Chronically late nanny

[Anonymous]

Our nanny, who was very punctual when she started with us, is now late at least 10 minutes and often much more every day. How do I broach this with her in a way that won't create resentment? We really like her otherwise.

[Anonymous]

Politely remind her of her start time, and that you really need to leave on time. If it continues, give a written warning, followed by letting her go if this is a deal breaker for you. Maybe ask her if something has changed making it difficult to get to you right on time. Also, be sure your own house is in order before pointing fingers. If you are 10 minutes late frequently, you may be giving her the impression that the schedule is more fluid than you mean it to be.

[Anonymous]

This is OP, I'm always early.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This is OP, I'm always early.

Sorry, I didn't mean to sound accusatory. I just meant that if you are late often, saying something about her lack of punctuality before you address your own is sure to cause resentment. Since that is not the case, brining up the issue in a polite matter of fact way is probably the best way to go. Mention other things she does well, but don't be afraid to address the issue.

[Anonymous]

Ask her if she can please come 5-10 minutes early, and see what she says... and does.

[Anonymous]

Praise, critique, praise.

Tell her how happy you are generally - which you genuinely are, it sounds. Then say there's just one point that you need to address and that is the start time. While you understand being 10 minutes late seems rather minute, for you it throws off your commute and your boss really expects you to be on time, so you don't have the flexibility that you'd like to be able to offer. Ask if there's anything you can do it make it easier for her to be on time - like maybe if you park elsewhere, the nanny can park in your drive way?

Then close with more praise.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Praise, critique, praise.

Tell her how happy you are generally - which you genuinely are, it sounds. Then say there's just one point that you need to address and that is the start time. While you understand being 10 minutes late seems rather minute, for you it throws off your commute and your boss really expects you to be on time, so you don't have the flexibility that you'd like to be able to offer. Ask if there's anything you can do it make it easier for her to be on time - like maybe if you park elsewhere, the nanny can park in your drive way?

Then close with more praise.

I say screw that. The nanny has to be on time because THAT IS HER START TIME. Period. Even if the MB works from home, even if the MB isn't working at all. You leave whenever you have to leave in order to get to work on time. Period. You don't get to work when YOU think your boss needs you there. You get to work when you were TOLD YOUR START TIME IS. Period. If the nanny needs to account for ten minutes to find a parking spot, then the nanny needs to add that into her commute time.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Praise, critique, praise.

Tell her how happy you are generally - which you genuinely are, it sounds. Then say there's just one point that you need to address and that is the start time. While you understand being 10 minutes late seems rather minute, for you it throws off your commute and your boss really expects you to be on time, so you don't have the flexibility that you'd like to be able to offer. Ask if there's anything you can do it make it easier for her to be on time - like maybe if you park elsewhere, the nanny can park in your drive way?

Then close with more praise.

I say screw that. The nanny has to be on time because THAT IS HER START TIME. Period. Even if the MB works from home, even if the MB isn't working at all. You leave whenever you have to leave in order to get to work on time. Period. You don't get to work when YOU think your boss needs you there. You get to work when you were TOLD YOUR START TIME IS. Period. If the nanny needs to account for ten minutes to find a parking spot, then the nanny needs to add that into her commute time.

Not every parent cares to cycle through a couple dozen sitters to find Mary Poppins.

Btw, if you do find her, you get different challenges to work with, don't you?

[Anonymous]

OP I have had the same issue with ours. I had a sit down with her and that worked for a month or two. She is great overall so what I did was to push reporting time 30 minutes early before the time I need her. Her commute is about 45 minutes to an hour depending on traffic so more traffic than usual throws her off. I take the train to work so I can't afford to be late.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP I have had the same issue with ours. I had a sit down with her and that worked for a month or two. She is great overall so what I did was to push reporting time 30 minutes early before the time I need her. Her commute is about 45 minutes to an hour depending on traffic so more traffic than usual throws her off. I take the train to work so I can't afford to be late.

Good solution.

[Anonymous]

I've had a nanny long enough now that I agree with the OP. Give yourself some buffer time on either end of her start/ending time. It's worth the extra $$ not to be so anxious about her arriving on time, or to have to worry if you need to talk at the end of the day.

However, this would still bug me, and I'd sit down and talk to her about it. I would probably point out that by the end of the week, you're paying her for an hour of time she's not working, and that you're not willing to continue doing that. And then leave it up to her.

[Anonymous]

Perhaps she's due for a raise, and hasn't received it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Praise, critique, praise.

Tell her how happy you are generally - which you genuinely are, it sounds. Then say there's just one point that you need to address and that is the start time. While you understand being 10 minutes late seems rather minute, for you it throws off your commute and your boss really expects you to be on time, so you don't have the flexibility that you'd like to be able to offer. Ask if there's anything you can do it make it easier for her to be on time - like maybe if you park elsewhere, the nanny can park in your drive way?

Then close with more praise.

I say screw that. The nanny has to be on time because THAT IS HER START TIME. Period. Even if the MB works from home, even if the MB isn't working at all. You leave whenever you have to leave in order to get to work on time. Period. You don't get to work when YOU think your boss needs you there. You get to work when you were TOLD YOUR START TIME IS. Period. If the nanny needs to account for ten minutes to find a parking spot, then the nanny needs to add that into her commute time.

PP that you're quoting here and I threw that in as a polite way to sound accommodating, yet firm in expectations, and to open to the door to hear if there is actually anything you can to do about it - probably not, but it's nice to ask. There is an art to managing people and keeping morale up. You get better work out of people when you treat them well.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Praise, critique, praise.

Tell her how happy you are generally - which you genuinely are, it sounds. Then say there's just one point that you need to address and that is the start time. While you understand being 10 minutes late seems rather minute, for you it throws off your commute and your boss really expects you to be on time, so you don't have the flexibility that you'd like to be able to offer. Ask if there's anything you can do it make it easier for her to be on time - like maybe if you park elsewhere, the nanny can park in your drive way?

Then close with more praise.

I say screw that. The nanny has to be on time because THAT IS HER START TIME. Period. Even if the MB works from home, even if the MB isn't working at all. You leave whenever you have to leave in order to get to work on time. Period. You don't get to work when YOU think your boss needs you there. You get to work when you were TOLD YOUR START TIME IS. Period. If the nanny needs to account for ten minutes to find a parking spot, then the nanny needs to add that into her commute time.

PP that you're quoting here and I threw that in as a polite way to sound accommodating, yet firm in expectations, and to open to the door to hear if there is actually anything you can to do about it - probably not, but it's nice to ask. There is an art to managing people and keeping morale up. You get better work out of people when you treat them well.

I totally agree w/ this poster in terms of how to finesse a conversation like that. Treat people decently, make your expectations clear, and make it about the job/work - not about the person. All the better if you can couch it in ways that indicate you're really quite pleased with her overall and want to see if there are solutions to this. (As opposed to just assuming she's lazy. PP's ideas about parking elsewhere for instance may only serve to facilitate the conversation but the general attitude behind that kind of approach is far more likely to succeed that one that presumes more negative intent.)

[Anonymous]

Simple solution.

Just switch up your start time ten minutes earlier.

Works like a charm every time.

Problems solved.