Work-from-home mom asking nanny to take kids out of house all day

[Anonymous]

We are acquainted with a wonderful lady who works as a nanny for a family that lives in a 2-bedroom apartment. She cares for 2 children -- a baby and a 3-year-old.

The MB works from home each day, and the MB needs it to be very quiet so that she can conduct conference calls, etc. The MB is relieved to have the ability to work from home because she doesn't waste time commuting, which is understandable.

The problem is that the MB asks the nanny to have the kids out and about all day long. It was easier before the baby came along, but now both kids need to eat, sleep, and play all outside of their home while their mom works. This seems sad to me and I know that the nanny finds it to be a huge challenge (as she has shared this with me as she occasionally works for us on Saturday evenings and I've known her for a long time.) For example, she'll have the baby in the carrier, but the 3- year-old will try to run away. This gets tiring after a while.

I suggested to the nanny that perhaps the MB could go to the library or Starbucks to work, but apparently that's not an option.

I feel bad for the kids, and wonder if anyone has experience with this type of situation. I've offered to the nanny that she could bring the kids to our house during the day, but she doesn't dare raise it with the MB because she thinks that would sound like someone questioning her parenting. (I am not acquainted with the MB.)

When you work from home, unless you have a large home, perhaps daycare is a better option than having a nanny.

[Anonymous]

That mother is being ridiculous.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:That mother is being ridiculous.

This. How selfish of that mother. I'd quit.

[Anonymous]

Ask for a double stroller and sign up the 3 year old for activities.

[Anonymous]

I have never been a fan of daycare but it seems like the only solution for this family. Your friend, the nanny, should suggest it and quit. That sounds like a horrible and unsafe nanny job. Unhealthy for the kids as well.

Why in the world would you open you house for them, OP? That is a huge liability and a huge commitment.

[Anonymous]

OP here. The MB and her family are sponsoring the nanny for a green card, and so she definitely has no desire to quit. She just feels bad for the children, and she does the best we can.

We employ a nanny to take care of our kids, and we try to make things as nice as possible for her to do her job.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We are acquainted with a wonderful lady who works as a nanny for a family that lives in a 2-bedroom apartment. She cares for 2 children -- a baby and a 3-year-old.

The MB works from home each day, and the MB needs it to be very quiet so that she can conduct conference calls, etc. The MB is relieved to have the ability to work from home because she doesn't waste time commuting, which is understandable.

The problem is that the MB asks the nanny to have the kids out and about all day long. It was easier before the baby came along, but now both kids need to eat, sleep, and play all outside of their home while their mom works. This seems sad to me and I know that the nanny finds it to be a huge challenge (as she has shared this with me as she occasionally works for us on Saturday evenings and I've known her for a long time.) For example, she'll have the baby in the carrier, but the 3- year-old will try to run away. This gets tiring after a while.

I suggested to the nanny that perhaps the MB could go to the library or Starbucks to work, but apparently that's not an option.

I feel bad for the kids, and wonder if anyone has experience with this type of situation. I've offered to the nanny that she could bring the kids to our house during the day, but she doesn't dare raise it with the MB because she thinks that would sound like someone questioning her parenting. (I am not acquainted with the MB.)

When you work from home, unless you have a large home, perhaps daycare is a better option than having a nanny.

I suspect her MB would jump on this solution. Are you sure that's something you'd be willing to do? Just to give the kids a place to nap and the nanny a place to sit.

This sounds borderline ... something. I don't want to say "abusive" or "neglectful," since the children are safe, fed, and with a loving caregiver, but it's like they live in a homeless shelter rather than a home.

I agree that daycare would be a much better solution for this mom, though I understand the green card situation.

[Anonymous]

It does sound problematic but it's also none of your business OP. I'd be careful of overstepping.

[Anonymous]

This is really tough. I met a nanny in a situation like this as well. She worked for a nanny share but both set of parents work from home so no way can she stay in the house with the kids at either homes. And you sound like a caring person to suggest her come to your house but. I think the best thing for her to do is to look for a new position with WORKING AWAY PARENTS and use you as a reference. Her current situation is too messy to bear. This is why I decided since 2014 I am never again working for people at home. No way!

[Anonymous]

Some parents are truly reckless in their expectations. I feel so sorry for those children.

[Anonymous]

She should talk to the MB about how hard it is. Maybe they could split the day so the kids are out in the morning but home after lunch. She can go somewhere else for a few hours in the afternoon.
Where do they eat lunch when it is cold out?

[Anonymous]

If I were the nanny I'd take the kids to my house on that day, even if it's just for lunch and naps.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. The MB and her family are sponsoring the nanny for a green card, and so she definitely has no desire to quit. She just feels bad for the children, and she does the best we can.

We employ a nanny to take care of our kids, and we try to make things as nice as possible for her to do her job.

the best we can? Op is this really about you? You need to quit this job and forget the green card

[Anonymous]

How can one sponsor a nanny? I thought you had to qualify for a H1B visa, that the foreigner is a highly skilled person you can't get from US residents and must bring from abroad. Or is the MB embassy people sponsoring the nanny on something else? Op, if you care for the nanny, I'd have her look into the sponsorship part more carefully.

As for your kind offer, I think I'd jump at it if someone offered to me. But it might get tiring in the long run, OP. You are too kind.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:How can one sponsor a nanny? I thought you had to qualify for a H1B visa, that the foreigner is a highly skilled person you can't get from US residents and must bring from abroad. Or is the MB embassy people sponsoring the nanny on something else? Op, if you care for the nanny, I'd have her look into the sponsorship part more carefully.

As for your kind offer, I think I'd jump at it if someone offered to me. But it might get tiring in the long run, OP. You are too kind.

I assume it's a relative, or a relative of a friend, and this is the job that guarantees she won't be a drain on the economy.