Should I be mad about this?

[Anonymous]

I got home yesterday, and nanny shows where the just-turned-2 year old got a pen and drew on the couch. Apparently, he got a chair into the playroom, climbed it to access the markers on the upper shelf, got them down, got a pen, and made it to the couch and drew on it, all without the nanny noticing.

Nanny says she was making lunch while this happened. We have an open kitchen where you can see the playroom, dining room and living room.

On the one hand, I know things like this happen. On the other, it seems like she really had to not be paying attention. Plus, our couch is pretty much ruined now so I'm bummed about that.

Assuming I do have a right to be upset, what's the best way to approach this with her?

Thoughts?

[Anonymous]

With urban open design, the nanny most likely was watching your child but didn’t realize what she was up to. Honestly, as a mother of three, I wouldn’t get that upset. This sort of thing is going to happen two hundred times before your kid leaves for college. Kids are why we can’t have nice things”.

[Anonymous]

What would being upset or bringing it up with her accomplish? The nanny knows you are upset.

These things happen. When the next one happens on your watch you’ll understand.

[Anonymous]

You should fire her, quit your job and you stay home and see how easy it is to never take your eyes off child.

[Anonymous]

You shouldn’t have markers or pens where an active toddler can get to. Rookie mistake.

I agree that your nanny was most likely watching but didn’t know what your child was up to. Let it go, OP. Shit happens.

[Anonymous]

Agreed with posters. My previous charge would always get a chair push it against the pantry and eat the candy and sweets he found. Then one morning it happened to MB when she was asleep. I agree that she was probably watching him but just didn’t know what he was doing.

[Anonymous]

A one year old did all that..

[Anonymous]

These things happen. I think it is reasonable for her to call around and figure out how to get it cleaned and make the arrangements for that (with you paying, her doing the leg work during nap time or whatever) just like any other child related task.

[Anonymous]

Are you a first time mom, OP?

You never should have pens or markers in the playroom. A toddler can figure out how to reach anything. This one is on you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Are you a first time mom, OP?

You never should have pens or markers in the playroom. A toddler can figure out how to reach anything. This one is on you.

Not OP but my first is so chill and my second is a wild one I learned things that I didn't even think possible kids could do.. each kid is different

[Anonymous]

So you think it never could have happened on your watch?

[Anonymous]

Let’s see... I know kids who ate soap, dog food, and poison at 2. I know kids who accidentally ruined couches, tables, chairs, jewelry, a refrigerator and many, many doors. I know kids who make mistakes and don’t realize because they’re too young. I know kids who do things on purpose out of anger when older, or who lie about accidents.

I also know plenty of parents who had the above happen while watching the kids above.

Unless it’s permanent marker, it will come out. Even if it’s permanent, you can make it lighter or use a pillow/throw to cover it up.

Repeat this as many times as needed: Accidents will happen. Kids will learn. Adults will learn. Accidents will still happen. My child is safe, and for now, the world is good.

[Anonymous]

I wouldn't get upset over something like that.
It happens and it will happen to you too OP. I am sure the nanny is feeling bad enough as it is without you adding to it.

[Anonymous]

Accidents happen. Even if you have the most cautious, careful kids...things will break. Things will get colored on. Things will get scratched and stained.

Can you be upset and disappointed that it happened? Absolutely. Was your nanny apologetic? I've accidentally broken things in a family's home before and I always feel terrible, but accidents happen.

It does sound like she was distracted, but she's human. Unless this becomes a regular occurrence, I'd let it go.

[Anonymous]

To the poster who seems surprised that "a one year old did that": Never trust a small child, no matter the age.