Fear of losing nanny

[Anonymous]

DC's nanny has taken a second job with a very wealthy and high-profile family on weekends. She is earning $6 more per hour with this family than with us. The weekend family has a beautiful home both here and a vacation home and I know her job is much easier than with us who live in an apartment without a yard or a lot of space.

Nanny took the job with us because it is within walking distance to her home and now we have to move to where she would need to drive. She also took the job with us because we have just one child and now I am pregnant with number 2. And she used to work just 34 hours a week and now we need her for 44 to 45 hours a week.

I am afraid we are going to lose her. We cannot afford (honestly) to pay her more. We are renting and DH is still in graduate school. I know Nanny is devoted to my child but... Well, we simply cannot compete with the salary or perks she gets from her weekend job.

What, if anything, can I do?

TIA

[Anonymous]

Nothing. Either she likes you enough to stay with you or she doesn't. I wouldn't invest too much time thinking and worrying about something you have no control over. Don't be an asshole or micromanaging boss and let the chips fall where they may.

[Anonymous]

Does the other family even require full time care?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Does the other family even require full time care?

OP here and yes. The other family currently has a weekday nanny as well. And our nanny is truly a great nanny.


And to the other PP - I don't micromanage but I have made decisions for DS that I know Nanny disagrees with (potty training, for example, nanny thinks we should have started at 18 months but I want to wait until after DS is 2). Nanny always does as I request but does make her opinion known.

[Anonymous]

Does your nanny know how much you appreciate her? You should tell her frequently, mentioning the things that she does for DC that you especially appreciate.

[Anonymous]

14:23 here:

I wouldn't worry the. Since they already have someone. Then they would lose the weekends with your nanny and risk her getting burned out. They probably feel loyal to the current nanny and have a nice contract with her. If they are well to do people the other ft nanny probably earns her pay and may have stepped it up also knowing about yours. A conversation doesn't hurt though if you just want reassurance. I wouldn't start kissing her butt or anything lol but I would let her know she is appreciated

[Anonymous]

Be appreciative and generous with praise. Nannies are actual human beings - treat your nanny as you would want to be treated.

You may well lose her but know that you did everything you could to make her want to stay in your employ.

[Anonymous]

Wait so she went from working 35 hours a week to 45 and you didn't increase her pay?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Wait so she went from working 35 hours a week to 45 and you didn't increase her pay?

OP here no - her hourly rate is the same with the exception of 5 hours at time and a half. We simply cannot afford anymore.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Wait so she went from working 35 hours a week to 45 and you didn't increase her pay?

OP here no - her hourly rate is the same with the exception of 5 hours at time and a half. We simply cannot afford anymore.

Oh well with that being said, she's probably trying to get on at the weekend job after all. I know that I would be looking for a better position if I were her. No offense op but nannies need to climb up the payscale, pay bills, put food on the table etc like everyone else. It may be a good thing when she gives you notice. That way you can readvertise your position and make adjustments to hire within your budget or just find a different form of care if you can't really afford to have a full time nanny.

[Anonymous]

Your nanny is gone, OP. Even if she doesn't go with this particular high profile family full-time, her agency will have another high-profile/high paying job lined up for her in no time now (provided she does well in this weekend position).

Feel lucky that you had a nanny of that caliber for as long as you did. But she is already gone...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Your nanny is gone, OP. Even if she doesn't go with this particular high profile family full-time, her agency will have another high-profile/high paying job lined up for her in no time now (provided she does well in this weekend position).

Feel lucky that you had a nanny of that caliber for as long as you did. But she is already gone...

I disagree. Some people don't need to go for the biggest bucks. Do you know anyone like that, pp?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Your nanny is gone, OP. Even if she doesn't go with this particular high profile family full-time, her agency will have another high-profile/high paying job lined up for her in no time now (provided she does well in this weekend position).

Feel lucky that you had a nanny of that caliber for as long as you did. But she is already gone...

I disagree. Some people don't need to go for the biggest bucks. Do you know anyone like that, pp?

Not PP but I agree - OP's nanny is history. As much as we love our charges, OP's nanny has a future to think about and plan for. She is already gone...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:DC's nanny has taken a second job with a very wealthy and high-profile family on weekends. She is earning $6 more per hour with this family than with us. The weekend family has a beautiful home both here and a vacation home and I know her job is much easier than with us who live in an apartment without a yard or a lot of space.

Nanny took the job with us because it is within walking distance to her home and now we have to move to where she would need to drive. She also took the job with us because we have just one child and now I am pregnant with number 2. And she used to work just 34 hours a week and now we need her for 44 to 45 hours a week.

I am afraid we are going to lose her. We cannot afford (honestly) to pay her more. We are renting and DH is still in graduate school. I know Nanny is devoted to my child but... Well, we simply cannot compete with the salary or perks she gets from her weekend job.

What, if anything, can I do?

TIA

Families move on from nannies, and vice versa all the time. Just be fair, honest and have open communication. If you have to do a search process again, so be it -- I'm sure you're wiser and have better questions to ask. Your child is resilient and will roll with any transition. They are tons of available nannies out there, and not just at back to school time.

Don't create any unnecessary brain damage for yourself on this - childcare is supposed to help you, not be a .
PITA.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Wait so she went from working 35 hours a week to 45 and you didn't increase her pay?

OP here no - her hourly rate is the same with the exception of 5 hours at time and a half. We simply cannot afford anymore.

Oh well with that being said, she's probably trying to get on at the weekend job after all. I know that I would be looking for a better position if I were her. No offense op but nannies need to climb up the payscale, pay bills, put food on the table etc like everyone else. It may be a good thing when she gives you notice. That way you can readvertise your position and make adjustments to hire within your budget or just find a different form of care if you can't really afford to have a full time nanny.

Actually a majority of nannies will take an $800/ week 50/ hr a week job over a parttim even 30 hour a week job, I?f they need to pay the bills. More hours does not mean a higher rate, it's quite the opposite of. We pay our former FT nanny more per hour, now that we only need her after school, it is not the same bug total as fulltime but we all found it works well.