Torn... help

[Anonymous]

I have no clue what to do. I was seeking a full-time commitment because my current families only needed 30 hours and I need to work and bring home more income due to changes. I did not want to force them into a commitment that they don't need. I have given my family a 3 weeks notice but once I explained why I was leaving they stated how sad they are, how much they value me and would be willing to give me more hours. I have accepted a position but don't start for another 3 weeks, but the family has given notice to their children's daycare notice of them leaving. I don't know what to do. I love my current families (we have had a few bumps in the road) but this new family seems so nice and their children have already begun to cling to me (the parents even made me dinner).

The new family rate is a little lower but I have guaranteed OT, that will put me at bringing home the same amount. I have paid holidays, two weeks vacation (one week to be taken when they take theirs) and 5 paid sick days.

My current families (nanny share) offers two weeks paid vacation of my choosing and 5 sick days. I get holiday's off but they are not paid. I will have been with them a year coming up soon which I would ask about a raise in the near future. They have been extremely understanding of my financial issues and one family even offered for me to move in with them (which is making this decision so hard).

I don't know what to do!! It's bothering me as I will need to make a decision by Friday. With the family now, I am in a good area where I have access to everything (walking or metro). They are located in D.C. The new family is in V.A which I will be relocating there in the next month.

What would you do?

[Anonymous]

wow, tough call. I'm probably not going to be much help but really you need to sit down with a pencil and paper and do an old fashioned pro-con list. I'd want to know more about whether the one family seriously offered you to move in (and if so, what kind of accommodations and for how long are they willing to do it) or were they just spouting off in the moment, saying what you wanted to hear without really thinking it through?

How long would the families be able to handle the extra hours before resenting it and realizing they're paying for something they don't need?

How many days a week do you work for them and what hours? If it's 4 days a week, could you find a one day a week gig that would be pretty consistent? I've never had much trouble finding those.

How much is your moving cost...truck, time to do it and unpack/pack, move in costs etc? Would you be pissed that you moved for this family if things didn't work out afterall? Remember, they're pulling their kids from daycare so they haven't experienced the sticker shock of having a nanny yet.

Would the share families ever be able to trust you again since you're looking for more money? Would they always keep you at arms length and treat you as a temporary employee?

Would your overall quality of life improve if you moved? Do you have a place in mind that's affordable and close to things like work, groceries, mass transit etc or will you have to make some big lifestyle changes when you move?

How much more money per month will you be making and how much will the cost of your rent change? Will the rent be more or less per month than you currently pay?

Just some stuff to thing about...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:wow, tough call. I'm probably not going to be much help but really you need to sit down with a pencil and paper and do an old fashioned pro-con list. I'd want to know more about whether the one family seriously offered you to move in (and if so, what kind of accommodations and for how long are they willing to do it) or were they just spouting off in the moment, saying what you wanted to hear without really thinking it through?

How long would the families be able to handle the extra hours before resenting it and realizing they're paying for something they don't need?

How many days a week do you work for them and what hours? If it's 4 days a week, could you find a one day a week gig that would be pretty consistent? I've never had much trouble finding those.

How much is your moving cost...truck, time to do it and unpack/pack, move in costs etc? Would you be pissed that you moved for this family if things didn't work out afterall? Remember, they're pulling their kids from daycare so they haven't experienced the sticker shock of having a nanny yet.

Would the share families ever be able to trust you again since you're looking for more money? Would they always keep you at arms length and treat you as a temporary employee?

Would your overall quality of life improve if you moved? Do you have a place in mind that's affordable and close to things like work, groceries, mass transit etc or will you have to make some big lifestyle changes when you move?

How much more money per month will you be making and how much will the cost of your rent change? Will the rent be more or less per month than you currently pay?

Just some stuff to thing about...

Thank you for your time and input. You have made some valid points and so far are the 3rd person whom is said "make a pros and cons list."

First, the family that has offered their home to me was being really sincere, at least I think, and she has brought it up twice and I have declined. I wouldn't dare impose and its not like they have a home big enough for 3 adults, 1 toddler and a dog. Plus, I am in a rent agreement for another month.

The job now, is 3 days per week and they are willing to up to 4 days per week (40 hours per week, 7:30-5:30). Both families (the moms) are in the medical field, so their schedule/days vary which makes it hard for a part time job. However, I may see if there could be a set 1 day I can have off and look for a family who needs 1 day (which I haven't seen but it doesn't hurt to keep looking). I will inquire about "how long would you guys be able to accommodate the extra day." Honestly, even at 40 hours I would only be bringing home an extra $100 week (taxes suck!). I make $25 an hour and my only responsibilities are engaging with children (indoor and outdoor) feeding them and just cleaning up after them, nothing else. She did mention they have talked about asking me to come an extra day but they didn't know if I would (which I don't really believe, I just think they don't want me to leave because I am really good with their children and dependable despite this situation).

I hate this position I am in and I worry they would be on edge with me but I am willing to address with them that if I decide to continue with them, I will stay and I understand how they may feel moving forward. The same family who offered me the guest room also said they would be willing to give me reoccurring date nights per month to help with income.

I am moving to V.A for a new scenery with a roommate so the rent will be about the same. I will be even more closer to D.C. However, commuting would be much shorter if I worked and lived in V.A but its not a deal breaker for me.

[Anonymous]

Things I would take into consideration if I were in your shoes are:

Commute time to and from work. Points for whichever job has the easiest commute.

If you are in a share now, I think just working for one family would be less stressful. With a share, you have to deal with two sets of parents and their expectations for discipline, meals, naps, activities, etc. Points for only working for one set of parents.

Which job is the most fun?

Which job do you think would last the longest?


Personally, I would probably stay with what I am already familiar with if I liked working for them.

[Anonymous]

When you say that you would "take home the same amount," is that the same amount as the share at 30 hours? Or the share at 40 hours?

Also, $25/hr for an extra 10 hours is $250. You would really end up paying $150 tax on that? Even if that's accurate, for a single person with no dependents and no deductions, that puts you in the 25% tax bracket, so you would get some of that back at the end of the year.

I agree with considering whether working for one family with OT outweighs shorter hours with the share families.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:When you say that you would "take home the same amount," is that the same amount as the share at 30 hours? Or the share at 40 hours?

Also, $25/hr for an extra 10 hours is $250. You would really end up paying $150 tax on that? Even if that's accurate, for a single person with no dependents and no deductions, that puts you in the 25% tax bracket, so you would get some of that back at the end of the year.

I agree with considering whether working for one family with OT outweighs shorter hours with the share families.

Im not at OT with nanny share. It would be 40hrs total which is $1000 per week.
The single family offered $21 with OT at $31.50 that's $997 per week (5 hours of OT).

With the nanny share, I would ask for a raise in a few months for my anniversary ($1.00-$1.50 per family). As I mentioned before, it was the hours and I've had a few issues but if they are willing to accommodate my hours and work on their lack of communication, maybe I'll stay.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:When you say that you would "take home the same amount," is that the same amount as the share at 30 hours? Or the share at 40 hours?

Also, $25/hr for an extra 10 hours is $250. You would really end up paying $150 tax on that? Even if that's accurate, for a single person with no dependents and no deductions, that puts you in the 25% tax bracket, so you would get some of that back at the end of the year.

I agree with considering whether working for one family with OT outweighs shorter hours with the share families.

Im not at OT with nanny share. It would be 40hrs total which is $1000 per week.
The single family offered $21 with OT at $31.50 that's $997 per week (5 hours of OT).

With the nanny share, I would ask for a raise in a few months for my anniversary ($1.00-$1.50 per family). As I mentioned before, it was the hours and I've had a few issues but if they are willing to accommodate my hours and work on their lack of communication, maybe I'll stay.

I'm a MB, and I'm always telling the people who post here that it's ridiculous to pay a huge premium for part time hours as some on this board advocate ($25+/hr to get someone for half time). My feeling is that you should just pay a reasonable rate, and use more hours. I have the same advice for you: unless there's something you like a lot better about job #2, fewer hours and more time to yourself would see the way to go.

[Anonymous]

You don't get paid for holidays, but they can afford to pay you more? They sound cheap

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:When you say that you would "take home the same amount," is that the same amount as the share at 30 hours? Or the share at 40 hours?

Also, $25/hr for an extra 10 hours is $250. You would really end up paying $150 tax on that? Even if that's accurate, for a single person with no dependents and no deductions, that puts you in the 25% tax bracket, so you would get some of that back at the end of the year.

I agree with considering whether working for one family with OT outweighs shorter hours with the share families.

Im not at OT with nanny share. It would be 40hrs total which is $1000 per week.
The single family offered $21 with OT at $31.50 that's $997 per week (5 hours of OT).

With the nanny share, I would ask for a raise in a few months for my anniversary ($1.00-$1.50 per family). As I mentioned before, it was the hours and I've had a few issues but if they are willing to accommodate my hours and work on their lack of communication, maybe I'll stay.

I'm a MB, and I'm always telling the people who post here that it's ridiculous to pay a huge premium for part time hours as some on this board advocate ($25+/hr to get someone for half time). My feeling is that you should just pay a reasonable rate, and use more hours. I have the same advice for you: unless there's something you like a lot better about job #2, fewer hours and more time to yourself would see the way to go.

"Using more hours" translates to less time to be responsible for your own child. Good thing not all parents are like you.

[Anonymous]

Go with new job.

[Anonymous]

New job. You already quit your old jobs and they won't forget that even if they are generally reasonable people

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:When you say that you would "take home the same amount," is that the same amount as the share at 30 hours? Or the share at 40 hours?

Also, $25/hr for an extra 10 hours is $250. You would really end up paying $150 tax on that? Even if that's accurate, for a single person with no dependents and no deductions, that puts you in the 25% tax bracket, so you would get some of that back at the end of the year.

I agree with considering whether working for one family with OT outweighs shorter hours with the share families.

Im not at OT with nanny share. It would be 40hrs total which is $1000 per week.
The single family offered $21 with OT at $31.50 that's $997 per week (5 hours of OT).

With the nanny share, I would ask for a raise in a few months for my anniversary ($1.00-$1.50 per family). As I mentioned before, it was the hours and I've had a few issues but if they are willing to accommodate my hours and work on their lack of communication, maybe I'll stay.

I'm a MB, and I'm always telling the people who post here that it's ridiculous to pay a huge premium for part time hours as some on this board advocate ($25+/hr to get someone for half time). My feeling is that you should just pay a reasonable rate, and use more hours. I have the same advice for you: unless there's something you like a lot better about job #2, fewer hours and more time to yourself would see the way to go.

I agree.

It's not like Target or McDonalds offers a higher hourly salary for its part-time employees.
Or most companies for that matter.

I honestly do not see why part-time Nannies should be paid more than full-time ones.
Sure, they do not receive the benefits that full-timers make but that is because they do not work as much!

[nadiaoliviaw]

Hello, I'm Nadia from Indonesia, I'm going to be an Au Pair. Does anyone want to give me some advice or want to give info about that?

[Anonymous]

Let's be clear, although part time nannies don't work the same amount of TOTAL hours as full time nannies, they are still working 10-12 hour shifts, 3-4 days per week (that's long). Plus, take into consideration that they have more than 1 child most times.

The hourly rate wasn't the issue, it was the hours to bring home more money- as we all understand that things happen throughout life and in the end, you have to do what needs to be done, to survive!

Regardless if you are a part time or full time nanny the amount of hours you work should have nothing to do with your hourly wage. It's the number of children and the amount of work and responsibilities are needed for the position. If you have 2 children that are both home all day and under the age of 4, you should not make less than $20- if OT is in there, than okay, maybe $18. This is my opinion.

For a nannyshare, this works in the nanny and parents favor. The nanny brings home more and the parents pay less for childcare. My opinion, nannyshares should start at $25 (that's $12.50 per family) which is reasonable, considering the children WILL be on separate schedules, until you can get them on the same page. You are dealing with 2 families, who may have different opinions, and what works for the other family may not work for them, so you will need to please both families.

look how much a 4 or 5 star child care center charges for children. You are doing way much more than a teacher. You cook, clean, wash dishes, laundry, vacuum, let the dog out, take the children on outings that may involve walking long distance, driving, metro, plan daily activities to promote development etc. Nannies work very hard, both part time and full time nannies.

[Anonymous]

I've decided to stay with my current families. We've discussed the elephant in the room "trust" - thanks for those bringing that up and they reassured me that they understood and because they trust and love me, they wanted this to work. They even informed me they shared with some friends that I do babysitting and was willing to put out an ad for me to find something for the 1 day I am off. I did apologize for not coming to them first, and letting them know my issues because I knew (well I thought I knew) they didn't need extra days. I believe everything will be ok and I may just do something special for them to show my appreciation- I just don't know what yet.

Thanks for all the opinions!!