They like watching. They like hanging with the other parents. They often were athletic themselves and sometimes, not always, they perceive that it has a lot of social cache for themselves and their child.

I had a daughter who played a D3 sport in college. The group of parents for her travel team in high school was a whole scene. Lots of going out and drinking together. I let my husband partake and stayed home. But they enjoy it.

My kids played various recreational level (i.e, non-travel) sports through high school. Every single thing that you have just described took place in that context as well, and was loads and loads of fun -- except for the "social cache" thing. That's what I meant when I said "insufferable," so thanks for proving my point.

I am the poster you are responding to. I agree the social cache thing is insufferable. Just calling what I see.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’ll agree to this only if you also agree that no kids should do children’s theater or music unless they have a chance of being in Hollywood movies, Broadway, or a major symphony.

Personally I might seriously consider this tradeoff if it spares me the pain of yet one more youth theater performance.

Playing sports in college isn't the same thing as being in Hollywood movies or on Broadway. Why isn't the analogy to being in college theatre?

Stupid stupid stupid response.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’ll agree to this only if you also agree that no kids should do children’s theater or music unless they have a chance of being in Hollywood movies, Broadway, or a major symphony.

Personally I might seriously consider this tradeoff if it spares me the pain of yet one more youth theater performance.

+1. Also, competitive dance, modeling, pageants. All of those things take competitive parents to a whole different level. They make sports parents look calm.

[Anonymous]

Total non-athlete here whose kids do both travel and rec sports.

Perhaps this doesn't fit the narrative, but in my experience, at least 90% of the parents in both arenas are totally sane, friendly but not friends.

The crazy sports parents are notable because they are indeed the exception to the rule.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Completely disagree. Sports can show you how to be part of a team, how to work together, push through during difficult times. They have value for everyone. Help develop who you are. FWIW, I was a kid who got eliminated from
Their travel team but then tried a different sport. Still had so much personal growth

Focus. We're talking about travel sports, not sports in general.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’ll agree to this only if you also agree that no kids should do children’s theater or music unless they have a chance of being in Hollywood movies, Broadway, or a major symphony.

Personally I might seriously consider this tradeoff if it spares me the pain of yet one more youth theater performance.

Playing sports in college isn't the same thing as being in Hollywood movies or on Broadway. Why isn't the analogy to being in college theatre?

Stupid stupid stupid response.

You said college or pro potential, idiot. Hollywood and Broadway are the equivalent of pro. I’m fine with adding college theater to the list. So no youth orchestras, theater, etc. unless you can get admitted to a college for music and theater.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I see some parents are comparing travel sports to other non-sport extracurriculars. Can someone share what non-sport extracurricular activities cost as much as travel sports, requires as much time from the parents, and puts as much stress on kids' bodies?

I have a kid who did children’s theater for years and a kid who did travel soccer and theater was a lot worse. Parents were nastier, rehearsal schedules much more intense than the travel soccer, and the parent volunteer stagehand requirements were far more than anything I saw in travel soccer. Cost was about equivalent.

Where?

I have a kid who has done several community theater productions and not my experience at all. There is no fee to participate. You can donate but it's sincerely not required. Rehearsal schedules are intense for tech weeks and during performance time. That's a couple weeks. And couldn't find a less nasty group of people What is there to be nasty about? Are people heckling during the performances? Pretty minimal volunteer requirements too. Typically kids do all of the stagehand and crew work. The tech crew kids are a whole other thing in theater from the performers and a lot of kids do this.

Youth theater company. Cost-wise, about the same cost as travel soccer. I think recreational community theater is more like rec sports, so you might not have encountered the same thing. The nastiness was based on kids looks, which was horrifying to hear. We were expected to put a lot of time into set volunteering and backstage management, far more than I did with travel soccer.

That having been said, my friend with a kid in a competitive ballet academy puts my theater stories to shame. OMG. Ballet parents are vicious.

[Anonymous]

I think it's fine if you want to do it but a parent but it is a waste of time and money for all but a tiny number of kids.

Now that our kids are in high school what we saw is that kids who played rec sports, were generally active and enjoyed sports in general, could pick up sports pretty quickly in high school if they wanted to. They didn't need as intense of level of basic training as little kids who need the constant repeating and building up muscle memory and tone.

Older kids starting out in sports are generally able to pick things up quicker, already have muscle tone and develop muscle memory faster. The practice time is more productive for older kids vs. younger as well which leads to better quicker gains.

[Anonymous]

DD's high school boyfriend who was a legit football star who did it purely for the joy of the game but nonetheless caught the interest of several lower level Division 1 programs. In the end, nothing came of any of it and he went on with his life with no regrets and without ever looking back. His parents were also extremely low key about the whole thing.

I still remember being at an "A" team swim meet with one of my younger kids a few years later, after the boyfriend had graduated, where I heard one of the "insufferables" trashing the kid and his parents for not pushing harder and saying that, had they done that, he'd still be playing. It disgusted me. That's the difference between A and B team parents.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’ll agree to this only if you also agree that no kids should do children’s theater or music unless they have a chance of being in Hollywood movies, Broadway, or a major symphony.

Personally I might seriously consider this tradeoff if it spares me the pain of yet one more youth theater performance.

Playing sports in college isn't the same thing as being in Hollywood movies or on Broadway. Why isn't the analogy to being in college theatre?

Stupid stupid stupid response.

You said college or pro potential, idiot. Hollywood and Broadway are the equivalent of pro. I’m fine with adding college theater to the list. So no youth orchestras, theater, etc. unless you can get admitted to a college for music and theater.

I didn't. I'm not OP.

[Anonymous]

I had one kid who loved travel more than anything. She would have been miserable playing rec because she was just too competitive. Was recruited by D3 but wanted a larger school environment. I was never a talented athlete so I had a fairly laidback attitude towards all of it---I just wanted to help my child do something they loved. I also kind of liked the long drives and tournaments because it gave me solo time with this child. My take was always that we would do it until the point in time that my DD wasn't enjoying it, or wanted to do something else.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’ll agree to this only if you also agree that no kids should do children’s theater or music unless they have a chance of being in Hollywood movies, Broadway, or a major symphony.

Personally I might seriously consider this tradeoff if it spares me the pain of yet one more youth theater performance.

Playing sports in college isn't the same thing as being in Hollywood movies or on Broadway. Why isn't the analogy to being in college theatre?

Stupid stupid stupid response.

You said college or pro potential, idiot. Hollywood and Broadway are the equivalent of pro. I’m fine with adding college theater to the list. So no youth orchestras, theater, etc. unless you can get admitted to a college for music and theater.

I didn't. I'm not OP.

So you just can’t read then.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’ll agree to this only if you also agree that no kids should do children’s theater or music unless they have a chance of being in Hollywood movies, Broadway, or a major symphony.

Personally I might seriously consider this tradeoff if it spares me the pain of yet one more youth theater performance.

Playing sports in college isn't the same thing as being in Hollywood movies or on Broadway. Why isn't the analogy to being in college theatre?

Stupid stupid stupid response.

You said college or pro potential, idiot. Hollywood and Broadway are the equivalent of pro. I’m fine with adding college theater to the list. So no youth orchestras, theater, etc. unless you can get admitted to a college for music and theater.

I didn't. I'm not OP.

So you just can’t read then.

No, you chose only to answer one half of OP's question.

[Anonymous]

I wouldn't do travel sports period, but I can't imagine a kid actually wanting unless they had those goals.

[Anonymous]

Strong disagree. I have one kid who plays a travel sport, and one kid who has only ever played rec and has never tried out for travel. For the latter child, the sport is mostly about having fun with his friends and less about the sport itself, so rec fits him perfectly. For the former, he loves the sport even though he probably will not play at the college level and is showing no signs of pro potential. He felt frustrated with rec because he wanted to play at a more competitive level. He is learning valuable skills about teamwork, hard work, self-motivation, and what it takes to succeed at something at a high level. And he is having fun in the process, more than he did at the rec level. Each of my kids is exactly where they should be, because it's entirely driven by their own motivation rather than external pressures.