Au pair just asked to rematch

[Anonymous]

She says our 5 year old DS has been mean to her. I suspect she wants to be in another city. Never been through a rematch. Any advice on getting through this and finding the next au pair in two weeks?

[Anonymous]

Get busy!

[Anonymous]

With the holidays around the corner, it’s a tough time for both parties to rematch. Your LCC can be a great help by recommending rematch candidates as they come up in the system (the good ones will be snatched in a blink of an eye). There are Facebook rematch groups, which might be helpful.

[Anonymous]

It can be because she wants another city (you can't blame her - expectactions vs reality) or because your child is really tough to manage. And if that's the case it's not too late to teach him to behave.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It can be because she wants another city (you can't blame her - expectactions vs reality) or because your child is really tough to manage. And if that's the case it's not too late to teach him to behave.

We regularly “teach him to behave,” but like any five year old, he has his tough days. I think it’s a combination of her wanting to live in her first choice city and not knowing how to deal with my child and what is developmentally normal for a five year old

[Anonymous]

Don’t fixate on why she wants to rematch. Caring for a 5 yr old can be freaking tough if you’re not a parent. Just worry about finding your best match. Get in some FB groups. Good luck.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Don’t fixate on why she wants to rematch. Caring for a 5 yr old can be freaking tough if you’re not a parent. Just worry about finding your best match. Get in some FB groups. Good luck.

This. It really does not matter. Take a deep breath and focus on the next phase. Good luck!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It can be because she wants another city (you can't blame her - expectactions vs reality) or because your child is really tough to manage. And if that's the case it's not too late to teach him to behave.

We regularly “teach him to behave,” but like any five year old, he has his tough days. I think it’s a combination of her wanting to live in her first choice city and not knowing how to deal with my child and what is developmentally normal for a five year old

I have a tough child who has tested each AuPair to the outer limits. I'm amazed none have quit. He even went through a hitting phase. It was hell for everyone. Luckily he ended up learning how to behave. We did find out there German and Austrian APs were best for him. Though they are not the warmest he responds best to someone who can be strict and stick to their guns. We found the German culture is suited for this.

You really cant blame her if he is constantly trying to have a power struggle.

[Anonymous]

Will be interesting to see if she finds a rematch family this time of year. Probably will.

She takes care of one child and it was too much?

I would be honest about that if the next family calls.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Will be interesting to see if she finds a rematch family this time of year. Probably will.

She takes care of one child and it was too much?

I would be honest about that if the next family calls.

How do you know it is only one kid?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This. It really does not matter. Take a deep breath and focus on the next phase. Good luck!

I think it does matter.
If AP rematches because she has problems handling the child or because the child/children she is caring for is/are acting up OP might be heading for more rematches if they don't work on the underlying problem. If AP is rematching only because she is unhappy with where she is it might indeed not matter (other than making sure that the new AP to come doesn't mind where she goes to).

[Anonymous]

OP here - our LCC spoke to her and AP told her she wants to rematch to try to move to her first choice city and that she’s not happy in our area. According to the LCC, she didn’t even bring up my son’s behavior until the LCC asked her about it but she admitted that it’s about the location.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here - our LCC spoke to her and AP told her she wants to rematch to try to move to her first choice city and that she’s not happy in our area. According to the LCC, she didn’t even bring up my son’s behavior until the LCC asked her about it but she admitted that it’s about the location.

I am sorry, OP. Hope you find a great rematch AP quickly.

[Anonymous]

Line up backup childcare now. Rematch sucks and usually takes much longer than you want it to.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here - our LCC spoke to her and AP told her she wants to rematch to try to move to her first choice city and that she’s not happy in our area. According to the LCC, she didn’t even bring up my son’s behavior until the LCC asked her about it but she admitted that it’s about the location.

May I ask which was her first choice city and where are you? DMV?