Aupair

[Anonymous]

Dear Parents,

We just got an Aupair from Mexico. We ended up going for an Aupair after seeing some of the the crazy salary demands and after spending thousands of dollars per month on childcare. I can't recommend them enough, and at 200.00 per week its an amazing savings. Truthfully, we pay her almost double that just because she is so wonderful!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Dear Parents,

We just got an Aupair from Mexico. We ended up going for an Aupair after seeing some of the the crazy salary demands and after spending thousands of dollars per month on childcare. I can't recommend them enough, and at 200.00 per week its an amazing savings. Truthfully, we pay her almost double that just because she is so wonderful!

Your aupair doesn’t have to worry about paying rent, utility bills, cell phone, groceries, so yes, her rate would be cheaper than a nanny.

[Anonymous]

We had several wonderful au pairs over the years. We are still in touch with them. The au pair program is a wonderful experience. Thanks for sharing.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We had several wonderful au pairs over the years. We are still in touch with them. The au pair program is a wonderful experience. Thanks for sharing.

Wasn’t they’re leaving hard on your kids? I can’t imagine how my child would react to his nanny leaving much less have several over his lifetime. I think it would make him have trust and bonding issues later in life.

I’m sure you’ll tell me that your kids are fine and in Ivy League schools, but I wonder if any studies have been done on it. It’s not like teachers in daycare because this person is in your home and part of your family for a year. And then she’s replaced. And then she’s replaced...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We had several wonderful au pairs over the years. We are still in touch with them. The au pair program is a wonderful experience. Thanks for sharing.

Wasn’t they’re leaving hard on your kids? I can’t imagine how my child would react to his nanny leaving much less have several over his lifetime. I think it would make him have trust and bonding issues later in life.

I’m sure you’ll tell me that your kids are fine and in Ivy League schools, but I wonder if any studies have been done on it. It’s not like teachers in daycare because this person is in your home and part of your family for a year. And then she’s replaced. And then she’s replaced...

Not the OP, but Aupairs are replaced every year? I didn’t know this.

[Anonymous]

Every year or two it they choose to extend their stay.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We had several wonderful au pairs over the years. We are still in touch with them. The au pair program is a wonderful experience. Thanks for sharing.

Wasn’t they’re leaving hard on your kids? I can’t imagine how my child would react to his nanny leaving much less have several over his lifetime. I think it would make him have trust and bonding issues later in life.

I’m sure you’ll tell me that your kids are fine and in Ivy League schools, but I wonder if any studies have been done on it. It’s not like teachers in daycare because this person is in your home and part of your family for a year. And then she’s replaced. And then she’s replaced...

Not the OP, but Aupairs are replaced every year? I didn’t know this.

Yes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We had several wonderful au pairs over the years. We are still in touch with them. The au pair program is a wonderful experience. Thanks for sharing.

Wasn’t they’re leaving hard on your kids? I can’t imagine how my child would react to his nanny leaving much less have several over his lifetime. I think it would make him have trust and bonding issues later in life.

I’m sure you’ll tell me that your kids are fine and in Ivy League schools, but I wonder if any studies have been done on it. It’s not like teachers in daycare because this person is in your home and part of your family for a year. And then she’s replaced. And then she’s replaced...

Not the OP, but Aupairs are replaced every year? I didn’t know this.

If they even make it to a year. Normally, the maximum number is 2 years, but some were longer due to covid.

[Anonymous]

Our kids were very close with our first au pair, but then she decided to rematch after 6 months. The kids took it in stride, partly because they knew they were getting another big sister.

[Anonymous]

Our AP has been here for two years. She will be a part of our lives forever (she's 26) - we will visit and she will visit, and we will likely retire in her home country as we have citizenship. Her leaving will be tough, but we will invest in staying in touch.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Dear Parents,

We just got an Aupair from Mexico. We ended up going for an Aupair after seeing some of the the crazy salary demands and after spending thousands of dollars per month on childcare. I can't recommend them enough, and at 200.00 per week its an amazing savings. Truthfully, we pay her almost double that just because she is so wonderful!

So glad you hare having a good experience.

Just clarifying that an AP is not $200 week. See other threads. About 25k plus a year after agency fee, school, phone, food, etc.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Dear Parents,

We just got an Aupair from Mexico. We ended up going for an Aupair after seeing some of the the crazy salary demands and after spending thousands of dollars per month on childcare. I can't recommend them enough, and at 200.00 per week its an amazing savings. Truthfully, we pay her almost double that just because she is so wonderful!

So glad you hare having a good experience.

Just clarifying that an AP is not $200 week. See other threads. About 25k plus a year after agency fee, school, phone, food, etc.

For us it is upwards of 35k, so it depends on the family.

[Anonymous]

More like 30k a year for us but yeah, sure, $200 a week

yes, aupairs stay 1-2 years which is great. With my oldest who went to Goddard School, the turnover for childcare providers was high and they changed rooms every year anyway. An aupair was more continuity.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We had several wonderful au pairs over the years. We are still in touch with them. The au pair program is a wonderful experience. Thanks for sharing.

Wasn’t they’re leaving hard on your kids? I can’t imagine how my child would react to his nanny leaving much less have several over his lifetime. I think it would make him have trust and bonding issues later in life.

I’m sure you’ll tell me that your kids are fine and in Ivy League schools, but I wonder if any studies have been done on it. It’s not like teachers in daycare because this person is in your home and part of your family for a year. And then she’s replaced. And then she’s replaced...

This is something I worried about initially, but I explained to DC that our AP was here to care for DC, but to also learn about a different culture and has parents of their own who miss them. That seemed to reasonate with DC, and hasn’t been much of an issue since.

[Anonymous]

It’s never been an issue for my kids. We’ve had 5 au pairs and they’ve loved them all, but they’re excited to get a new one and we keep in touch with the old ones. We’ve visited with several after their year with us. Kids are pretty used to people being in their lives for a finite amount of time - babysitters, teachers, friends, etc. Change doesn’t make them have trust or bonding issues. In fact, getting to know new people and adapting to different personalities and cultural differences is important for kids to learn as well.
No, my kids are not (yet) in college but they’re lovely, affectionate and kind kids who are always complimented on their behavior by adults and make friends easily and also have a curiosity and interest in other cultures/cuisines/backgrounds, some of which I believe comes from having au pairs since they were small. We didn’t get an au pair until our eldest was 6 and we moved to a larger house. They had a nanny before that who moved on from us to go to grad school but we still see her occasionally as she lives in the same city, and my kids didn’t have any lasting issues from her being with them for 4.5 years and then leaving. It’s a normal part of life! My oldest is now 12 and is usually described as the sweetest kid by other adults, she’s super affectionate and friendly, helpful and polite to a fault. She can also make an impressive tiramisu, flan and perfectly round roti to accompany curry - all skills she’s learned from our last 3 au pairs. She regularly texts and FaceTimes with the ones who have left, as do my younger kids (for whom electronic communication was a pretty foreign concept until covid).
We’ve been fortunate to have hosted each of our au pairs for a full year - I screen very carefully and do all I can to ensure a good match - so we haven’t had the issue of someone wanting a rematch. We are also a pretty generous and welcoming (and easygoing!) family.