Why do people slander AP's on some forum's?

[Anonymous]

I'm a member of a facebook Host mom group and once in while someone will post 'is this your AP' and share some defamatory story about them shopping around, etc.

Today, someone posted saying 'do you know so and so from ...' and mentioned this was a delayed story by several months.
They wrote that the AP was a 'straight up disaster' and that she had reportedly keyed the moms car and taken a phone.

The person posted this under the guise of wanting to find the host family but my question is - why? If she keyed the mom's car I'm guessing the HM is very aware of the issues.

This HM also shared the girls facebook.

Since all of this is heresay and based on second hand knowledge I'm curious why someone would post this?

Is it to help future HM's avoid her?

[Anonymous]

HA! I’m in the same group and sort of wondered “what is the point!?” The incidents apparently happened last September (or at least that’s the impression I got) so i’m assuming the AP will be on her way home shortly? Or maybe she was posting so that someone avoided an extension? I really couldn’t tell.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:HA! I’m in the same group and sort of wondered “what is the point!?” The incidents apparently happened last September (or at least that’s the impression I got) so i’m assuming the AP will be on her way home shortly? Or maybe she was posting so that someone avoided an extension? I really couldn’t tell.

Right?! It just felt a but weird and vindictive and I couldn't understand what the end goal was? I've seen it a few times and don't like what seems to be an 'us' vs. 'them' mentality. They are caring for our children after all!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:HA! I’m in the same group and sort of wondered “what is the point!?” The incidents apparently happened last September (or at least that’s the impression I got) so i’m assuming the AP will be on her way home shortly? Or maybe she was posting so that someone avoided an extension? I really couldn’t tell.

Right?! It just felt a but weird and vindictive and I couldn't understand what the end goal was? I've seen it a few times and don't like what seems to be an 'us' vs. 'them' mentality. They are caring for our children after all!

Definitely. I’ve been primarily a lurker in that group because I really don’t seem to fall on either end of the spectrum like other posters. We have our first au pair, she’s perfectly fine, not a “unicorn” by any means but she keeps my kids safe and happy so we’re happy to have her as a part of our family for the year.

[Anonymous]

The waiting a few months thing is weird. That she posted a conversation from a friend who "knew" about this AP (not sure what the friend's connection to the AP--someone in her own AP's cluster?) also seemed kind of odd.

The original HM should have been the one trying to find the new HM within the rematch period. Or taken it up with the agency to get her sent home, but we all know the complaints about CCAP hiding such stories.

Maybe she's bored and stirring up some drama with a "You're not going to believe this story, but I'll post some proof about it through these screenshots"?

[Anonymous]

Isn't it obvious? The AP is still in the country as an AP. Stories like this help inform parents of potential people to avoid should they end up in rematch or extension.

I would want to know if that was MY AP.

[Anonymous]

Is there a trick to getting into that Facebook group? I assume this is the one where my join request has been pending for some time. It is not obvious from my social media profile that I have children, but prefer to keep that private.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Is there a trick to getting into that Facebook group? I assume this is the one where my join request has been pending for some time. It is not obvious from my social media profile that I have children, but prefer to keep that private.

The better Facebook groups screen heavily. They want to be sure you are a host parent and not an AP or LCC. To get in you’ll need to message an admin. They will require you to send them a copy of your host family receipt and or require you to be their Facebook friend so they can look over your profile. I had to do this, I also have my profile heavily locked down.

[Anonymous]

I used to participate in those groups but in retrospect I think they tend to produce more drama than helpful knowledge.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Is there a trick to getting into that Facebook group? I assume this is the one where my join request has been pending for some time. It is not obvious from my social media profile that I have children, but prefer to keep that private.

The better Facebook groups screen heavily. They want to be sure you are a host parent and not an AP or LCC. To get in you’ll need to message an admin. They will require you to send them a copy of your host family receipt and or require you to be their Facebook friend so they can look over your profile. I had to do this, I also have my profile heavily locked down.

Which group is this?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Is there a trick to getting into that Facebook group? I assume this is the one where my join request has been pending for some time. It is not obvious from my social media profile that I have children, but prefer to keep that private.

The better Facebook groups screen heavily. They want to be sure you are a host parent and not an AP or LCC. To get in you’ll need to message an admin. They will require you to send them a copy of your host family receipt and or require you to be their Facebook friend so they can look over your profile. I had to do this, I also have my profile heavily locked down.

Which group is this?

the name is:

au pair host families only

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Is there a trick to getting into that Facebook group? I assume this is the one where my join request has been pending for some time. It is not obvious from my social media profile that I have children, but prefer to keep that private.

The better Facebook groups screen heavily. They want to be sure you are a host parent and not an AP or LCC. To get in you’ll need to message an admin. They will require you to send them a copy of your host family receipt and or require you to be their Facebook friend so they can look over your profile. I had to do this, I also have my profile heavily locked down.

Which group is this?

the name is:

au pair host families only

I requested to join that group a while back and my request is still pending. Any ideas for how to get it to go through?

[Anonymous]

That group is super weird. There seem to be a few HFs on there that really hate the program and want everyone else to hate it too. Why not just stop participating?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Isn't it obvious? The AP is still in the country as an AP. Stories like this help inform parents of potential people to avoid should they end up in rematch or extension.

I would want to know if that was MY AP.

That particular story was a bit odd.

Other posts about "is this your AP who says she wants to go into rematch, but is waiting until after the holidays?" I would definitely want to know.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Isn't it obvious? The AP is still in the country as an AP. Stories like this help inform parents of potential people to avoid should they end up in rematch or extension.

I would want to know if that was MY AP.

That particular story was a bit odd.

Other posts about "is this your AP who says she wants to go into rematch, but is waiting until after the holidays?" I would definitely want to know.

How about the “your au pair is selling cookies to other au pairs” post? WTF was that about?