If you were opposed to circumcision for your son but did it anyway, how did it go?

[Anonymous]

I was strongly leaning towards no circumcision but my husband felt very strongly that our son be circumcised. We are not Jewish. I went ahead with it at Sibley and everything seemed to turn out fine at first. By my son's one month check-up, it became clear that the OB who performed the procedure did not cut off enough skin. By four-six months my son's penis had droopy, jagged foreskin and he did not appear to be circumcised at all. He went on to develop painful adhesions and we had to "re-do" his circumcision for medical reasons (in addition to cosmetic ones). We had to wait until he was 13 months to do it and my son had to be placed under general anesthesia which was terrifying.

Everything turned out fine in the end and we had an excellent surgeon, Dr. Louis Marmon. He is also a mohel. If you do go ahead with the procedure, my advice would be to get an expert THE FIRST TIME. I did not have another child, but would have had an even harder decision if I had another son.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would strongly prefer not to circumcise our baby if we have a son, however my husband feels strongly that we should (we are Jewish). We still haven't decided what we are going to do, but I'm just curious, if you were opposed to circumcising your son or had serious reservations about it, but went ahead with it anyway, how did you feel during and after the procedure? Did you have certain requirements for doing the procedure (hiring a mohel, insisting on being present with your baby, having your baby not strapped down, waiting some period of time before doing it, etc.) that made you feel more at peace with it? Did you have lingering anger, resentment, guilt, regret, etc. afterwards, or was it just okay once it was done? Did your child experience any complications? I do not want this to devolve into a circumcision debate -- I'm very clear on what some people see as the pros and the cons, and am more looking for the specific experiences of those like myself who had concerns about circumcision but went ahead with it anyway. Thanks.

OP, here are 33 pages worth of stories from parents who circumcised their sons and wisht hey hadn't. not sure how many are Jewish. good luck with your decision. http://www.mothering.com/community/t/112410/if-you-regret-circumcising-your-son-s-please-post-here

Thanks for posting that link. Those are some really powerful stories and some great perspective.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would strongly prefer not to circumcise our baby if we have a son, however my husband feels strongly that we should (we are Jewish). We still haven't decided what we are going to do, but I'm just curious, if you were opposed to circumcising your son or had serious reservations about it, but went ahead with it anyway, how did you feel during and after the procedure? Did you have certain requirements for doing the procedure (hiring a mohel, insisting on being present with your baby, having your baby not strapped down, waiting some period of time before doing it, etc.) that made you feel more at peace with it? Did you have lingering anger, resentment, guilt, regret, etc. afterwards, or was it just okay once it was done? Did your child experience any complications? I do not want this to devolve into a circumcision debate -- I'm very clear on what some people see as the pros and the cons, and am more looking for the specific experiences of those like myself who had concerns about circumcision but went ahead with it anyway. Thanks.

OP, here are 33 pages worth of stories from parents who circumcised their sons and wisht hey hadn't. not sure how many are Jewish. good luck with your decision. http://www.mothering.com/community/t/112410/if-you-regret-circumcising-your-son-s-please-post-here

Thanks for posting that link. Those are some really powerful stories and some great perspective.

I haven't read the whole thread, but wow, there are some are emotionally wrenching stories in there.

[Anonymous]

I was opposed and refused to do it despite my husband's being Jewish and his preference that we do it. We didn't do it. Fast forward a few years and it just never comes up. It's a non-issue. I am still really glad we did not do it.

A woman I know asked me if we had done it and told me she had given in to her husband's wishes on it and circumcised her son. She seemed pretty unhappy about it. I didn't know what to say to her and felt awkward.

[Anonymous]

My DH's mom was really against circumcision while he dad really wanted him to get circumcised. The dad is a non-practicing muslim and he felt that it was a cultural expectation while his mom is french where they don't circumcise. In the end his dad won out and he was circumcised. Fast forward many years later - DH doesn't regret it and wants to circumcise any future son we have. I don't feel strongly about the issue either way.

[Anonymous]

My husband and I feel strongly in our opposing beliefs. When we talked about it a few weeks ago, and again when I emailed him info to share my POV, he was fuming. He even used those words "I am fuming." He usually doesn't get upset about things so I know this isn't him being dramatic.

While I feel strongly one way, I was wondering if I should give in even though I may regret that decision. I haven't read the link that was posted but will do so. I don't know if this will change anything or just make the decision more difficult but appreciate reading everyone's comments. Thanks.

[Anonymous]

I saw many, many circumcisions when I worked in labor and delivery. The majority of the babies didn't fuss, didn't cry and there was very little blood due to how the procedure is done.

There were many nervous parents who had heard horror stories and were pretty surprised to see the child just lying relaxed during the procedure and to see that there was very little blood and that it was so quick.

I think having someone who has done many, many circumcisions is key.

[Anonymous]

OK, the OP really didn't ask for a debate on this, but I am only seeing the religious and vanity perspectives here. There is a whole other group of pro-circumcision folks out there for HEALTH reasons. Considering this city's developing country levels of HIV/AIDs - the article below may be helpful to share. Also--info about men who went through the procedure in their adult lives...

“Male Circumcision Boosts Sexual Pleasure, AIDS Forum Told”

Posted by todd on Thursday, July 21st 2011
ITALY: “Male Circumcision Boosts Sexual Pleasure, AIDS Forum Told”

Agence France Presse (07.20.11)

Efforts to prevent HIV infection by promoting male circumcision — which reduces the risk of female-to-male transmission by about 60 percent — got a boost from news presented Wednesday at the 6th International AIDS Society Conference on HIV Pathogenesis, Treatment and Prevention in Rome.

In a study of 316 men, average age 22, circumcised between February and September 2009, 82.3 percent said they were “very satisfied” with the operation a month later, and 17.7 percent rated themselves “satisfied,” reported researchers from Uganda’s University of Makerere.

In addition, 87.7 percent found it easier to reach orgasm after the procedure, and 92.3 percent said they achieved more sexual pleasure. More than 95.4 percent said their partner was satisfied with the look of their circumcised penis, a sentiment shared by nine-tenths of the men. One year after the operation, one-quarter of the 220 then-sexually active men said they used condoms.

Although male circumcision does not directly reduce a female’s risk of acquiring HIV from an infected partner, it confers an indirect, statistical advantage to women by reducing the number of infected men.

As of mid-2010, about 175,000 medical circumcisions had been performed to help prevent HIV in 13 high-prevalence countries, UNAIDS said.

For more conference news, visit http://www.ias2011.org/.

[Anonymous]

The medical evidence supportimg vaccines and circumcision is clear if you don't do them you are stupid

[Anonymous]

The medical evidence supportimg vaccines and circumcision is clear if you don't do them you are stupid

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The medical evidence supportimg vaccines and circumcision is clear if you don't do them you are stupid

hahahaha yeah right. Nice try.

[Anonymous]

Didn't let them chop off his penis and don't regret it! We were asked about it 5 times- was going to throw the 6th person out of the room.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you husband feels so strongly and you're jewish, you should do it. I think that husbands get more say in this because they're men and have lived with being circed or not circed their whole lives.

Yes, this. Women don't really get a vote in this.

Very interesting. The mother doesn't get a say. Well, the dad shouldn't either, because he doesn't understand the experience of being intact. So, perhaps wait and ask the son as he grows up what he wants to do with his body?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I saw many, many circumcisions when I worked in labor and delivery. The majority of the babies didn't fuss, didn't cry and there was very little blood due to how the procedure is done.

There were many nervous parents who had heard horror stories and were pretty surprised to see the child just lying relaxed during the procedure and to see that there was very little blood and that it was so quick.

I think having someone who has done many, many circumcisions is key.

We are Christians. Every male on both sides has been circumcised.

I was hormonal when 24 hours in hospital stay they came to get firstborn for it. I almost backed out.

Dr Megan Breen, OB at Georgetown did it. She was trained by Mohels. Zero problems and my son wasn't even crying-they were gone mere minutes.

Second son. Dr Wulf-Giiterrez did it. Also- went great. We were both in the hospital only 24 hours so his was done soon.

[Anonymous]

It was fine. I would not have done if it were only my decision, but it worked out. My DH felt strongly that it needed to be done. I asked male friends what they thought--I have a lot because I work in a male dominated field. Almost to a man, they all insisted that it should be done--for cleanliness, to look "normal', etc., so I caved. I was glad my regular OB performed the procedure. She is Jewish and an excellent surgeon. She assured me that they use numbing cream and that they cry more because they are restrained than from pain. It was over quickly, it healed quickly, he looks perfect. If it had to be done, I couldn't ask for a better outcome. No catastrophes, just maybe unnecessary.