Partner said I’m not super attractive

[Anonymous]

OP here. We broke up.

I haven’t been on here but I read the last comment and I’m very confused. I’m of married and I don’t have kids. I’m not sure where the newly pregnant or just given birth comments are from.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Tbh I'm mortified that so many ppl feel comfortable telling a woman who just had a baby and confirmed she has pp that she should leave her DH because of this.

You're awful awful people. Are you so removed from having a weeks old baby that you don't know that BOTH of the new parents are probably reeling - her esp but just in general this is a very stressful sleepless time.

Please OP. Get some sleep and help if you can. Maybe have a family member or good friend come over and just give you a break to take a real shower, eat a real meal and get some hours of true sleep. I almost divorced my DH during the first year and it was hell. But we got through it. We were both irrational. And even if the issue is valid - it shouldn't be end of relationship defining and I promise you both can compromise and come up with a plan.

FWIW - I had a cat at the same time and she hated my baby. Never did like him but stayed away / kept to herself until she died of old age when my DS was 3. The advice of the vet (your bf handling everything) is sound and also talking it out. Your bf doesn't love the cat more than you and baby. And you don't want the cat thrown in the garbage. There's some middle ground. And at the end of the day if the cat is aggressive and needs to be re-homed, it should be a mutual decision after at least some compromise on how to handle it now.

OP here. I think you wrote on the wrong post. I’m not married and I don’t have any kids or a cat.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What I struggle with as a man is when my wife complains that she's not as attractive as she used to be. Since my options are to either agree with her or lie to her I try to say as little as possible. For what it's worth she looks great for her age and I'm still attracted to her - we're just not the young people we were when we met.

"Hon, you are [age], and you still look hot."

This is not hard.

This.
“Babe—you still float my boat!”
“As far as I’m concerned—you still got it, honey!”

Any variation of “I’m still into you” is all you need here.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Lay off the porn. Those breasts are not real. In fact, spoiler alert, many women around here have fake boobs, too.

That doesn’t mean yours aren’t better. They just aren’t fake.

Tell him to lay off the porn and stop comparing you to AI enhanced actresses if he doesn’t want to be compared to a high end vibrator.

Dislike terms like “not real” and “fake boobs”. Those with enhanced figures shouldn’t be made to feel less as a result of their surgery. Often this is a choice made to feel better about one’s body, not worse!

A mean,…but they *aren’t* real…and they *are* fake, so…..

I don’t get this new obsession with forcing everyone else to get on board with adopting language that denies truth just because reality is uncomfortable for you.

You can choose to get a boob job if you want to/need to, of course—but why is it necessary to your happiness for everyone else pretend those are your natural boobs???
Truth is truth.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. We broke up.

I haven’t been on here but I read the last comment and I’m very confused. I’m of married and I don’t have kids. I’m not sure where the newly pregnant or just given birth comments are from.

Hi OP, thats good news.

How did he take it?

Wish you all the best.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Lay off the porn. Those breasts are not real. In fact, spoiler alert, many women around here have fake boobs, too.

That doesn’t mean yours aren’t better. They just aren’t fake.

Tell him to lay off the porn and stop comparing you to AI enhanced actresses if he doesn’t want to be compared to a high end vibrator.

Dislike terms like “not real” and “fake boobs”. Those with enhanced figures shouldn’t be made to feel less as a result of their surgery. Often this is a choice made to feel better about one’s body, not worse!

A mean,…but they *aren’t* real…and they *are* fake, so…..

I don’t get this new obsession with forcing everyone else to get on board with adopting language that denies truth just because reality is uncomfortable for you.

You can choose to get a boob job if you want to/need to, of course—but why is it necessary to your happiness for everyone else pretend those are your natural boobs???
Truth is truth.

Do you go around telling women that their hair color is fake? That their skin isn’t real because of makeup? That their whitened teeth are false? No, that would be rude.

Truth is truth, and truth is you’re a jerk.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. We broke up.

I haven’t been on here but I read the last comment and I’m very confused. I’m of married and I don’t have kids. I’m not sure where the newly pregnant or just given birth comments are from.

NP. You did the right thing. Sounded like he did not appreciate you, as you deserved to be.

I can’t imagine critiquing my spouse’s physical attributes. As they say, the whole is greater than the sum of its parts. It’s the whole person that I love.

[Anonymous]

Wow. I think you did the right thing because for whatever reason you weren’t compatible with each other.

BUT - you asked and you pushed it! I have had a similar conversation in similar circumstances and it shows his comfort and closeness. We talk about all kinds of things. If you’re watching p0rn you’re both aware that neither one of you looks like those on the screen and you are already in a close and vulnerable situation. You started a conversation about preferences in the abstract and you forgot that he was choosing you over some huge-boobed plastic person and he comes home to you. I love his older mushy bits, but of course I’d like to in theory play with a perfect six pack.

You didn’t really love him, and that’s okay. That’s why you date - to find the person where you can have that kind of conversation and not feel offended.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Lay off the porn. Those breasts are not real. In fact, spoiler alert, many women around here have fake boobs, too.

That doesn’t mean yours aren’t better. They just aren’t fake.

Tell him to lay off the porn and stop comparing you to AI enhanced actresses if he doesn’t want to be compared to a high end vibrator.

Dislike terms like “not real” and “fake boobs”. Those with enhanced figures shouldn’t be made to feel less as a result of their surgery. Often this is a choice made to feel better about one’s body, not worse!

You don’t have to like the terms, but if you have them, you chose to literally put silicone in your boobs.

At least be honest.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. We broke up.

I haven’t been on here but I read the last comment and I’m very confused. I’m of married and I don’t have kids. I’m not sure where the newly pregnant or just given birth comments are from.

Good luck out there! You’ll find someone who doesn’t compare you to other people constantly.

Maturity helps with this. Some things are a think it, not a say it.

It can take men a long time to learn this.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You both sound shallow.

I don't think it's shallow for a woman to not want her partner to say to her that "I don't find you super attractive".

I'm not super attractive, neither is DH. But, I would never say that to him, or vice versa. DH says I'm beautiful all the time, but I know he knows that I'm not super attractive.

Someone who says that to a person that they supposedly love is just mean.

How did this happen, OP? Were you asking questions and pressing? Was he drunk? Were you arguing? Or ???

OP here. We were watching P@rn and he was watching one with big breasts and I said those look like mine and he said
“ no, hers are better. I jokingly said
“ what..you don’t like mine” and he said that they weren’t the best he’s had but he likes them. I did pry and he told me it’s okay because he’s sure there’s things that I don’t like about him. Then he said I wasn’t as attractive as his previous partners but I’m the nicest and have the best personality. I got mad and left.

I mean, he was rude, but why were you digging for complements like that? I mean, I KNOW I'm not the most attractive person my parter has been with, but I sure as hell DO have the best personality, am the kindest, and I know those things are a heck of a lot more important than the fact that I have perfect breasts. I'm the person he wants to be with, not a pair of perfect breasts.

[Anonymous]

Good for you, OP. You sound like an awesome person. You deserve a man who will make you feel amazing all the time. It is possible to be honest and also make your partner feel wonderful about themselves. It’s both partners’ job to do this for each other in a relationship.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Lay off the porn. Those breasts are not real. In fact, spoiler alert, many women around here have fake boobs, too.

That doesn’t mean yours aren’t better. They just aren’t fake.

Tell him to lay off the porn and stop comparing you to AI enhanced actresses if he doesn’t want to be compared to a high end vibrator.

Dislike terms like “not real” and “fake boobs”. Those with enhanced figures shouldn’t be made to feel less as a result of their surgery. Often this is a choice made to feel better about one’s body, not worse!

A mean,…but they *aren’t* real…and they *are* fake, so…..

I don’t get this new obsession with forcing everyone else to get on board with adopting language that denies truth just because reality is uncomfortable for you.

You can choose to get a boob job if you want to/need to, of course—but why is it necessary to your happiness for everyone else pretend those are your natural boobs???
Truth is truth.

Boobs with implants are not fake. The muscular, fat and nipple tissue remains there. Silicone is not injected into a boob or instead of a previously existed boob. It’s placed behind the muscular tissue and a well done boob looks and feels natural. Because it’s still the same boob, just “raised” on its pillow !

So stop calling boobs fake - they are enhanced but not fake. You don’t tell people with dental implants that their teeth are “fake”, or those with leg prosthetics, right?

I get you have a fixation on boobs as these women would look more attractive to men. Yes, men love great looking boobs regardless if there is an under muscle implant there or not. That is just the fact.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Lay off the porn. Those breasts are not real. In fact, spoiler alert, many women around here have fake boobs, too.

That doesn’t mean yours aren’t better. They just aren’t fake.

Tell him to lay off the porn and stop comparing you to AI enhanced actresses if he doesn’t want to be compared to a high end vibrator.

Dislike terms like “not real” and “fake boobs”. Those with enhanced figures shouldn’t be made to feel less as a result of their surgery. Often this is a choice made to feel better about one’s body, not worse!

A mean,…but they *aren’t* real…and they *are* fake, so…..

I don’t get this new obsession with forcing everyone else to get on board with adopting language that denies truth just because reality is uncomfortable for you.

You can choose to get a boob job if you want to/need to, of course—but why is it necessary to your happiness for everyone else pretend those are your natural boobs???
Truth is truth.

Boobs with implants are not fake. The muscular, fat and nipple tissue remains there. Silicone is not injected into a boob or instead of a previously existed boob. It’s placed behind the muscular tissue and a well done boob looks and feels natural. Because it’s still the same boob, just “raised” on its pillow !

So stop calling boobs fake - they are enhanced but not fake. You don’t tell people with dental implants that their teeth are “fake”, or those with leg prosthetics, right?

I get you have a fixation on boobs as these women would look more attractive to men. Yes, men love great looking boobs regardless if there is an under muscle implant there or not. That is just the fact.

NP. Why are you so defensive? People will think whatever they want and you cannot change that. But you can change your attitude and not care what people think about you or your body.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Lay off the porn. Those breasts are not real. In fact, spoiler alert, many women around here have fake boobs, too.

That doesn’t mean yours aren’t better. They just aren’t fake.

Tell him to lay off the porn and stop comparing you to AI enhanced actresses if he doesn’t want to be compared to a high end vibrator.

Dislike terms like “not real” and “fake boobs”. Those with enhanced figures shouldn’t be made to feel less as a result of their surgery. Often this is a choice made to feel better about one’s body, not worse!

A mean,…but they *aren’t* real…and they *are* fake, so…..

I don’t get this new obsession with forcing everyone else to get on board with adopting language that denies truth just because reality is uncomfortable for you.

You can choose to get a boob job if you want to/need to, of course—but why is it necessary to your happiness for everyone else pretend those are your natural boobs???
Truth is truth.

Boobs with implants are not fake. The muscular, fat and nipple tissue remains there. Silicone is not injected into a boob or instead of a previously existed boob. It’s placed behind the muscular tissue and a well done boob looks and feels natural. Because it’s still the same boob, just “raised” on its pillow !

So stop calling boobs fake - they are enhanced but not fake. You don’t tell people with dental implants that their teeth are “fake”, or those with leg prosthetics, right?

I get you have a fixation on boobs as these women would look more attractive to men. Yes, men love great looking boobs regardless if there is an under muscle implant there or not. That is just the fact.

NP. Why are you so defensive? People will think whatever they want and you cannot change that. But you can change your attitude and not care what people think about you or your body.

The lady should then tell all elderly people their teeth are fake; people with pace makers their hearts are fake etc.

It’s fascinating how harsh are women on something that other women do to feel better about their bodies and improve confidence.

“Fake boobs” is just untrue from physical standpoint and carries negative connotation. Whereby the implants help improve quality of life to many women who had breast deformities, breast cancers, breast messed up by childbirth and breast feeding etc.