"formal" home: how you would feel about it?

[Anonymous]

Hello and happy New Year to all!

So, I have been interviewing for jobs recently because some lifestyle changes will mean my NF can no longer keep me on full time, which I need. I recently interviewed for a position that seems tempting. It pays really well, provides great benefits, the kids seem great, and the family seems good. The only issue is that it's a somewhat...different environment than I'm used to working in. It's a very wealthy family who have other staff working in the home including housekeepers and a chef. And, here's the thing: they require all staff, including me if I take the job, to wear uniforms and the other staff refer to DB and MB as Mr. and Mrs. So and So. They refer to it as a "formal home." This all seems very strange and alien to me, but again, it does pay very well. Is this a deal breaker or too weird or would you consider it?

[Anonymous]

It would be a deal-breaker for me. I have always called parents by their first names and worn my own clothes to work.

[Anonymous]

Aside from a uniform and Mr. & Mrs. anything else? It does not sound terrible.

[Anonymous]

I wouldn’t want to work in that environment but I don’t think it sounds terrible just different from what I’m used to. It could be a great career move for you.

[Anonymous]

Definitely say no to the uniform. In the wealthiest homes, the nanny never wears anything but her own clothes.

Mr & Mrs are no big deal.

Working as a nanny with a household staff is so great! Not only do I not have to cook for the children, the chef makes amazing lunches for me and the other staff. I do the baby’s laundry upstairs by her nursery but the nannies for the other kids don’t do laundry at all. We all get full healthcare and dental and start at three weeks vacation. The perks are pretty amazing with a very rich family.

[Anonymous]

They sound like insufferable snobs and you will be "the help.". I would pass.

[Anonymous]

I did a job like that for 3 years. It was dehumanizing.

[Anonymous]

Is it literally a uniform or just a dress code? I would be ok with a dress code but not a uniform.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:They sound like insufferable snobs and you will be "the help.". I would pass.

My exact thoughts! Totally agree.

[Anonymous]

I think a uniform has it's pros because my personal clothes won't be ruined and I don't have to think about what I am wearing day to day.

[Anonymous]

A uniform is a deal-breaker for this many people? I miss my old school uniforms so badly. 5 minutes out the door, and no worries about repeating clothes, buying new clothes, work appropriateness...

But, then, I do think of myself as an employee, and not a member of the family or an independent service provider with clients. I'm in it for the money and benefits.

[Anonymous]

Honestly, uniforms aren't that bad. I wore one when I worked in a staffed home a few years ago. Once you get over your initial aversion to the idea of wearing one the reality isn't actually that bad for the reasons people mentioned above. The same goes for the Mr. and Mrs. thing. Once you get over your aversion to the symbolism of it, it's fine. I actually still miss that job and would still be doing it if my husband and I hadn't moved to pursue a career opportunity for him.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Honestly, uniforms aren't that bad. I wore one when I worked in a staffed home a few years ago. Once you get over your initial aversion to the idea of wearing one the reality isn't actually that bad for the reasons people mentioned above. The same goes for the Mr. and Mrs. thing. Once you get over your aversion to the symbolism of it, it's fine. I actually still miss that job and would still be doing it if my husband and I hadn't moved to pursue a career opportunity for him.

What did the uniform look like ?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Honestly, uniforms aren't that bad. I wore one when I worked in a staffed home a few years ago. Once you get over your initial aversion to the idea of wearing one the reality isn't actually that bad for the reasons people mentioned above. The same goes for the Mr. and Mrs. thing. Once you get over your aversion to the symbolism of it, it's fine. I actually still miss that job and would still be doing it if my husband and I hadn't moved to pursue a career opportunity for him.

What did the uniform look like ?

White collared shirt and black pants or skirt.

[Anonymous]

I would take the job.

Yes, as one PP brought up - you likely will be looked at as the “help,” or maybe not.

Regardless if the pay/benefits are really good, then I could let that one slide.
Also calling the parents Mr. + Mrs. I could certainly live with.

At least give the job a fair chance.
This might be the one.

Good luck OP!