Pregnant single nanny

[Anonymous]

I've wanted a child for a long time and used donor sperm to become pregnant as I am single. I am thrilled to be pregnant! This has been a conscious decision so I have been saving up in the last two years and have enough to last me and the baby for probably a year and a half, provided there are no extraordinary health issues (I live in a country where healthcare is a universal right, so my prenatal appointments/birth/paediatrician would be free).

Nannies, if you had a fairly normal pregnancy, how long were you able to work before you had to stop? I look after a 4yo and a 6yo so no lifting or excessive physical labour is required of me, and there's no sign of morning sickness at 8 weeks now, so I have high hopes I'll be fine. I'm sure that my employers would be absolutely fine with me working pregnant (I know them well, but there's also a baby who has his own nanny because he has special needs so there are two adults in the house most of the time, in case of an emergency). I'm just trying to make a plan - I realise everyone's pregnancy is different, but I'm still curious.

And if there are single nannies, what sort of childcare did you choose for your own child when it was time to get back to work?

[Anonymous]

I would never hire a single mother Nanny.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would never hire a single mother Nanny.

How is this an answer to any of my questions? Kindly read before replying.

[Anonymous]

If you have a normal, healthy pregnancy and you are otherwise healthy, you should be able to work right up to your due date as in any other profession (within a week or so, obviously, to give time for transition).
Pregnancy is not a medical condition, you are not sick/disabled!!

Congratulations, OP!

[Anonymous]

Hi op. I'm an RN and worked up until the day I delivered. Definitely had to have some help with things when my belly got in the way, but with the ages of your charges, you should probably be OK!

I think your best bet is to try to find a job where you can bring your baby. The pay tends to be lower, but you'll be paying for care one way or another.

[Anonymous]

What is your child care plan? You need to talk to your employers about it. Congrats

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What is your child care plan? You need to talk to your employers about it. Congrats

I plan to stay home for about a year and then look for a new nannying position. My lovely current employers will be moving next spring right around my due date so I am not worried about retaining the job.

So I'm really looking forward to hearing from nannies who are single parents since we have less of a support system than a two parent household. What nanny job arrangement worked best for you? Bringing baby to work, daycare, nanny share, family helping out?

[Anonymous]

I have not done this, but I have friends who have juggled single motherhood or just motherhood in general with being a nanny. The main thing that I would say is that you should be careful that you are not assuming that your best case scenario is what will happen. So you might very well be able to work right up until a week or so before delivery, but you should have a plan in place for how all of you will handle it if you need to go on bed rest. Likewise, if you have savings accrued that would allow you to live with no income for a year and a half, that does not mean that you should wait a year before looking for work. If I were you, I would get through the newborn phase, and then immediately start looking for jobs that will allow you to bring your child. First of all, there are simply fewer jobs that are open to that, secondly, think about how important it is to find a good fit with a family when the only factors are your personality and the families personality. When you add in your child's personality and needs, it makes it all much more complicated. So you are needing to be even more selective, and you are drawing from a smaller pool of potential jobs. The result is that it can take a really long time to find the perfect fit. So if I were you, I would start looking right away so that you have plenty of time. Beginning to look for work early would also enable you to take on part time work, or temporary work so that you are living partially off of the income from your job and partially off of savings. If you did this wisely, you could potentially stretch your year and a half savings until your child was three, at which time you could potentially put your child in preschool, significantly improving the likelihood that a family will be willing to work with you. Your description makes it sound as though you are assuming that everything will go smoothly, which can definitely be a concern because if there is one thing that is true about childbirth and child rearing it is that things seldom go according to plan.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What is your child care plan? You need to talk to your employers about it. Congrats

I plan to stay home for about a year and then look for a new nannying position. My lovely current employers will be moving next spring right around my due date so I am not worried about retaining the job.

So I'm really looking forward to hearing from nannies who are single parents since we have less of a support system than a two parent household. What nanny job arrangement worked best for you? Bringing baby to work, daycare, nanny share, family helping out?

I was a single parent nanny and my child came with me. The physician parents who employed me did not expect me to lower my rates for them. They simply wanted the best person for their child.

[Anonymous]

I took care of 8 months old when I had my own child (I worked till the end of pregnancy. Got home at 6pm and had my baby girl the very next morning). I brought her to work with me (I stayed home with her for the first 2 months). I wasn't very hard to find families who were ok with my child being with me but some of them expected to pay less (and I did/do understand it). When DD turned 2 I put her in home day care so she can socilize with other kids and lear how to be seperate from me.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What is your child care plan? You need to talk to your employers about it. Congrats

I plan to stay home for about a year and then look for a new nannying position. My lovely current employers will be moving next spring right around my due date so I am not worried about retaining the job.

So I'm really looking forward to hearing from nannies who are single parents since we have less of a support system than a two parent household. What nanny job arrangement worked best for you? Bringing baby to work, daycare, nanny share, family helping out?

I was a single parent nanny and my child came with me. The physician parents who employed me did not expect me to lower my rates for them. They simply wanted the best person for their child.

That's great, but most will and rightfully so.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would never hire a single mother Nanny.

Me too. I don't want to take any risk. I.e - pay lots of $$$$$ if you injured while watching my kids inside my house.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote: I have not done this, but I have friends who have juggled single motherhood or just motherhood in general with being a nanny. The main thing that I would say is that you should be careful that you are not assuming that your best case scenario is what will happen. So you might very well be able to work right up until a week or so before delivery, but you should have a plan in place for how all of you will handle it if you need to go on bed rest. Likewise, if you have savings accrued that would allow you to live with no income for a year and a half, that does not mean that you should wait a year before looking for work. If I were you, I would get through the newborn phase, and then immediately start looking for jobs that will allow you to bring your child. First of all, there are simply fewer jobs that are open to that, secondly, think about how important it is to find a good fit with a family when the only factors are your personality and the families personality. When you add in your child's personality and needs, it makes it all much more complicated. So you are needing to be even more selective, and you are drawing from a smaller pool of potential jobs. The result is that it can take a really long time to find the perfect fit. So if I were you, I would start looking right away so that you have plenty of time. Beginning to look for work early would also enable you to take on part time work, or temporary work so that you are living partially off of the income from your job and partially off of savings. If you did this wisely, you could potentially stretch your year and a half savings until your child was three, at which time you could potentially put your child in preschool, significantly improving the likelihood that a family will be willing to work with you. Your description makes it sound as though you are assuming that everything will go smoothly, which can definitely be a concern because if there is one thing that is true about childbirth and child rearing it is that things seldom go according to plan.

This is very helpful, actually! I do think I'm largely envisioning everything going well when I should really be planning a worst case scenario as well. Thank you!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
I was a single parent nanny and my child came with me. The physician parents who employed me did not expect me to lower my rates for them. They simply wanted the best person for their child.

You're so lucky! I don't have high hopes of finding a family who'll allow me to bring my child along but I hope that I could work for someone who would allow me to bring them in with me once in a blue moon.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would never hire a single mother Nanny.

Me too. I don't want to take any risk. I.e - pay lots of $$$$$ if you injured while watching my kids inside my house.

OP here. Again, how is that helpful to me or answers in any way my questions? And also, how would you even find out I am a single mother? Do you think I'm going to get it tattooed on my forehead? Provided I even tell you I have a child (doubtful) would you then ask him how I'm raising them? What prejudiced bullshit. And why do you expect to pay lots of $$$$$ if I am injured watching your children? How would it be more $$$$$ than if it were Bessie from down the street watching your children?