Truthfully, can you both have careers and have 3+ kids?

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:I’m curious how many of these responders have three kids. Everyone I know with three+ kids wouldn’t change it. It’s human nature to adapt. If you have a strong marriage, similar desire for more kids, and means - go for it.

I'm a previous responder, and I have three kids, and my husband and I both work. It's really hard, and I am at a breaking point at least 1-2 times a week, because I feel like I haven't had sufficient 1-1 interaction with my kids (much less my husband). We are generally just cars passing each other in the driveway as we drive the kids to all of their things (our kids are 14, 11, and 8).

Of course I wouldn't change my family - I can't imagine life without my kids! I love watching them grow and I love watching each and every sporting event (maybe not winter swim meets, but oh well!) But I also agree with a previous poster that you need to also think about your own happiness and mental health. There are days when I have basically no time for myself, and despite my husband (who works remotely full-time) pulling a ton of weight, if you're a mom, the likelihood is that you're still going to carry much more of the domestic and emotional load (even, if as in my case, you are the priority breadwinner.)

Again! Wouldn't change my 3 kids. But I worry about my stress and emotional health, and probably as a result of those two things, am prone to yelling when frustrated.

How old are your kids? Do you work from home? I usually can spend at least 30 minutes to multiple hours 1:1 with each kid each day and my kids are 5 and under. Also, my husband and I have a lot of intimacy, talk multiple times a day, and hang out at night. We’re very connected.

DP, but that's because you have very young children still that are napping, going to bed early, and not in extracurriculars. PP said she has 8, 11, and 14 year olds, which is fundamentally different parenting than babies and preschoolers. Try not to sound so smug when you just don't know yet.

None of my children nap and my youngest wakes up multiple times a night.

I think it comes down to what you prioritize.

Oh and my oldest does field hockey on the weekends and during the week gymnastics, swimming, water polo, and tennis. My child is swimming and gymnastics.

Not trying to sound smug but as your children get older it should be easier to spend 1:1 time with them and talking to your spouse during the day is about picking up the phone occasionally and chatting…and chatting before bed. If you are chaperoning your kids to activities can’t you talk to them? Isn’t it easier to spend time with your spouse when your kids don’t need constant supervision…and if they are going to be late why can’t you spend any of that time with them?

As someone who played water polo in college, I'm dying laughing imagining PP's four-year old taking water polo lessons. Lady, you're nuts.

I did too. Where did you play? You didn’t. If you did you would know club activities start at 4/5. You’re a troll and the only point you’ve made is that you’re a troll.

engaging in "club activities" <> training/playing a sport

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m curious how many of these responders have three kids. Everyone I know with three+ kids wouldn’t change it. It’s human nature to adapt. If you have a strong marriage, similar desire for more kids, and means - go for it.

I'm a previous responder, and I have three kids, and my husband and I both work. It's really hard, and I am at a breaking point at least 1-2 times a week, because I feel like I haven't had sufficient 1-1 interaction with my kids (much less my husband). We are generally just cars passing each other in the driveway as we drive the kids to all of their things (our kids are 14, 11, and 8).

Of course I wouldn't change my family - I can't imagine life without my kids! I love watching them grow and I love watching each and every sporting event (maybe not winter swim meets, but oh well!) But I also agree with a previous poster that you need to also think about your own happiness and mental health. There are days when I have basically no time for myself, and despite my husband (who works remotely full-time) pulling a ton of weight, if you're a mom, the likelihood is that you're still going to carry much more of the domestic and emotional load (even, if as in my case, you are the priority breadwinner.)

Again! Wouldn't change my 3 kids. But I worry about my stress and emotional health, and probably as a result of those two things, am prone to yelling when frustrated.

How old are your kids? Do you work from home? I usually can spend at least 30 minutes to multiple hours 1:1 with each kid each day and my kids are 5 and under. Also, my husband and I have a lot of intimacy, talk multiple times a day, and hang out at night. We’re very connected.

DP, but that's because you have very young children still that are napping, going to bed early, and not in extracurriculars. PP said she has 8, 11, and 14 year olds, which is fundamentally different parenting than babies and preschoolers. Try not to sound so smug when you just don't know yet.

None of my children nap and my youngest wakes up multiple times a night.

I think it comes down to what you prioritize.

Oh and my oldest does field hockey on the weekends and during the week gymnastics, swimming, water polo, and tennis. My child is swimming and gymnastics.

Not trying to sound smug but as your children get older it should be easier to spend 1:1 time with them and talking to your spouse during the day is about picking up the phone occasionally and chatting…and chatting before bed. If you are chaperoning your kids to activities can’t you talk to them? Isn’t it easier to spend time with your spouse when your kids don’t need constant supervision…and if they are going to be late why can’t you spend any of that time with them?

As someone who played water polo in college, I'm dying laughing imagining PP's four-year old taking water polo lessons. Lady, you're nuts.

I did too. Where did you play? You didn’t. If you did you would know club activities start at 4/5. You’re a troll and the only point you’ve made is that you’re a troll.

Pathetic

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m curious how many of these responders have three kids. Everyone I know with three+ kids wouldn’t change it. It’s human nature to adapt. If you have a strong marriage, similar desire for more kids, and means - go for it.

I'm a previous responder, and I have three kids, and my husband and I both work. It's really hard, and I am at a breaking point at least 1-2 times a week, because I feel like I haven't had sufficient 1-1 interaction with my kids (much less my husband). We are generally just cars passing each other in the driveway as we drive the kids to all of their things (our kids are 14, 11, and 8).

Of course I wouldn't change my family - I can't imagine life without my kids! I love watching them grow and I love watching each and every sporting event (maybe not winter swim meets, but oh well!) But I also agree with a previous poster that you need to also think about your own happiness and mental health. There are days when I have basically no time for myself, and despite my husband (who works remotely full-time) pulling a ton of weight, if you're a mom, the likelihood is that you're still going to carry much more of the domestic and emotional load (even, if as in my case, you are the priority breadwinner.)

Again! Wouldn't change my 3 kids. But I worry about my stress and emotional health, and probably as a result of those two things, am prone to yelling when frustrated.

How old are your kids? Do you work from home? I usually can spend at least 30 minutes to multiple hours 1:1 with each kid each day and my kids are 5 and under. Also, my husband and I have a lot of intimacy, talk multiple times a day, and hang out at night. We’re very connected.

DP, but that's because you have very young children still that are napping, going to bed early, and not in extracurriculars. PP said she has 8, 11, and 14 year olds, which is fundamentally different parenting than babies and preschoolers. Try not to sound so smug when you just don't know yet.

None of my children nap and my youngest wakes up multiple times a night.

I think it comes down to what you prioritize.

Oh and my oldest does field hockey on the weekends and during the week gymnastics, swimming, water polo, and tennis. My child is swimming and gymnastics.

Not trying to sound smug but as your children get older it should be easier to spend 1:1 time with them and talking to your spouse during the day is about picking up the phone occasionally and chatting…and chatting before bed. If you are chaperoning your kids to activities can’t you talk to them? Isn’t it easier to spend time with your spouse when your kids don’t need constant supervision…and if they are going to be late why can’t you spend any of that time with them?

As someone who played water polo in college, I'm dying laughing imagining PP's four-year old taking water polo lessons. Lady, you're nuts.

I did too. Where did you play? You didn’t. If you did you would know club activities start at 4/5. You’re a troll and the only point you’ve made is that you’re a troll.

engaging in "club activities" <> training/playing a sport

+1. This a ridiculous, easily googleable question. There are no water polo teams for 4-5 year olds in the DMV. Kids do swim lessons at 4-5, start swim team at 6-7 (at the earliest), and can add or switch to water polo around 9-10. PP either doesn't live in the DMV is is a troll.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m curious how many of these responders have three kids. Everyone I know with three+ kids wouldn’t change it. It’s human nature to adapt. If you have a strong marriage, similar desire for more kids, and means - go for it.

I'm a previous responder, and I have three kids, and my husband and I both work. It's really hard, and I am at a breaking point at least 1-2 times a week, because I feel like I haven't had sufficient 1-1 interaction with my kids (much less my husband). We are generally just cars passing each other in the driveway as we drive the kids to all of their things (our kids are 14, 11, and 8).

Of course I wouldn't change my family - I can't imagine life without my kids! I love watching them grow and I love watching each and every sporting event (maybe not winter swim meets, but oh well!) But I also agree with a previous poster that you need to also think about your own happiness and mental health. There are days when I have basically no time for myself, and despite my husband (who works remotely full-time) pulling a ton of weight, if you're a mom, the likelihood is that you're still going to carry much more of the domestic and emotional load (even, if as in my case, you are the priority breadwinner.)

Again! Wouldn't change my 3 kids. But I worry about my stress and emotional health, and probably as a result of those two things, am prone to yelling when frustrated.

How old are your kids? Do you work from home? I usually can spend at least 30 minutes to multiple hours 1:1 with each kid each day and my kids are 5 and under. Also, my husband and I have a lot of intimacy, talk multiple times a day, and hang out at night. We’re very connected.

DP, but that's because you have very young children still that are napping, going to bed early, and not in extracurriculars. PP said she has 8, 11, and 14 year olds, which is fundamentally different parenting than babies and preschoolers. Try not to sound so smug when you just don't know yet.

None of my children nap and my youngest wakes up multiple times a night.

I think it comes down to what you prioritize.

Oh and my oldest does field hockey on the weekends and during the week gymnastics, swimming, water polo, and tennis. My child is swimming and gymnastics.

Not trying to sound smug but as your children get older it should be easier to spend 1:1 time with them and talking to your spouse during the day is about picking up the phone occasionally and chatting…and chatting before bed. If you are chaperoning your kids to activities can’t you talk to them? Isn’t it easier to spend time with your spouse when your kids don’t need constant supervision…and if they are going to be late why can’t you spend any of that time with them?

As someone who played water polo in college, I'm dying laughing imagining PP's four-year old taking water polo lessons. Lady, you're nuts.

I did too. Where did you play? You didn’t. If you did you would know club activities start at 4/5. You’re a troll and the only point you’ve made is that you’re a troll.

engaging in "club activities" <> training/playing a sport

+1. This a ridiculous, easily googleable question. There are no water polo teams for 4-5 year olds in the DMV. Kids do swim lessons at 4-5, start swim team at 6-7 (at the earliest), and can add or switch to water polo around 9-10. PP either doesn't live in the DMV is is a troll.

I also did a quick Google. I found one team that had some activities starting at 6 and I know my neighbor started her 7 or 8 year old at our local rec center for some sort of pre-water polo thing. 5 was the youngest I saw for water polo, and there was nothing offered in the DC area. Doesn't mean water polo preschooler PP lives here, I guess.

[Anonymous]

Marco Polo

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No part of the lifestyle the posters on the past 3 pages are describing (3 kids 5 and under in 5 different activities per week and w/ a nanny and preschool) sounds fun at all to me.

I want to actually spend time w/ my kids. I want my kids to have time w/ me just focusing on them 1:1. I want to get to know my kids as people and not just shuttle them around to one activity after another (or have a nanny do it). I want to have a life where we (my spouse and kids and I) can relax and enjoy each other's company and not every waking minute is spent engaged in some "elite sport", working, or driving to/from work or elite sport. That does not sound enjoyable at all.

Think about what is best for your kids and you and your spouse, OP. Do you envision a lifestyle where everyone is always stressed, always going from one thing to the next? Or do you envision a lifestyle where you have a nice family dinner at home most nights and read your kids stories and put them to bed on time and talk about their day and sit on the couch cuddling with them? I think only you can decide what it is that works best for you and your family. Hopefully whatever you choose will also work for your kids as well.

If you have kids in travel sports you are probably not having dinner together every night - regardless of whether you have 2 or 3 children. If your spouse has a big job and gets home at 7 or 7:30 (as my husband does) you are not having family dinner together until your kids are in middle school. Another child does not make “getting to know” your children and family dinners impossible.

Your argument is dumb. Go away. You don’t belong in this forum anyway.

The argument that someone wants to actually spend time with their kids versus spending all their time working and then rushing home from work to shuttle kids to activities is dumb?

The argument that having 2 children instead of 3 will enable family dinners is dumb and your reading comprehension skills lead me to believe you are also dumb.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m curious how many of these responders have three kids. Everyone I know with three+ kids wouldn’t change it. It’s human nature to adapt. If you have a strong marriage, similar desire for more kids, and means - go for it.

I'm a previous responder, and I have three kids, and my husband and I both work. It's really hard, and I am at a breaking point at least 1-2 times a week, because I feel like I haven't had sufficient 1-1 interaction with my kids (much less my husband). We are generally just cars passing each other in the driveway as we drive the kids to all of their things (our kids are 14, 11, and 8).

Of course I wouldn't change my family - I can't imagine life without my kids! I love watching them grow and I love watching each and every sporting event (maybe not winter swim meets, but oh well!) But I also agree with a previous poster that you need to also think about your own happiness and mental health. There are days when I have basically no time for myself, and despite my husband (who works remotely full-time) pulling a ton of weight, if you're a mom, the likelihood is that you're still going to carry much more of the domestic and emotional load (even, if as in my case, you are the priority breadwinner.)

Again! Wouldn't change my 3 kids. But I worry about my stress and emotional health, and probably as a result of those two things, am prone to yelling when frustrated.

How old are your kids? Do you work from home? I usually can spend at least 30 minutes to multiple hours 1:1 with each kid each day and my kids are 5 and under. Also, my husband and I have a lot of intimacy, talk multiple times a day, and hang out at night. We’re very connected.

DP, but that's because you have very young children still that are napping, going to bed early, and not in extracurriculars. PP said she has 8, 11, and 14 year olds, which is fundamentally different parenting than babies and preschoolers. Try not to sound so smug when you just don't know yet.

None of my children nap and my youngest wakes up multiple times a night.

I think it comes down to what you prioritize.

Oh and my oldest does field hockey on the weekends and during the week gymnastics, swimming, water polo, and tennis. My child is swimming and gymnastics.

Not trying to sound smug but as your children get older it should be easier to spend 1:1 time with them and talking to your spouse during the day is about picking up the phone occasionally and chatting…and chatting before bed. If you are chaperoning your kids to activities can’t you talk to them? Isn’t it easier to spend time with your spouse when your kids don’t need constant supervision…and if they are going to be late why can’t you spend any of that time with them?

As someone who played water polo in college, I'm dying laughing imagining PP's four-year old taking water polo lessons. Lady, you're nuts.

I did too. Where did you play? You didn’t. If you did you would know club activities start at 4/5. You’re a troll and the only point you’ve made is that you’re a troll.

engaging in "club activities" <> training/playing a sport

+1. This a ridiculous, easily googleable question. There are no water polo teams for 4-5 year olds in the DMV. Kids do swim lessons at 4-5, start swim team at 6-7 (at the earliest), and can add or switch to water polo around 9-10. PP either doesn't live in the DMV is is a troll.

I also did a quick Google. I found one team that had some activities starting at 6 and I know my neighbor started her 7 or 8 year old at our local rec center for some sort of pre-water polo thing. 5 was the youngest I saw for water polo, and there was nothing offered in the DC area. Doesn't mean water polo preschooler PP lives here, I guess.

I don’t live in the DMV.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m curious how many of these responders have three kids. Everyone I know with three+ kids wouldn’t change it. It’s human nature to adapt. If you have a strong marriage, similar desire for more kids, and means - go for it.

I'm a previous responder, and I have three kids, and my husband and I both work. It's really hard, and I am at a breaking point at least 1-2 times a week, because I feel like I haven't had sufficient 1-1 interaction with my kids (much less my husband). We are generally just cars passing each other in the driveway as we drive the kids to all of their things (our kids are 14, 11, and 8).

Of course I wouldn't change my family - I can't imagine life without my kids! I love watching them grow and I love watching each and every sporting event (maybe not winter swim meets, but oh well!) But I also agree with a previous poster that you need to also think about your own happiness and mental health. There are days when I have basically no time for myself, and despite my husband (who works remotely full-time) pulling a ton of weight, if you're a mom, the likelihood is that you're still going to carry much more of the domestic and emotional load (even, if as in my case, you are the priority breadwinner.)

Again! Wouldn't change my 3 kids. But I worry about my stress and emotional health, and probably as a result of those two things, am prone to yelling when frustrated.

How old are your kids? Do you work from home? I usually can spend at least 30 minutes to multiple hours 1:1 with each kid each day and my kids are 5 and under. Also, my husband and I have a lot of intimacy, talk multiple times a day, and hang out at night. We’re very connected.

DP, but that's because you have very young children still that are napping, going to bed early, and not in extracurriculars. PP said she has 8, 11, and 14 year olds, which is fundamentally different parenting than babies and preschoolers. Try not to sound so smug when you just don't know yet.

None of my children nap and my youngest wakes up multiple times a night.

I think it comes down to what you prioritize.

Oh and my oldest does field hockey on the weekends and during the week gymnastics, swimming, water polo, and tennis. My child is swimming and gymnastics.

Not trying to sound smug but as your children get older it should be easier to spend 1:1 time with them and talking to your spouse during the day is about picking up the phone occasionally and chatting…and chatting before bed. If you are chaperoning your kids to activities can’t you talk to them? Isn’t it easier to spend time with your spouse when your kids don’t need constant supervision…and if they are going to be late why can’t you spend any of that time with them?

As someone who played water polo in college, I'm dying laughing imagining PP's four-year old taking water polo lessons. Lady, you're nuts.

I did too. Where did you play? You didn’t. If you did you would know club activities start at 4/5. You’re a troll and the only point you’ve made is that you’re a troll.

Pathetic

It is pathetic that people care so much about what a 5 year old does for 45 minutes once a week.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m curious how many of these responders have three kids. Everyone I know with three+ kids wouldn’t change it. It’s human nature to adapt. If you have a strong marriage, similar desire for more kids, and means - go for it.

I'm a previous responder, and I have three kids, and my husband and I both work. It's really hard, and I am at a breaking point at least 1-2 times a week, because I feel like I haven't had sufficient 1-1 interaction with my kids (much less my husband). We are generally just cars passing each other in the driveway as we drive the kids to all of their things (our kids are 14, 11, and 8).

Of course I wouldn't change my family - I can't imagine life without my kids! I love watching them grow and I love watching each and every sporting event (maybe not winter swim meets, but oh well!) But I also agree with a previous poster that you need to also think about your own happiness and mental health. There are days when I have basically no time for myself, and despite my husband (who works remotely full-time) pulling a ton of weight, if you're a mom, the likelihood is that you're still going to carry much more of the domestic and emotional load (even, if as in my case, you are the priority breadwinner.)

Again! Wouldn't change my 3 kids. But I worry about my stress and emotional health, and probably as a result of those two things, am prone to yelling when frustrated.

How old are your kids? Do you work from home? I usually can spend at least 30 minutes to multiple hours 1:1 with each kid each day and my kids are 5 and under. Also, my husband and I have a lot of intimacy, talk multiple times a day, and hang out at night. We’re very connected.

DP, but that's because you have very young children still that are napping, going to bed early, and not in extracurriculars. PP said she has 8, 11, and 14 year olds, which is fundamentally different parenting than babies and preschoolers. Try not to sound so smug when you just don't know yet.

None of my children nap and my youngest wakes up multiple times a night.

I think it comes down to what you prioritize.

Oh and my oldest does field hockey on the weekends and during the week gymnastics, swimming, water polo, and tennis. My child is swimming and gymnastics.

Not trying to sound smug but as your children get older it should be easier to spend 1:1 time with them and talking to your spouse during the day is about picking up the phone occasionally and chatting…and chatting before bed. If you are chaperoning your kids to activities can’t you talk to them? Isn’t it easier to spend time with your spouse when your kids don’t need constant supervision…and if they are going to be late why can’t you spend any of that time with them?

As someone who played water polo in college, I'm dying laughing imagining PP's four-year old taking water polo lessons. Lady, you're nuts.

I did too. Where did you play? You didn’t. If you did you would know club activities start at 4/5. You’re a troll and the only point you’ve made is that you’re a troll.

Pathetic

Totally agree

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m curious how many of these responders have three kids. Everyone I know with three+ kids wouldn’t change it. It’s human nature to adapt. If you have a strong marriage, similar desire for more kids, and means - go for it.

I'm a previous responder, and I have three kids, and my husband and I both work. It's really hard, and I am at a breaking point at least 1-2 times a week, because I feel like I haven't had sufficient 1-1 interaction with my kids (much less my husband). We are generally just cars passing each other in the driveway as we drive the kids to all of their things (our kids are 14, 11, and 8).

Of course I wouldn't change my family - I can't imagine life without my kids! I love watching them grow and I love watching each and every sporting event (maybe not winter swim meets, but oh well!) But I also agree with a previous poster that you need to also think about your own happiness and mental health. There are days when I have basically no time for myself, and despite my husband (who works remotely full-time) pulling a ton of weight, if you're a mom, the likelihood is that you're still going to carry much more of the domestic and emotional load (even, if as in my case, you are the priority breadwinner.)

Again! Wouldn't change my 3 kids. But I worry about my stress and emotional health, and probably as a result of those two things, am prone to yelling when frustrated.

How old are your kids? Do you work from home? I usually can spend at least 30 minutes to multiple hours 1:1 with each kid each day and my kids are 5 and under. Also, my husband and I have a lot of intimacy, talk multiple times a day, and hang out at night. We’re very connected.

DP, but that's because you have very young children still that are napping, going to bed early, and not in extracurriculars. PP said she has 8, 11, and 14 year olds, which is fundamentally different parenting than babies and preschoolers. Try not to sound so smug when you just don't know yet.

None of my children nap and my youngest wakes up multiple times a night.

I think it comes down to what you prioritize.

Oh and my oldest does field hockey on the weekends and during the week gymnastics, swimming, water polo, and tennis. My child is swimming and gymnastics.

Not trying to sound smug but as your children get older it should be easier to spend 1:1 time with them and talking to your spouse during the day is about picking up the phone occasionally and chatting…and chatting before bed. If you are chaperoning your kids to activities can’t you talk to them? Isn’t it easier to spend time with your spouse when your kids don’t need constant supervision…and if they are going to be late why can’t you spend any of that time with them?

As someone who played water polo in college, I'm dying laughing imagining PP's four-year old taking water polo lessons. Lady, you're nuts.

I did too. Where did you play? You didn’t. If you did you would know club activities start at 4/5. You’re a troll and the only point you’ve made is that you’re a troll.

Pathetic

Totally agree

Gross that people like you are so insecure that you are tripping over yourself to prove that 5 year olds don’t play water polo or field hockey. Stay bothered.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m curious how many of these responders have three kids. Everyone I know with three+ kids wouldn’t change it. It’s human nature to adapt. If you have a strong marriage, similar desire for more kids, and means - go for it.

I'm a previous responder, and I have three kids, and my husband and I both work. It's really hard, and I am at a breaking point at least 1-2 times a week, because I feel like I haven't had sufficient 1-1 interaction with my kids (much less my husband). We are generally just cars passing each other in the driveway as we drive the kids to all of their things (our kids are 14, 11, and 8).

Of course I wouldn't change my family - I can't imagine life without my kids! I love watching them grow and I love watching each and every sporting event (maybe not winter swim meets, but oh well!) But I also agree with a previous poster that you need to also think about your own happiness and mental health. There are days when I have basically no time for myself, and despite my husband (who works remotely full-time) pulling a ton of weight, if you're a mom, the likelihood is that you're still going to carry much more of the domestic and emotional load (even, if as in my case, you are the priority breadwinner.)

Again! Wouldn't change my 3 kids. But I worry about my stress and emotional health, and probably as a result of those two things, am prone to yelling when frustrated.

How old are your kids? Do you work from home? I usually can spend at least 30 minutes to multiple hours 1:1 with each kid each day and my kids are 5 and under. Also, my husband and I have a lot of intimacy, talk multiple times a day, and hang out at night. We’re very connected.

DP, but that's because you have very young children still that are napping, going to bed early, and not in extracurriculars. PP said she has 8, 11, and 14 year olds, which is fundamentally different parenting than babies and preschoolers. Try not to sound so smug when you just don't know yet.

None of my children nap and my youngest wakes up multiple times a night.

I think it comes down to what you prioritize.

Oh and my oldest does field hockey on the weekends and during the week gymnastics, swimming, water polo, and tennis. My child is swimming and gymnastics.

Not trying to sound smug but as your children get older it should be easier to spend 1:1 time with them and talking to your spouse during the day is about picking up the phone occasionally and chatting…and chatting before bed. If you are chaperoning your kids to activities can’t you talk to them? Isn’t it easier to spend time with your spouse when your kids don’t need constant supervision…and if they are going to be late why can’t you spend any of that time with them?

As someone who played water polo in college, I'm dying laughing imagining PP's four-year old taking water polo lessons. Lady, you're nuts.

I did too. Where did you play? You didn’t. If you did you would know club activities start at 4/5. You’re a troll and the only point you’ve made is that you’re a troll.

Pathetic

Totally agree

Gross that people like you are so insecure that you are tripping over yourself to prove that 5 year olds don’t play water polo or field hockey. Stay bothered.

Like totally gross 🤮

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:I’m curious how many of these responders have three kids. Everyone I know with three+ kids wouldn’t change it. It’s human nature to adapt. If you have a strong marriage, similar desire for more kids, and means - go for it.

I'm a previous responder, and I have three kids, and my husband and I both work. It's really hard, and I am at a breaking point at least 1-2 times a week, because I feel like I haven't had sufficient 1-1 interaction with my kids (much less my husband). We are generally just cars passing each other in the driveway as we drive the kids to all of their things (our kids are 14, 11, and 8).

Of course I wouldn't change my family - I can't imagine life without my kids! I love watching them grow and I love watching each and every sporting event (maybe not winter swim meets, but oh well!) But I also agree with a previous poster that you need to also think about your own happiness and mental health. There are days when I have basically no time for myself, and despite my husband (who works remotely full-time) pulling a ton of weight, if you're a mom, the likelihood is that you're still going to carry much more of the domestic and emotional load (even, if as in my case, you are the priority breadwinner.)

Again! Wouldn't change my 3 kids. But I worry about my stress and emotional health, and probably as a result of those two things, am prone to yelling when frustrated.

How old are your kids? Do you work from home? I usually can spend at least 30 minutes to multiple hours 1:1 with each kid each day and my kids are 5 and under. Also, my husband and I have a lot of intimacy, talk multiple times a day, and hang out at night. We’re very connected.

DP, but that's because you have very young children still that are napping, going to bed early, and not in extracurriculars. PP said she has 8, 11, and 14 year olds, which is fundamentally different parenting than babies and preschoolers. Try not to sound so smug when you just don't know yet.

None of my children nap and my youngest wakes up multiple times a night.

I think it comes down to what you prioritize.

Oh and my oldest does field hockey on the weekends and during the week gymnastics, swimming, water polo, and tennis. My child is swimming and gymnastics.

Not trying to sound smug but as your children get older it should be easier to spend 1:1 time with them and talking to your spouse during the day is about picking up the phone occasionally and chatting…and chatting before bed. If you are chaperoning your kids to activities can’t you talk to them? Isn’t it easier to spend time with your spouse when your kids don’t need constant supervision…and if they are going to be late why can’t you spend any of that time with them?

As someone who played water polo in college, I'm dying laughing imagining PP's four-year old taking water polo lessons. Lady, you're nuts.

I did too. Where did you play? You didn’t. If you did you would know club activities start at 4/5. You’re a troll and the only point you’ve made is that you’re a troll.

engaging in "club activities" <> training/playing a sport

+1. This a ridiculous, easily googleable question. There are no water polo teams for 4-5 year olds in the DMV. Kids do swim lessons at 4-5, start swim team at 6-7 (at the earliest), and can add or switch to water polo around 9-10. PP either doesn't live in the DMV is is a troll.

😂

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m curious how many of these responders have three kids. Everyone I know with three+ kids wouldn’t change it. It’s human nature to adapt. If you have a strong marriage, similar desire for more kids, and means - go for it.

I'm a previous responder, and I have three kids, and my husband and I both work. It's really hard, and I am at a breaking point at least 1-2 times a week, because I feel like I haven't had sufficient 1-1 interaction with my kids (much less my husband). We are generally just cars passing each other in the driveway as we drive the kids to all of their things (our kids are 14, 11, and 8).

Of course I wouldn't change my family - I can't imagine life without my kids! I love watching them grow and I love watching each and every sporting event (maybe not winter swim meets, but oh well!) But I also agree with a previous poster that you need to also think about your own happiness and mental health. There are days when I have basically no time for myself, and despite my husband (who works remotely full-time) pulling a ton of weight, if you're a mom, the likelihood is that you're still going to carry much more of the domestic and emotional load (even, if as in my case, you are the priority breadwinner.)

Again! Wouldn't change my 3 kids. But I worry about my stress and emotional health, and probably as a result of those two things, am prone to yelling when frustrated.

How old are your kids? Do you work from home? I usually can spend at least 30 minutes to multiple hours 1:1 with each kid each day and my kids are 5 and under. Also, my husband and I have a lot of intimacy, talk multiple times a day, and hang out at night. We’re very connected.

DP, but that's because you have very young children still that are napping, going to bed early, and not in extracurriculars. PP said she has 8, 11, and 14 year olds, which is fundamentally different parenting than babies and preschoolers. Try not to sound so smug when you just don't know yet.

None of my children nap and my youngest wakes up multiple times a night.

I think it comes down to what you prioritize.

Oh and my oldest does field hockey on the weekends and during the week gymnastics, swimming, water polo, and tennis. My child is swimming and gymnastics.

Not trying to sound smug but as your children get older it should be easier to spend 1:1 time with them and talking to your spouse during the day is about picking up the phone occasionally and chatting…and chatting before bed. If you are chaperoning your kids to activities can’t you talk to them? Isn’t it easier to spend time with your spouse when your kids don’t need constant supervision…and if they are going to be late why can’t you spend any of that time with them?

As someone who played water polo in college, I'm dying laughing imagining PP's four-year old taking water polo lessons. Lady, you're nuts.

I did too. Where did you play? You didn’t. If you did you would know club activities start at 4/5. You’re a troll and the only point you’ve made is that you’re a troll.

Pathetic

Totally agree

Gross that people like you are so insecure that you are tripping over yourself to prove that 5 year olds don’t play water polo or field hockey. Stay bothered.

Like totally gross 🤮

I’m loving how threatened you feel. What is it like to know that kids all over the country are miles ahead of your kids?

[Anonymous]

Apparently Sarah pahlin and the hockey moms have nothing on these fierce water polo moms 😂 😂