How long do I have to wait till it is acceptable to quit?
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Anonymous
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Using you guys as soundboards. I am having a really tough time since back to work after corona. They paid me for 8 weeks during corona where they didn’t want me to come in. I get paid by the hour, no salary, during Corona they paid me 34 hours a week consistently. I guess that was my average hour back then.
When I got back about 5 weeks ago I felt so bad about them paying me for all that time (still do) that I told them i would never tel them if I work more than 34 hours they’ve been paying me but would tell them if I worked less so that they wouldn't overpay me. Since then I am working close to 40 hours and I’m not complaining cause obviously I feel like I owe them but I am trully at my witts end with the nonsense I have been doing. This was always also a personal assistant/do whatever kinda position but they are taking to another level. Like blow pollen outside using the leaf blower. Powerwash the front doors garage doors etc. Last week I removed a door because she wanted a chair out of one of the kid’s rooms and the chair wouldnt fit. I am a doer so I do everything that needs done like a good door mat but that is what they love mostly about me. The kicker is that only one kid - A TEENAGER!- and BOTH parents are in the house. She doesn't work and he works from home some days. My point is that I am not needed 5 days a week and suggested to them to reduce my hours for the summer obviously taking a pay cut so that I would come in only when needed. This suggestion was not met well specially from her and she keeps throwing on my face that I already had a lot of time off due to corona. I dont want to be an asshole and say it was a very stressful time where I couldnt go anywhere so not exactly “good time off” and for the summer would be time off UNPAID because I really hate to come in so that she can be filling my time with more shit that I dont want to do (but will because I know I owe them). The reason I’m feeling like this RIGHT NOW is because she just snapped at me out of nowhere and really hurt my feelings because it was a lot! To make matters worse I have an hour commute that has been getting increasingly difficult post corona they are making so many changes on the highway etc it is taking me more time to get to work and quite frankly it is not even worth it but I now feel like I owe them to stay because of so many hours they paid me trhu covid. I’ve worked for them for 5+ years. How long do you think I should guilt myself into staying! Tia |
Anonymous
| Quit now. They are entitled, which means they will be pissed at you for quitting whether you do it tomorrow or a year from now. Life is too short and there are lots of nanny jobs open right now. |
Anonymous
| Why do they need a nanny for a teenager? What exactly are your duties vis a vis a teenager, especially right now with fewer activities to drive to. I do think you owe them at least one week for every week you got paid for staying home, but you should have been looking for a job with younger children if you are a nanny. |
Anonymous
They have a younger child who is currently away in a sleep-away camp (yep, dont ask but they could find a camp for the 10yo - I thought everything was cancelled but apparently they are doing smaller camps/ less kids/ with more protocols for covid). I do a lot of driving related to the kids, scheduling, organizing all the logistic for their activities (who goes where what time, pick ups drop offs etc), I do appointments (dentists, orthos, physical therapy etc), Groceries for the whole house, Lately even dinner for the whole house (it started as “oh can you prep so so for me please” and then all of the sudden I cant leave till table is set, rice is ready, sides are ready and main meal at least well under way)... I cover all games and tournaments (various sports).. in a more day to day like school season I pick them up from school, make sure they have all the resources they need, help some with homework, plan and make snacks, meals, clean up after their meals etc... I also do some personal assistant related for the mom as in organizing files and various projects for her....honestly I do whatever is needed done if the floor is dirty I vaccumm if the garbage is full I take it out, I prep their coffee maker every night, sometimes bathe the dog when she rolls on dirt I mean I can go on and on and on I agree with your 1 week per paid week suggestion, slso you mean I should work at least 2 months before I quit I think thats fair. I also plan on giving them a good notice time, like another 8 weeks... |
Anonymous
| You aren’t working as a nanny, OP, which is fine but nanny rules don’t apply (they aren’t going to be scrambling for childcare, you haven’t a bond with the children). I think you can give your notice anytime. |
Anonymous
| You don't owe them anything. They paid you during COVID to keep you from seeking another job. Give the required notice and quit. |
Anonymous
| Man, OP, that is nuts! You should go on salary as a house manager and demand a much higher salary than a nanny makes. |
Anonymous
| You don't owe them anything. Quit. You deserve to be happy. |
Anonymous
| Maybe I’m an outlier here... but how terrible can these people be??? They paid you for 8 weeks while you didn’t work. They care about your safety and well-being. And yeah, they asked you to move a door, but so what? They paid you for 8 weeks! |
Anonymous
Are you a nanny? I ask because most nannies I know have had at least one family that will take and take and take and the door is just a drop in the bucket. It’s an example of the kind of thing they are asking: wildly unrelated to child care. She is a personal assistant, but with more duties and less pay. |
Anonymous
My post specifies why I’m unhappy. I never said they were terrible. But I want to quit and my question was how long is it acceptable to wait considering they did pay me during corona. I didn't “move” a door. I removed hinges and the door then I re-installed the door. I dont know who you are but have you done that alone? I should have gotten a medal that day but I would have been happy with a thank you and some amazement, instead it looked like it was another Tuesday chore. Also your message lacks conclusion on advice, no offense but I dont really know what is the goal of your input. I can only infer that you think because they paid me = they are amazing = I should stay ? |
Anonymous
| Thanks guys for all the replies. |
Anonymous
| Give appropriate notice and quit. |
Anonymous
| I would give 2 weeks notice. |
Anonymous
| Give 2-4wks if you can |