White people who claim minority status bc their spouse is a minority?
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Anonymous
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A friend of mine who married a (white) Jewish guy told me this week that she considers herself a minority now.
She is white, raised Catholic, born in the US to white parents also born in the US. She did not convert to Judaism when they married and does not intend to (considers herself an atheist). She says his minority status applies to her now because they are a “mixed-ethnicity” couple, and because their kids will be Jewish. What am I missing here? This seems insane to me. If I were her spouse I’d find it personally offensive. Is this something other people do?? Have never heard of it before. |
Anonymous
| Well this thread will go well… |
Anonymous
| When you are married and have children, you share the same culture and ways of doing things regardless of your own ethnic background. She probably means that she is part of the community. |
Anonymous
No she literally said “I am a minority now.” Not “I am part of this community now.” Also, her husband is not religious and the don’t really observe the high holy days beyond saying “chag sameach” or similar in an email— I know because I’ve asked about getting together for holidays and they don’t do anything. Maybe they observe Hanukkah at home, I’m not sure. But she is definitely not part of the Jewish community. I know many Jews married to non-Jews and have NEVER encountered this before. |
Anonymous
| Jews are not considered an URM in college admissions. Let's just leave it at that. |
Anonymous
Why would that be the deciding factor? I’m not talking about college admissions. |
Anonymous
| Well, your friend is seriously misguided. |
Anonymous
| I'd just roll my eyes and let it go. She's excited because she thinks she can lay claim to a more "special" identity now. That's sad, but nothing you can say will matter. |
Anonymous
| Tell Ivanka to stop clamoring for attention. |
Anonymous
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I know someone that claimed to be a minority on behalf of her adopted "people of color children" during a discussion about slavery.
Her children are Asian... |
Anonymous
If that's what she said then yeah that's weird! I think some white people here feel like they are not special enough. I am white too but from another continent and it struck me that lots of people would refer to themselves as "just plain" "just a regular American". So at the same time they consider themselves to be the norm but they also feel inferior about not being special enough. Complicated! |
Anonymous
This. She'll learn though, probably the hard way. |
Anonymous
This is how it came off to me too but I felt like I couldn’t say anything because I didn’t want to overstep. Normally I wouldn’t tell someone how to identify but this really got under my skin. It made me think of that Rachel Dolezal woman (the white lady who posed as black). I think I just said “I am not sure it works that way” and then she disagreed and I dropped it. But ugh. I have family members who are not Jewish. I love them, they are welcome at everything, but if one of them said this I think I’d speak up. There’s just a long history there and claiming ownership of it like this feels very wrong to me. |
Anonymous
| She sounds insecure. Also sounds like her husband is dominating the relationship by imposing his background to the extent she’s not really identifying with hers anymore. Anyway, doesn’t seem like something that impacts you personally. I’d let it go. |
Anonymous
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LMAO
That woman is much of a minority as Ivanka is. |