I'm living abroad in the UK and I hate it.

[Anonymous]

Sad to read as this is my dream but I agree with the 'become a regular' suggestion. Your classes will help but if you have a hobby/passion - indulge it. Do the little town gatherings you'll hear about - even if they seem like they're lame. Get known as someone outside of large shops, etc.

[Anonymous]

Is it also miserably cold there as well?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Sad to read as this is my dream but I agree with the 'become a regular' suggestion. Your classes will help but if you have a hobby/passion - indulge it. Do the little town gatherings you'll hear about - even if they seem like they're lame. Get known as someone outside of large shops, etc.

It's your dream to live in the UK? Why? And what part would you live in?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Is it also miserably cold there as well?

No, the weather is generally mild where I am. I like the weather okay. It does get cold in the winter, but nothing like DC.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Where are you - I lived for several years in the U.K., and location is important. The best bit of advice I can give you is try to think how you might love like a British person rather than an American person. It can be very expensive to try to replicate the American lifestyle in the U.K. The other thing is to become a regular somewhere. Once they realize you're not a tourist, some of the doors open to you.

I think I know what you mean, but can you give me some examples? I walk everywhere here or take a bus. I don't drive here. I actually found it fun incorporating aspects of the British lifestyle (at first). But now everything feels overly complicate.

I'm in southeast England (Kent). What part did you live in? I've thought about maybe frequenting a neighborhood pub, but I don't really drink. Maybe a coffee shop? I'm not sure. But that's a good idea. I'm taking some graduate level classes here starting next week, so that might help.

Things like - you don't try to buy jugs of orange juice for breakfast, you think about buying things in different quantities, you figure out that people actually eat premade sandwiches from Sainsbury's and they're not half bad and the price is reasonable. Don't do conversions in your head - figure that a pound buys you in pounds what a dollar gets you in dollars and read the prices that way.

A pub is a good idea, and don't forget most pubs serve some kind of food. In my case, in Oxfordshire, there was a little restaurant in it town, which is overrun by tourists in the summer. We would go sometimes and in the beginning the service would be kind of surly. Then we popped in one Tuesday night in the middle of February and really started chatting with the server. It came out that we lived there and weren't tourists who would disappear, and suddenly we were recognized when we went in and we had people to talk to.

Join an activity or a society that does something you like. I joined a music group, any my DH did a sport. Also, if you are work eligible, get a job.

The orange juice comment is obscure. I'm not sure what you mean. I can get all my groceries delivered by Tesco for a few pound a month. I can buy a jug of orange juice for a couple pounds and have it delivered to me. And I don't like the premade sandwiches. It's must more cost effective and tastes better to make my own at home. Money isn't really an issue. I just use my CC for everything and leave it to them to do the conversions.

What I meant by the OJ comment was that when I got there, some other colleagues were complaining that their fridge was too small, they couldn't find peanut butter or marshmallows, and it was ungodly expensive to buy the half gallon of OJ their teen drank each day at home. They wanted to live like they did in the US (I guess OJ isn't a luxury item any more). And for the sandwiches, I was trying to get at the point of shop, spend, and eat like the locals do - that stuff is going to be less expensive as related to your income than doing it the American way. Also, if you're not working, why are you having groceries delivered? Go to the town center to shop and stop in for a coffee every couple days while doing the shopping. Don't go to an exercise class, people don't connect there, go to the flower society or the homeless volunteering organization, or something where you have to talk to people.

And if your SO is there, why isn't s/he connecting you with their friends?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Where are you - I lived for several years in the U.K., and location is important. The best bit of advice I can give you is try to think how you might love like a British person rather than an American person. It can be very expensive to try to replicate the American lifestyle in the U.K. The other thing is to become a regular somewhere. Once they realize you're not a tourist, some of the doors open to you.

I think I know what you mean, but can you give me some examples? I walk everywhere here or take a bus. I don't drive here. I actually found it fun incorporating aspects of the British lifestyle (at first). But now everything feels overly complicate.

I'm in southeast England (Kent). What part did you live in? I've thought about maybe frequenting a neighborhood pub, but I don't really drink. Maybe a coffee shop? I'm not sure. But that's a good idea. I'm taking some graduate level classes here starting next week, so that might help.

Things like - you don't try to buy jugs of orange juice for breakfast, you think about buying things in different quantities, you figure out that people actually eat premade sandwiches from Sainsbury's and they're not half bad and the price is reasonable. Don't do conversions in your head - figure that a pound buys you in pounds what a dollar gets you in dollars and read the prices that way.

A pub is a good idea, and don't forget most pubs serve some kind of food. In my case, in Oxfordshire, there was a little restaurant in it town, which is overrun by tourists in the summer. We would go sometimes and in the beginning the service would be kind of surly. Then we popped in one Tuesday night in the middle of February and really started chatting with the server. It came out that we lived there and weren't tourists who would disappear, and suddenly we were recognized when we went in and we had people to talk to.

Join an activity or a society that does something you like. I joined a music group, any my DH did a sport. Also, if you are work eligible, get a job.

The orange juice comment is obscure. I'm not sure what you mean. I can get all my groceries delivered by Tesco for a few pound a month. I can buy a jug of orange juice for a couple pounds and have it delivered to me. And I don't like the premade sandwiches. It's must more cost effective and tastes better to make my own at home. Money isn't really an issue. I just use my CC for everything and leave it to them to do the conversions.

What I meant by the OJ comment was that when I got there, some other colleagues were complaining that their fridge was too small, they couldn't find peanut butter or marshmallows, and it was ungodly expensive to buy the half gallon of OJ their teen drank each day at home. They wanted to live like they did in the US (I guess OJ isn't a luxury item any more). And for the sandwiches, I was trying to get at the point of shop, spend, and eat like the locals do - that stuff is going to be less expensive as related to your income than doing it the American way. Also, if you're not working, why are you having groceries delivered? Go to the town center to shop and stop in for a coffee every couple days while doing the shopping. Don't go to an exercise class, people don't connect there, go to the flower society or the homeless volunteering organization, or something where you have to talk to people.

And if your SO is there, why isn't s/he connecting you with their friends?

I will still pop into the Tesco up the street sometimes, but for the big grocery shop, I like to get it delivered. I don't want to lug all that back by myself. It's too much to carry and the sidewalks here are honestly dangerous. So are the roads. They are not maintained like a lot of streets in the US. And yeah, I get what you meant now. The fridges here are tiny compared to US ones -- which in a way I think is a good thing! American fridges are just massive. The smaller fridges encourage fresh food more often.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The people are rude, the service is bad, the food is bad, you pay more for everything. I am a friendly and polite, respectful person (not a "loud, annoying American). And all anyone ever cares about is how much money they can get out of me. It's exhausting. And the road are not maintained. I had an accident when tripping in a cracked sidewalk. I was visibly hurt and no one would even move over a little bit so I could walk past on the sidewalk (beside them). I had to walk in the road while they walked on the sidewalk. That is a frequently occurrence - people not moving over so you can both have room on the sidewalk.

How long have you been there? This sounds like culture shock, and it's exhausting. I did this the other way around, almost 20 years ago, and it surprised me how much it affected me. You wouldn't think it would; I had assumed that there would be minimal cultural differences between two English speaking countries which share a good deal of common references. But it kind of sneaks up on you, and suddenly everything. is. hard.

[Anonymous]

No one is holding a gun to you head making you stay.

[Anonymous]

My sibling just moved over there. They don't love it.

[Anonymous]

I can't relate and I live in the UK.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The people are rude, the service is bad, the food is bad, you pay more for everything. I am a friendly and polite, respectful person (not a "loud, annoying American). And all anyone ever cares about is how much money they can get out of me. It's exhausting. And the road are not maintained. I had an accident when tripping in a cracked sidewalk. I was visibly hurt and no one would even move over a little bit so I could walk past on the sidewalk (beside them). I had to walk in the road while they walked on the sidewalk. That is a frequently occurrence - people not moving over so you can both have room on the sidewalk.

How long have you been there? This sounds like culture shock, and it's exhausting. I did this the other way around, almost 20 years ago, and it surprised me how much it affected me. You wouldn't think it would; I had assumed that there would be minimal cultural differences between two English speaking countries which share a good deal of common references. But it kind of sneaks up on you, and suddenly everything. is. hard.

I was there 6 months last year and now I've been back 4 months. I don't feel like it's culture shock at this point. I get that the British "love to have a moan" about things. But it's honestly so negative most of the time and it is wearing on me. Are you saying you're British and moved to the US? My SO is British and we've been together 5 years. I get along well with his family, etc but he's often gone at work and I have to try to integrate myself on my own and some days it is really hard.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My sibling just moved over there. They don't love it.

What part did they move to and what do they not like?

[Anonymous]

http://wiki.c2.com/?ParableOfTheTwoVillages

Read and profit thereby, OP

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I can't relate and I live in the UK.

+1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The people are rude, the service is bad, the food is bad, you pay more for everything. I am a friendly and polite, respectful person (not a "loud, annoying American). And all anyone ever cares about is how much money they can get out of me. It's exhausting. And the road are not maintained. I had an accident when tripping in a cracked sidewalk. I was visibly hurt and no one would even move over a little bit so I could walk past on the sidewalk (beside them). I had to walk in the road while they walked on the sidewalk. That is a frequently occurrence - people not moving over so you can both have room on the sidewalk.

That was my experience in the U.K. as well. Except for Indian food. It's fantastic. Surprisingly I found the French to be nicer overall.