I dodged a bullet

[Anonymous]

I had been on the job search for about 6 weeks and have been interviewing with several families. I had gotten pretty far with three families and was going over a contract with one family. I had not officially accepted but we were all moving forward. In the end, I ended up declining the position because the family refused to understand how guaranteed hours worked and wanted to bank hours. Lots of, “If we aren’t using you, why do we need to pay you?”

I quickly declined and wished them the best of luck on their search. The mother never responded to my texts, calls or emails. Never.

I ended up accepting my second choice position (same pay, just later start date and slightly further commute).

Then I receive a call from my nanny agency saying the family was furious because I “didn’t show up for my start date.”

Nope. We didn’t have a start date. I never accepted the position, I don’t accept positions until all is agreed upon in the contract. I emailed you, called you, texted you and never got a response. Aside from showing up at your house, what could I do.

Thankfully I’ve been with my agency for awhile and they understood and tried to contact the family and explain that I’m not obligated to start just because the position was offered to me. Thank you, agency, for having my back.

All was well, until a nanny friend of mine told me the mother was slandering my name in some local Facebook child care Facebook group. Same spiel, I didn’t show up to my start date. I ended up responding to her claims and basically said what I mentioned above. We didn’t have a start date because I never accepted the position. I declined the terms of the contract and said it wouldn’t work out, best of luck etc and you stopped responding to all my attempts at getting ahold of you.

She then messaged me through Facebook messenger (yes, she’s blocked now) and tells me I have a bloated ego and that I’m “an entitled babysitter”. That is she takes the time and puts forth effort to interview someone, that they shouldn’t seek employment anywhere else and that I basically had to accept the position because I’m the only one she offered it to and it was a “total waste” of her time to try to hire me and she doesn’t like her time wasted. She also told me I’d never find a family who’d agree to guaranteed hours (really, because I’ve done this for 17 years and every family I’ve worked for agreed to guaranteed hours, including the one I work for now). Ends with how she will make sure I can’t waste anyone else’s time and that she’ll make sure I don’t work in this area again because she’s “very influential”.

Ok, crazy. So clearly I dodged a bullet, but I had met her numerous times and never guessed she could get this way.

But families, a nanny can decline your offer at any time. A nanny can search for other positions while interviewing for you. You are interviewing other candidates, no? A nanny also wants to find the best fit for her. It ends up working out much better if everyone is happy.

I know most families aren’t like this, definitely the craziest thing I’ve experienced. [i]

[Anonymous]

Wow. You did dodge a bullet. Congrats on your new position! Just wondering, what hours didn’t they want to pay you?

[Anonymous]

Good heavens - that's a whole new level of crazy.

Glad you dodged it OP.

-MB

[Anonymous]

I would investigation in having a lawyer write her a letter about slandering you on social media. And demand a retraction. Even if she has not damaged your reputation she has done her best to do so! Crap like this stays forever and who knows what damage it could cause you down the road

[Anonymous]

WOW. I would say you dodged a nuke. I'd me tempted to post screen shots of that conversation in the thread where she slanders you. Tempted.

[Anonymous]

Omg that mom is crazy! Shes a stalker with no life. I feel bad for her children, shes crazy!
OP you did great, I'm glad you are away and chose a better family! Hugs!

[Anonymous]

That woman is insane! Yes, you dodged a bullet -

[Anonymous]

Good for you OP!! Is better to stay away from crazy parents.

[Anonymous]

I cannot believe ppl are that crazy and have that much time on their hands smh. Karma will come for her just as crazy. Sorry for the poor nanny who gets stuck with that job.

[Anonymous]

I have a horrible review on care because I dared to ask a family any questions. It happens, and any family who looks at the review and realizes I never worked for the family doesn’t have an issue.

[Anonymous]

That is ridiculous. What area is this in?

[Anonymous]

I didn't get it. Did you sing the contract or no? Did you sign it and then say that you don't agree with certain points? Did you sing it and the e-mailed them to say no. What made them thing you would show up on start date? I'm not saying you should show up after signing it and then telling them no. I just couldn't find the place where you say you signed it or not. Don't want to read again- too long. I'm trying to understand what made her so mad.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I didn't get it. Did you sing the contract or no? Did you sign it and then say that you don't agree with certain points? Did you sing it and the e-mailed them to say no. What made them thing you would show up on start date? I'm not saying you should show up after signing it and then telling them no. I just couldn't find the place where you say you signed it or not. Don't want to read again- too long. I'm trying to understand what made her so mad.

The parents didnt want to pay her OT. And then mom acted like a crazy freak stalker with no life. The real issue here is that those poor kids will suffer living with that kind of mother.

[Anonymous]

Glad to hear good stories like this! That mom is a crazy lunatic!