CVS and Target have entire aisles of candy bunnies and eggs. How can you not have noticed? |
Because it's the same stuff they always have just packaged for Easter, have you not noticed the similarities? |
Talk about burying the lede. DUI? If true you need to get her busted. |
Actually, if you read carefully the OP has avoided stating whether it contained the allergen, was a “may contain” or a “processed on shared equipment”. If you have an allergic kid you know that many allergists advocate a different level of risk tolerance to these different labels, and OP hasn’t said which it was. For my dangerously allergic child, we allow “shared equipment” or “may contain trace” if we are in our own home (with every level of response available to us and 11 minutes from an ER). Our allergist endorses this approach. So no, we don’t know that this candy was necessarily dangerous. |
You need to fix this. Are you still in court? Have the court appoint a parenting coordinator, or require family therapy of BOTH parents (the judge will not require something of mom that they don't also require of you). Ask the court for a parenting coordinator - this person will not be on your side, they will simply facilitate communication and decisionmaking. I'm sorry it's part of a bigger pattern, and that driving while intoxicated is an issue. Document those, raise them with the GAL (with no emotion if possible - the GAL doesn't give a damn how you feel about anything), and do your best. As parents, we cannot prevent our children from ever being at risk. It's scary and upsetting, but there isn't anything you can do about some things. Get yourself a therapist so that you can learn to manage your own anxiety. |
OP is specifically being vague. It would actually be helpful for OP to share the information for other concerned allergy parents, like "hey PSA, avoid this candy, we almost found out the hard way" that it contains nuts. Curious OP won't do that. |
I don't think your child has a very severe allergy if your allergist has told him it isn't dangerous at all for him and he can eat "may contain' or "shared equipment" foods. That is great but for a lot of kids / and adults, they can't eat the may contain or shared equipment food because that too is dangerous. I am sure OP knows his child just like you know yours and had a reason for concern. |
Classic troll move, actually. |
Ding ding. |
Our allergist didn’t say it isn’t dangerous, he said it is a manageable risk to eat shared equipment (not “may contain”) in a controlled environment. It’s possible mom thinks shared equipment in her own home is manageable risk, and dad disagrees, but OP is avoiding the question. |
Most people are not concerned at all for daughter. That everyone makes mistakes and its not an issue at all to give your child a safe food that has an allergen in it. So it doesn't seem most feel any need to avoid it. Daughter needs to always check so its all on her. That the only issue is OP being anxious about it and since it isn't anything to be anxious about, he needs therapy. |
OP, have you never made a mistake….even a bad one?
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Most people with highly allergic kids found out their kid was highly allergic after they— the parent— gave them that food. You can accept humans are fallible or you can live with guilt your whole life, the latter isn’t healthy. |
Yeah, Daddy is “perfect”. |
But if you gave your child a food that you knew they had an allergy too, would you not feel bad afterwards? Knowing your child was upset, would you not try to reassure them - you would just tell them - your fault, should have checked better. |