3 child, 2 family nanny share - Increase in Nanny Pay

[Anonymous]

I have a new little one I will be adding to our perfectly happy 2 child 2 family nanny share this fall. Our nanny has worked for both families for over 2 years and we have had very few, if any issues with the nanny and the share. We are in a great situation and want to keep all parties happy, especially the children. The nanny is willing and excited to take this on, especially since my oldest will be going to school in the spring so this 3 child share will be about 6 months long (before it goes back to being 2 with the new baby and the other family's younger child). That means she will have the two toddlers and an infant for a stretch when the infant is most interested in eating, napping and stationary playing (and we are totally comfortable having her take him along on the usual outings in the meantime).

We host full time. We currently use the same hours and split the rate evenly. When we go to three children, what do people do as far as increase in nanny's rate? I have read everywhere from $2-$5 additional an hour. Is that only for the hours that the nanny is working with three children? Or across the board?

Also, I have read some families have the 1 child family reduce their pay slightly while the two child family takes on additional pay whenever all three children are present. I have also read that some people keep the 1 child family at the same rate and the 2 child family pays the entire increase and that's all. I have also read about splitting three ways, which makes sense theoretically but in practice would mean in our case, we would be paying more for our share than we would be than if we hired our own personal nanny.

It sounds like there are a lot of ways this can be done and I am open to hearing advice about what has worked and what hasn't. TIA.

[Anonymous]

So hold on. The departing toddler is the sibling of the baby?

Will the continued toddler and infant be siblings or will it be a share with a baby and toddler going forward?

It makes a difference because a) going forward a share with kids 2yrs apart is tough and nanny may want to be compensated on the higher end for that, or she may charge more for the infant than the toddler even once it reverts to a 2-child share, and b) are you hoping to use nanny share as backup if older sibling is home for a teacher work day or other bogus school break? Because you should plan for that rate now as well.

[Anonymous]

I can't imagine any situation where you are not the only one paying for the rate increase. It makes no sense that the other family would split anything with your or incur any additional cost for your second child. You can do two things reasonably

1. Increase her rate by 1-4 dollars an hour. This will compensate her for the 6 months that there are three kids, and you keep that rate after your oldest goes to school. This allows you the most flexibility to have all three when school is closed, there is a cool activity you want kid to go to so skip preschool, not fevery but not well enough to go to school, third day of a snow day where school is closed but roads are fine. You pick up the entire rate difference, and you have a fixed weekly cost. But, you know you have coverage when you need all three kids watched.

2. You establish a 2 kid and a 3 kid rate. You probably need to increase by a dollar anyway, but you have your two kid rate for once older one goes to school and three kid rate for this time period. Then, you pay nanny different amounts based on kids. You save money in the long run, but you have more tracking and managing to do. Nanny gets a base pay increase and then an additional increase for the extra kid.

3. This is sometimes where shares break down. You might find yourself close to what you would pay for a nanny for just your family, and you have to deal with another family, another schedule, and another child.

[Anonymous]

This is OP - Perhaps I worded that wrong, I realize we would incur the entire cost of the increase, I just wasn't sure what the increase should be and how much the second families portion should decrease. Is there a set percentage people use? Is it all just case by case. I agree it gets complicated fast.

To the PP, unclear why would I pay a full $5 more an hour when we go back to two children. That seems unimaginable to do across the board and unaffordable in the long-term. I love our nanny dearly but I think even she would agree that doesn't make a lot of sense.

[Anonymous]

Hi OP,

Not sure why everyone was so confused by your post. Yes, you need to pay for three children, as there will often be three children (after school, possibly before, school holidays, teacher days, and SUMMERS). Don't break up the pay when she has 2 and when she has 3, that is complicated and doesn't give her a proper budget. Plus, given that the share is at your house, she will likely be tending to laundry of both your children.

I think a $4 raise is sufficient, $3 coming from you and $1 coming the other family when the annual raise approaches.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Hi OP,

Not sure why everyone was so confused by your post. Yes, you need to pay for three children, as there will often be three children (after school, possibly before, school holidays, teacher days, and SUMMERS). Don't break up the pay when she has 2 and when she has 3, that is complicated and doesn't give her a proper budget. Plus, given that the share is at your house, she will likely be tending to laundry of both your children.

I think a $4 raise is sufficient, $3 coming from you and $1 coming the other family when the annual raise approaches.

What? No way the other family takes a new kid into their share AND pays a fee increase, that's crazy.

[Anonymous]

If you were going to give her a cumulative raise of a dollar for the work anniversary, I'd bump it up to $2 and cover it yourself. That way the other family gets the benefit of not paying the extra 0.50/hr for the coming year, and you get the stability of the nanny you love and care for both kids.

$4 would be amazing, but feels like a LOT when you consider that most people seek out shares specifically because getting their own nanny is out of reach financially. If you can swing more, pay more, of course. But I think my suggestion is fair to you and the other family and the nanny.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If you were going to give her a cumulative raise of a dollar for the work anniversary, I'd bump it up to $2 and cover it yourself. That way the other family gets the benefit of not paying the extra 0.50/hr for the coming year, and you get the stability of the nanny you love and care for both kids.

$4 would be amazing, but feels like a LOT when you consider that most people seek out shares specifically because getting their own nanny is out of reach financially. If you can swing more, pay more, of course. But I think my suggestion is fair to you and the other family and the nanny.

This.

[Anonymous]

OP- Did you ever find a resolution? I'd be curious to know how you handled the change from 2 to 3 kids with the 2 nanny share families. We will be in a similar situation soon and need to determine our way forward. TIA!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This is OP - Perhaps I worded that wrong, I realize we would incur the entire cost of the increase, I just wasn't sure what the increase should be and how much the second families portion should decrease. Is there a set percentage people use? Is it all just case by case. I agree it gets complicated fast.

To the PP, unclear why would I pay a full $5 more an hour when we go back to two children. That seems unimaginable to do across the board and unaffordable in the long-term. I love our nanny dearly but I think even she would agree that doesn't make a lot of sense.

There will be days when school is closed, holidays when you work, summer vacations. You pay the extra all the time. This is grossly unfair to the nanny!

[Anonymous]

Your post isn’t confusing at all, but I do have a significant question. Will your nanny be responsible for after school, sick days, school “holidays”, summers, etc.? It is likely worth maintaining the increase to have her available for those needs. I haven’t done a share, but I think that $3-4 increase is sufficient and the other family maintains their current rate without an added annual increase.

[Anonymous]

I would increase by a few dollars but also lower the other families amount when nanny has all three kids. As a parent of one, I would not be ok with paying 1/2 when you have two kids and I have one.

[Anonymous]

I’m in the same situation and the family who has the new baby pays the increase and the other family’s pay stays the same, unless it’s raise time.

The increase amount can be tricky only because not every share pays the same amount. So, if you’re paying $20 per hour now and offer a $5 increase for the new baby, $25 doesn’t seem fair- that’s just my opinion.

My situation is different because both families pay a flat rate per week. So they will be paying $300 more for the new baby.

When your oldest goes to school, will nanny pick up and drop off? You should have 2 rates since there will be times your nanny has both of your children. So, 1 rate for 1 child and another rate for 2 children.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Hi OP,

Not sure why everyone was so confused by your post. Yes, you need to pay for three children, as there will often be three children (after school, possibly before, school holidays, teacher days, and SUMMERS). Don't break up the pay when she has 2 and when she has 3, that is complicated and doesn't give her a proper budget. Plus, given that the share is at your house, she will likely be tending to laundry of both your children.

I think a $4 raise is sufficient, $3 coming from you and $1 coming the other family when the annual raise approaches.

Op shouldn’t pay for 3 children, she should pay for having 2 children. The other family should be out the equation as their rate should not changed. What will Op pay for adding HER new baby to the share? The raise shouldn’t be included in adding a child. If the families agreed to a $1 raise (total) then each family pays $0.50 and OP would pay $.50+ increase for new baby.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would increase by a few dollars but also lower the other families amount when nanny has all three kids. As a parent of one, I would not be ok with paying 1/2 when you have two kids and I have one.

That’s not at all what was said. This post isn’t that confusing.