Our nanny is pushing to sleep train

[Anonymous]

My 6month old daughter is sleeping like crap and we haven't really found a solution to help her sleep. My nanny mentioned sleep training just about every day now. I feel she's to young.

She also watched my 3 year old son (he is in preschool now) at that age and we did not sleep train him he fell into a nice sleeping pattern without any sleep training.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My 6month old daughter is sleeping like crap and we haven't really found a solution to help her sleep. My nanny mentioned sleep training just about every day now. I feel she's to young.

She also watched my 3 year old son (he is in preschool now) at that age and we did not sleep train him he fell into a nice sleeping pattern without any sleep training.

6 months old isn't too young. Pediatricians say you can start sleep training at 4+ months. You don't have to do an all out CIO. You can do gentler approaches. You're the parent. If you don't want to sleep train, don't, but don't expect the nanny to get her sleeping if you are unwilling to try some method of sleep training.

[Anonymous]

6 months isn't too young.

That doesn't mean you have to do it, but it doesn't get more fundamental than good sleep.

Some kids just need help, so just because your first was easy in this regard that doesn't mean anything for your second. She's a different kid.

Figure out a way to help her get better sleep - it is such a basic and important thing for everyone.

[Anonymous]

What exactly does the nanny want to do?
What exactly do you want to do, OP?

[Anonymous]

Your nanny can see that your baby is exhausted. What you are doing isn't working. 6 months is objectively NOT too young, according to basically every sleep expert. You don't have to sleep train, but if I were your nanny I wouldn't be happy in a position where parents aren't open to fixing such a basic problem as a chronicqlly undertired baby. It's one thing to disagree about the best approach, but you are shutting down the conversation altogether, even though you clearly don't know anything about the topic (given that you admittedly didn't do anything to train baby 1 and if you had read even a single sleep book you would know that 6 months is a fine age for sleep training).

[Anonymous]

Op doesn't want to sleep train so the baby's exhausted when she gets home and she doesn't have to deal with him or her they just go to sleep.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My 6month old daughter is sleeping like crap and we haven't really found a solution to help her sleep. My nanny mentioned sleep training just about every day now. I feel she's to young.

She also watched my 3 year old son (he is in preschool now) at that age and we did not sleep train him he fell into a nice sleeping pattern without any sleep training.

I did not ST my daughter until she was over a year old because I was against CIO and she was a good (not great) sleeper until she hit 9.5 months. Could I do it over again, I would have ST'd her MUCH SOONER, like six months. We used the Sleep Lady method, which is much gentler than modified and full CIO, and I think totally okay at that age. My daughter at 18 months sleeps more per day than she did at six months and I feel guilty for not having had her learn to self-soothe sooner. I totally understand your hesitation to ST your daughter, but why don't you use the Sleep Lady approach and see how that works. It takes time to ST anyway so if the SL method doesn't work, your daughter will be that much older if and when CIO becomes your next option.

[Anonymous]

I agree with PP's that 6 mos is not too young. We did it at 5 months and have no regrets. I am a big believer in doing what works for you and/or your family. If what you are doing works for you all, then keep doing it. If it is not working then you need to change the way you do something.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Op doesn't want to sleep train so the baby's exhausted when she gets home and she doesn't have to deal with him or her they just go to sleep.

Sounds to me like a chronically overtired baby who wakes a lot at night and naps poorly. OP doesn't want to sleep train because it makes her feel special when baby needs her all night, but nanny has to actually deal with the exhausted, miserable baby the next day.

[Anonymous]

You don't ever have to do CIO if you don't want to. She works for you, you are the parent.

That said, she isn't too young at all for non-CIO sleep training.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Op doesn't want to sleep train so the baby's exhausted when she gets home and she doesn't have to deal with him or her they just go to sleep.

Sounds to me like a chronically overtired baby who wakes a lot at night and naps poorly. OP doesn't want to sleep train because it makes her feel special when baby needs her all night, but nanny has to actually deal with the exhausted, miserable baby the next day.

OR, more likely, when nanny says she wants to sleep train she wants to be allowed to CIO and OP is opposed to CIO which is her right as a parent.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Op doesn't want to sleep train so the baby's exhausted when she gets home and she doesn't have to deal with him or her they just go to sleep.

Sounds to me like a chronically overtired baby who wakes a lot at night and naps poorly. OP doesn't want to sleep train because it makes her feel special when baby needs her all night, but nanny has to actually deal with the exhausted, miserable baby the next day.

OR, more likely, when nanny says she wants to sleep train she wants to be allowed to CIO and OP is opposed to CIO which is her right as a parent.

It's also the parent's "right" to hunt for a new nanny every couple of months. But perhaps the child should have a right to a stable caregiver.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Op doesn't want to sleep train so the baby's exhausted when she gets home and she doesn't have to deal with him or her they just go to sleep.

Sounds to me like a chronically overtired baby who wakes a lot at night and naps poorly. OP doesn't want to sleep train because it makes her feel special when baby needs her all night, but nanny has to actually deal with the exhausted, miserable baby the next day.

OR, more likely, when nanny says she wants to sleep train she wants to be allowed to CIO and OP is opposed to CIO which is her right as a parent.

It's also the parent's "right" to hunt for a new nanny every couple of months. But perhaps the child should have a right to a stable caregiver.

Not via child neglect.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Op doesn't want to sleep train so the baby's exhausted when she gets home and she doesn't have to deal with him or her they just go to sleep.

Sounds to me like a chronically overtired baby who wakes a lot at night and naps poorly. OP doesn't want to sleep train because it makes her feel special when baby needs her all night, but nanny has to actually deal with the exhausted, miserable baby the next day.

OR, more likely, when nanny says she wants to sleep train she wants to be allowed to CIO and OP is opposed to CIO which is her right as a parent.

It's also the parent's "right" to hunt for a new nanny every couple of months. But perhaps the child should have a right to a stable caregiver.

Not via child neglect.

This is not a place for your militant anti-cry it out point of view. The original post states that the baby is not sleeping well. All it says is that the nanny would like to try sleep training. There are literally hundreds of different approaches to sleep training, and a dozen different approaches that are pretty common. We have no idea how much crying the nanny is envisioning. What we do know is that the child's basic biological need for sleep is not currently being met. If you are more interested as a parent in cleaning with religious fervor to a particular parenting methodology then you are in meeting your child's needs, you are a bad parent.

[Anonymous]

Clinging, not cleaning