Severance advice

[Anonymous]

Hi we are first time parents and our current nanny who was wonderful leaves us tomorrow after being with us for almost 3 years, our daughter is going to full day camp. Do we give her a severance even though she is moving onto another family right away?

[Anonymous]

You don’t need to give severance if she had notice of her end date.
After 3 years though a parting monetary gift would be nice and appreciated.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You don’t need to give severance if she had notice of her end date.
After 3 years though a parting monetary gift would be nice and appreciated.

Give her nothing and a thank you!

[Anonymous]

I would give her a week or two.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You don’t need to give severance if she had notice of her end date.
After 3 years though a parting monetary gift would be nice and appreciated.

You are not required to give her severance pay however a financial check or ca$h in an amount you can afford to give would be a testament to how much she was appreciated the last three years.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You don’t need to give severance if she had notice of her end date.
After 3 years though a parting monetary gift would be nice and appreciated.

You are not required to give her severance pay however a financial check or ca$h in an amount you can afford to give would be a testament to how much she was appreciated the last three years.

OP here! She’s not asking for anything I do know from questions I asked her references before hiring her she was given appreciation bonus at the end of their contract. Anyway, decided to gift her donuts and a card telling her how we appreciate her.

[Anonymous]

We give a week per year of working if we are terminating. If they quit, they get paid out any unused but accrued vacation days (rounded up to the full day).

Since you are letting her go due to putting your child in school, you should give severance. Donuts and a card are lame.

[Anonymous]

Hello OP, This truly comes from a genuine place and I hope you can take this advice with grace. The fact that you ask on this platform yourself about whether you should give severance pay shows that you must feel that this person who you yourself say has been loyal to your family and you’ve been happy with, shows that you at least don’t think gifting her with money would be a waste or bad decision. You also confirm that she did not ask for it which means she is not entitled. You also confirm that her references mentioned how wonderful she is and that they gave her a cash bonus. Others have also chimed in to share why giving a loyal nanny cash bonus isn’t a bad idea and that you can give what you can afford. To then come back and post that you just gave her donuts and a card would personally make me question what was the point in posting your inquiry and whether you do appreciate this person’s service to your family? Personally no matter how large or small the amount of money is, gifting a loyal and highly recommended nanny that you are letting go would only be the right thing to do. What are donuts going to do for someone who’s probably either stressing about finding her next job or worried about how the new job will pan out long term wise or even how to make it to her first pay check. Ask yourself how you would feel receiving something that may not be functional after committing to a job. And maybe you may say you wouldn’t be affected or bothered and list why that is but understand that if you don’t work as a nanny, the line of work as a nanny is very unique so whatever comes with is going to look different from what you are used to.

For me it shows lack of thoughtfulness and just a general detachment from what people (specially Nannie’s) face. It just seems like a slap in the face and comes off as though you posted just to bit feel as bad? Trust me highly recommended Nannie’s don’t work just so that they can get cash bonuses they work sincerely contribute their best families everyday in case this maybe a reason to conclude that nannies feel entitled to bonuses. It’s one thing if you have no penny to pay or give to anyone and ofcourse things happen even when people are financially blessed in life. The thing is more goes into hiring a domestic worker of any kind than just paying them for the work they do….for those who want to maintain a good relationship with their employees, they realize that it’s about human connection and that it’s important to build past just “well she’s my nanny and she was supposed to work for me and get paid for the work she does” especially if you are the one letting the worker go.

But I can tell you one thing, nearly all of my previous families including some temporary families, gifted me a cash bonus outside severance pay and I did not ask for it. They just appreciated me and the work I poured and it didn’t matter to me the amount, what mattered is that whatever they gave matched what they could afford and I could tell it was sincere. I still communicate with those families and one thing is for sure, even after years, we know we can count on each other. It’s not because they gave me money but that I could tell that they truly appreciated me and I did them….when you experience that, you only feel inclined to be there for the people who could decipher your needs without you demanding anything.

Showing is more powerful than telling. And someone can tell how much they are appreciated based on your decisions made regarding them.

I hope that you can take this feedback to consider for your next nanny and if it isn’t relevant to you I hope that it helps out any other parents navigating this phase of having a nanny. Peace and blessings,

[Anonymous]

The standard is a weeks pay per how many years as a parting give. The person above is insane to say , no just a thank you

[Anonymous]

Are you serious?! Donuts after 3 years. What a slap in the face

[Anonymous]

WOW I feel sorry for your nanny. Doughnuts don’t pay bills

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:WOW I feel sorry for your nanny. Doughnuts don’t pay bills

OP here I appreciate all feed back. We did give her some pastries and donuts from her favorite place like I mentioned before, bought her lunch on her last day and on top of her pay, she had one week vacation time left so we paid her that. She was grateful as she always is so I don't think we did too bad. Plus she's still a part of our family and welcomed over any time.

[Anonymous]

Sounds silly to me, I would not want any doughnuts, who eats doughnuts anyway. Her vacation is not a bonus, you owed her that. If she is a "family", you give her a cash bonus!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:WOW I feel sorry for your nanny. Doughnuts don’t pay bills

OP here I appreciate all feed back. We did give her some pastries and donuts from her favorite place like I mentioned before, bought her lunch on her last day and on top of her pay, she had one week vacation time left so we paid her that. She was grateful as she always is so I don't think we did too bad. Plus she's still a part of our family and welcomed over any time.

OP my last family who I was supposed to be like family too shorted me as well when my position ended. They gave me an empty card expressing their thanks and a pic of the kid and some flowers. Guess what when they call because they’re in a jam or just want a babysitter to go out guess who’s not available to help.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You don’t need to give severance if she had notice of her end date.
After 3 years though a parting monetary gift would be nice and appreciated.

She took care of your most precious possession for three years and you're asking if you should show appreciation with a monetary gift? Are you brain dead or just cheap? Give her nothing and confirm that you only thought of her as your less than human babysitter.