New live-in for Jewish family

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Ummm ... a mistake? We don't "do" sins. There's a hebrew phrase for something that basically means "an act against God." So maybe it'd be called that. There's another hebrew phrase that means like, "not according to the torah" or more loosely "not the Jewish way."

For those who aren't Jewish, why demand that they practice Jewish beliefs? Shouldn't it be voluntary, not forced?

Well. Because you're just respecting the way the house is run. It's like putting the white laundry in this bag and the dark laundry in that bag. It has nothing to do with praying. It doesn't compromise your beliefs in any way. It's putting these things in one place and those things in another place. You're thinking way too much about the reasoning behind it.

Like some of the other Jewish posters in this thread have said, it doesn't even make sense to them but they do it because it is their religion, you really can't expect someone non-religious to come in and go out of their way to do that. Like you example, if a family told me they separate their laundry by number of pockets on each item I would just throw them all together anyways if I wasn't being watched because it's absolutely ridiculous and doesn't matter.

Then, do not accept the job. Simple.

Poverty. Poor. Take whatever comes your way. Reality.

So just because someone is poor means they should have a poor work ethic too? No wonder they are poor. Just because they can't be choosy for a job doesn't mean they shouldn't do the job well. Maybe if they did it well and got good references they could move on to a better paying job. Being poor is not an excuse for being a bad employee.

[Anonymous]

Would you have anything against simply hiring a Jewish nanny, who would already been be accustomed to your religious practices?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Would you have anything against simply hiring a Jewish nanny, who would already been be accustomed to your religious practices?

I don't keep Kosher but I would be happy to hire a Jewish nanny. I looked for a nanny through our synagogue, through word of mouth and interviewed at least 20 nannies and not a single one of them was Jewish. Unlike some PPs I don't discriminate and found a wonderful nanny who happens to not be Jewish.

[Anonymous]

This is about living with the employer.
not just being their nanny. Being just nanny is different

Based on this thread I do not see how a nanny could be happy living in

What if you want to bring in your own food? Cook when they are fasting, take time off when it is your religious holiday. Go out on Friday night or drive a car on Saturday or carry a bag

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This is about living with the employer.
not just being their nanny. Being just nanny is different

Based on this thread I do not see how a nanny could be happy living in

What if you want to bring in your own food? Cook when they are fasting, take time off when it is your religious holiday. Go out on Friday night or drive a car on Saturday or carry a bag

Even the most observant of Jews don't care what other people do. Ie just because an Orthodox Jew doesn't turn lights on and off during Shabbat doesn't mean a non-Orthodox Jew or non-Jew can't turn lights on and off in the Orthodox home. No one would force a non Jew to follow Jewish customs. Of course the nanny could go out on Friday night and no one would expect her to fast just because the family was. I'd be shocked if the children were fasting anyway. Children under 13 are exempt from that usually so certainly the non-Jewish nanny would not be expected to fast. Nor would she be expected to celebrate the Jewish holidays anymore than a Christian family would expect a non-Christian nanny who loved with them to celebrate Christmas.

[Anonymous]

^^*lived not loved

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This is about living with the employer.
not just being their nanny. Being just nanny is different

Based on this thread I do not see how a nanny could be happy living in

What if you want to bring in your own food? Cook when they are fasting, take time off when it is your religious holiday. Go out on Friday night or drive a car on Saturday or carry a bag

Even if you are living in with somehow who is about as strict as get gets with jewish religious law, most of these things won't be a problem. There's no concept at all in Judaism that non Jews should follow jewish law. (Except done very specific exceptions that would suprise no one, like not killing or stealing)

So, non kosher food in a kosher kitchen is a problem. But, eating on fast days, not following the sabbath, having specific holidays off... Those won't be issues.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Would you have anything against simply hiring a Jewish nanny, who would already been be accustomed to your religious practices?

I don't keep Kosher but I would be happy to hire a Jewish nanny. I looked for a nanny through our synagogue, through word of mouth and interviewed at least 20 nannies and not a single one of them was Jewish. Unlike some PPs I don't discriminate and found a wonderful nanny who happens to not be Jewish.

One would think you could find just about any kind of nanny you wanted, if the price was right. But not Jewish? Why is that?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Would you have anything against simply hiring a Jewish nanny, who would already been be accustomed to your religious practices?

I don't keep Kosher but I would be happy to hire a Jewish nanny. I looked for a nanny through our synagogue, through word of mouth and interviewed at least 20 nannies and not a single one of them was Jewish. Unlike some PPs I don't discriminate and found a wonderful nanny who happens to not be Jewish.

One would think you could find just about any kind of nanny you wanted, if the price was right. But not Jewish? Why is that?

I really couldn't say. While I would have been happy to have a Jewish nanny I am just as happy with my current non-Jewish nanny. I wasn't specifically looking for a Jewish nanny either but in the 2 months it took to find our current nanny I did not find even 1 Jewish nanny, so maybe it's not so easy to just "simply hire a Jewish nanny."

[Anonymous]

Only tangentially related, but dealing with non-Jews being expected to follow Jewish law, there's actually
jobs within the Jewish community which rely on non Jews. For example, Jews don't turn lights on and off on Shabbat. However, a non-Jewish community member is usually
Employed (ie paid), to turn all synagogue lights off after services on Saturday. You can read more about that here: http://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Shabbos_goy

So, you can see that Jews don't hold everyone to their religious beliefs, nor do they consider those who aren't Jewish to be "sinful".

[Anonymous]

Ask the family lots of question as they arise - every "keeps kosher" differently. They won't think your questions are stupid, they'll appreciate your efforts. Some will allow outside food if it's eaten on paper plates, many will not. Some will read labels of all the foods for a kosher symbol, some will just base it on the basic ingredients. Chances are you'll stick with dairy lunches for the kids because it's easier.

As for kitchen organization, think of it like an office job and filing - if these folders go in that filing cabinet and those office supplies go in that closet, that's where you put them. You don't question the bosses organizational system - you just put things in the assigned place. Same thing in a kosher kitchen.

[Anonymous]

PP who worked for a Jewish family here... I will admit that one of the difficulties is that not all rules are by the book. So that can become confusing at times.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is about living with the employer.
not just being their nanny. Being just nanny is different

Based on this thread I do not see how a nanny could be happy living in

What if you want to bring in your own food? Cook when they are fasting, take time off when it is your religious holiday. Go out on Friday night or drive a car on Saturday or carry a bag

Even if you are living in with somehow who is about as strict as get gets with jewish religious law, most of these things won't be a problem. There's no concept at all in Judaism that non Jews should follow jewish law. (Except done very specific exceptions that would suprise no one, like not killing or stealing)

So, non kosher food in a kosher kitchen is a problem. But, eating on fast days, not following the sabbath, having specific holidays off... Those won't be issues.

So the family will be offended if the nanny buys ham and keeps it in the refridgerator
The family that fasts will not want her to cook herself breakfeast


Can the family not pay more to get a jewish nanny? Sounds like the non-jewish alternative is cheaper

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is about living with the employer.
not just being their nanny. Being just nanny is different

Based on this thread I do not see how a nanny could be happy living in

What if you want to bring in your own food? Cook when they are fasting, take time off when it is your religious holiday. Go out on Friday night or drive a car on Saturday or carry a bag

Even if you are living in with somehow who is about as strict as get gets with jewish religious law, most of these things won't be a problem. There's no concept at all in Judaism that non Jews should follow jewish law. (Except done very specific exceptions that would suprise no one, like not killing or stealing)

So, non kosher food in a kosher kitchen is a problem. But, eating on fast days, not following the sabbath, having specific holidays off... Those won't be issues.

So the family will be offended if the nanny buys ham and keeps it in the refridgerator
The family that fasts will not want her to cook herself breakfeast


Can the family not pay more to get a jewish nanny? Sounds like the non-jewish alternative is cheaper

Can you not read or are you just trying to be difficult. Several PP have said of course she can cook herself breakfast even if the family is fasting. The only thing that MAY be an issue is keeping ham in their fridge but I guess if a nanny really likes ham she wouldn't be a good fit. I'm not kosher but I don't really like ham so it wouldn't really be a big deal to me. Stop trying to make this about money, a Jewish nanny wouldn't charge more so it has nothing to do with what is cheaper.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is about living with the employer.
not just being their nanny. Being just nanny is different

Based on this thread I do not see how a nanny could be happy living in

What if you want to bring in your own food? Cook when they are fasting, take time off when it is your religious holiday. Go out on Friday night or drive a car on Saturday or carry a bag

Even if you are living in with somehow who is about as strict as get gets with jewish religious law, most of these things won't be a problem. There's no concept at all in Judaism that non Jews should follow jewish law. (Except done very specific exceptions that would suprise no one, like not killing or stealing)

So, non kosher food in a kosher kitchen is a problem. But, eating on fast days, not following the sabbath, having specific holidays off... Those won't be issues.

So the family will be offended if the nanny buys ham and keeps it in the refridgerator
The family that fasts will not want her to cook herself breakfeast


Can the family not pay more to get a jewish nanny? Sounds like the non-jewish alternative is cheaper

Can you not read or are you just trying to be difficult. Several PP have said of course she can cook herself breakfast even if the family is fasting. The only thing that MAY be an issue is keeping ham in their fridge but I guess if a nanny really likes ham she wouldn't be a good fit. I'm not kosher but I don't really like ham so it wouldn't really be a big deal to me. Stop trying to make this about money, a Jewish nanny wouldn't charge more so it has nothing to do with what is cheaper.

Have you ever had a Jewish nanny?