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This is what my spouse told me when I asked him why it took so long for him to arrive to the gym this morning. He woke up at 7 am. He arrived there at 8. I don’t what he did for an hour! I thought he went to the post office to send my sister’s packages and then to Home Depot to return some items. He told me he did that after the gym. Why would it take so long for him to get ready and get to the gym. He’s a Fed abs is taking les but these two weeks while I WFH.
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| Why are you managing his time? |
| What the hell???? Who cares. No wonder he told you it's none of your business. If someone tried to control me like you're trying to control him I'd say the same thing. |
| You watch your husband that carefully that you know what time he arrives at places? And yes, most people in a relationship don't have to justify where they are or what they are doing. But it sounds like there is a lot more going on if you're already tracking his coming and going. |
| How do you know what time he arrived? |
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He was pooping and reading his phone, obviously.
So what? |
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You’re nuts. An hour? Maybe he had to poop and it took an extra few minutes. Maybe he got stopped by a train. Maybe he wanted coffee. Maybe he wanted some peace from you.
Mine told me he was going to wash his car, then showed up 8 hours later. Repeated the next day. That’s when it’s worth a conversation. |
This is about what it takes my husband when on leave to JUST get ready to get ready to leave to go to the gym. |
| You are batshi* crazy. You are not his mother. Keep this up and you will be divorced. You worry if he comes home at 2 a.m. You don't worry for an hour. He could be doing errands, on the phone with a friend or reading the news. My God. Are you 12? |
| He’s right. Check yourself, OP. This is batsh*t. |
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He’s absolutely right: he doesn’t need to justify an hour from wake-up to arriving at a gym. He’s a grown-a$$ adult.
Send him a text right now apologizing for your rude question. Here, let me help you: “Hey, I was totally out of line this morning with the question about your time. It was not okay. Clearly I’m stressed about something and need to get it in check. I’m sorry and will do better.” |
| He was picking up your Christmas present. Now he’s contemplating returning it. |
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If he left the house at 7 and got to the gym at 8 that might seem strange. But an hour between waking up and getting to your first destination in the day seems pretty reasonable to me?
Also how do you know when he got to the gym? Are you tracking his phone? Did he cheat? This is a very strange post, but unless there are extenuating circumstances I think his response about not having to account for his time is both accurate and justified. |
Because I have things I need him to do. We had a huge fight the other night because after we decorated the Christmas tree I told him to take the boxes back to the attic and he said he would do it in the morning. Why not now? He just wastes time. |
| He went for a cup of coffee and peace of mind. You’re nuts! |