Group texting

[Anonymous]

Your DIL asks you at dinner one evening if you can include her in your family group chat with your husband and children. How do you respond? You live close to your son and DIL so you know her really well this isn't like a DIL you barely see. Would you honor her request or tell her you rather just keep it to your spouse and children the core family that all grew up together?

[Anonymous]

Is this a joke? How is there any right answer besides include DIL in group texts going forward?

[Anonymous]

She never would have had to ask me.

[Anonymous]

Can’t you have a text group that includes her and a separate one that doesn’t?

We have lots of variations of text groups in my family depending upon what kind of information is being conveyed and who cares about which topics.

[Anonymous]

I mean I think its weird to have a nuclear family text group and exclude the spouse in that manner. And I usually don't take the in-laws side (like that chick who thought it was crime that her MIL wouldn't bake her cake and throw a giant party like she did for the kids + blood relations).

A group chat? You can include her.

[Anonymous]

Why on earth would you exclude DIL? She is part of your family now, and excluding her is a you problem. She is correct to ask to be included, and you should be embarrassed that she had to ask - you should have included her as soon as they got married

[Anonymous]

We have both on my husband’s side. One chat with the parents, kids, and spouses. There’s another that’s just the parents and kids and I see no issue with having both.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We have both on my husband’s side. One chat with the parents, kids, and spouses. There’s another that’s just the parents and kids and I see no issue with having both.

Why do you need a separate one w/o spouses? Don't you assume your child/sibling is going to tell their spouse anyways?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I mean I think its weird to have a nuclear family text group and exclude the spouse in that manner. And I usually don't take the in-laws side (like that chick who thought it was crime that her MIL wouldn't bake her cake and throw a giant party like she did for the kids + blood relations).

A group chat? You can include her.

LOL it was more that she was the only family member MIL didn't acknowledge. But ok

[Anonymous]

Lol on our extended family text group I’m sure the spouses don’t want to be on. I sure don’t want to be on my spouse’s family text groups.

[Anonymous]

I would be hurt if my husband didn't automatically add me to his family group chat. I'm his wife for Christ's sakes. That wouldn't be my MIL's responsibility to add me but rather my husband you know the man I married. So I'm not too sure why your DIL brought this up to you instead of your son aka her husband.

[Anonymous]

No question about it. You include her in the group chat and with EVERYTHING having to do with your family. She is part of your family. Treat her like family.

[Anonymous]

Are you kidding me? Who on earth wants to be on a group text string? Please make sure to leave me off, thank you lol

[Anonymous]

My MIL included me in the family chat after my husband asked her to but we both notice she always always texts on the other one that I'm not in. I just take that as a hint that she doesn't see me as family. I stopped texting her first because I always reached out to her first and while she would always respond and engage in convo with me when we would have a family group chat she would never include me in it.

I'll give an example, when I knew she was going away on vacation with FIK and some friends I would always text her to have a good time and enjoy herself and she would always respond back and engage with me but then when posting vacay pics and updates she would never include me in the group chat which is odd since I reached out to her first about her vacation.

So now I never bother texting her first anymore because clearly she doesn't want to reciprocate in the relationship. Which I guess is fine because it's one less relationship I have to worry about in my life of actively cultivating.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Are you kidding me? Who on earth wants to be on a group text string? Please make sure to leave me off, thank you lol

I was just thinking this! A group chat with my MIL, FIL, SIL and BIL? No thanks. I’m good.