Where is this mythical nanny who is never on her phone?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:LOL because NONE of these moms ever spend time on their phone while they're supposed to be taking care of their kids, right?

Nannies are not substitute mothers. It makes no difference to me if my MB spends every waking second of her weekend texting -- I am not her.

I only text/talk during my lunch break when the kids are asleep. I hate seeing nannies and mothers on their phone constantly when I am out with my charges.

What makes you think a primary caregiver nanny isn't a substitute mother?

"Mother" is a relationship. A life-long relationship. "Nanny" is a job. A job with a limited time frame of the early years only.

Thoughtful Mothers *hope* that Nanny is also a relationship. If Nanny and your child aren't in a firm relationship, you have big problems ahead. Mark my words.

OF COURSE, nannies should have loving and nurturing relationships with our children - but that does not make them pretend mothers/substitute mothers! My nanny and DS are very bonded but she doesn't feel that she is his substitute mother and neither do I. Our relationships with my child are very different.

If she's providing the care of your child more of his waking hours than you are, then she's very much serving as his substitute mother. There's no getting around simple facts. Sorry.

Hmmm, I've never done the math and my youngest is now in school 4hrs a day, but even when he wasn't, the nanny never spent more waking hrs with them than I did. If that actually was the case I'd be afraid my kid had a sleep disorder and would need medical attention.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
LOL because NONE of these moms ever spend time on their phone while they're supposed to be taking care of their kids, right?



Nannies are not substitute mothers. It makes no difference to me if my MB spends every waking second of her weekend texting -- I am not her.

I only text/talk during my lunch break when the kids are asleep. I hate seeing nannies and mothers on their phone constantly when I am out with my charges.

What makes you think a primary caregiver nanny isn't a substitute mother?



"Mother" is a relationship. A life-long relationship. "Nanny" is a job. A job with a limited time frame of the early years only.

Thoughtful Mothers *hope* that Nanny is also a relationship. If Nanny and your child aren't in a firm relationship, you have big problems ahead. Mark my words.



OF COURSE, nannies should have loving and nurturing relationships with our children - but that does not make them pretend mothers/substitute mothers! My nanny and DS are very bonded but she doesn't feel that she is his substitute mother and neither do I. Our relationships with my child are very different.

If she's providing the care of your child more of his waking hours than you are, then she's very much serving as his substitute mother. There's no getting around simple facts. Sorry.

A nanny is never a substitute mother. A nanny is one of many important short term caregivers over the course of a child's life. There's no getting around simple facts. Sorry.