Are we expecting too much from our nanny?
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Anonymous
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We have a nanny who cares for our 7 month old baby for 4-6 hours a few days a week. We pay her $15 hour. If I am home when she is here she gets a 30 minute lunch break. She is very loving to our baby and reliable and we really appreciate that quality in her. However during the times that we've been home when, we've noted that she spends a significant amount of time texting or surfing the web on her Ipad and Iphone, making personal phone calls, studying her school work, etc.
Our hope is that she would interact with our daughter: read baby books, sing, talk to her, tummy or sitting time, teach vocabulary while watching nursery rhymes by stating what is flashed on the screen, etc. I've asked her nicely to do these things. But I've noticed that our nanny will do them for maybe 15 minutes and then return to doing her own thing again. Ive give our nanny credit that she does keep her eye on our baby, but its often done by placing the baby in the play yard or jumperoo while she sits next to her and surfs the internet. Our baby has become very easy to care and doesn't cry out of boredom or from a dirty diaper. If the baby does get board in the play yard, I've seen our nanny just put baby einstein on her Ipad and set it down on the floor next to the baby to watch, while our nanny texts on her phone. Other times when I've asked our nanny to do things like read books, she has told me that "it is ridiculous to read baby books"....or "that its just as good if she reads her school work out loud." Or when I've asked the nanny to practice sitting with our nanny she responded "that its not necessary because all babies will eventually sit without practice, they may not do it on time, but they will eventually." The only chore we ask our nanny to do other than care for our daughter is to vacuum our small living room where she lays our baby on the floor...and she will do that. Often she will empty our dishwasher too without even being asked. One day she even moped our kitchen floor. But my guess is that our nanny may be spending about 75% of her time her (outside of lunch break) doing her own thing while just keeping an eye on her daughter. She seems to get board with our baby. When I've asked her to interact more, she got angry and said "it is ridiculous to expect her to interact with our baby the whole time she is here!" She complained that our house is small, its too cold outside for walks and that we won't let her go on outings with our baby to the mall, etc. I emphasized I'm not asking her to interact the whole time, but out of say a 4-6 hour period, at least 3 hours of interaction seems reasonable to me (especially since we are paying $15/hr for one baby). She disagrees. I'm I expecting too much? |
Anonymous
| I agree that there isn't much point practicing sitting, but other than that I'm fully on your side. I would start looking for someone else since you've tried talking to her and she won't change |
Anonymous
| If this is a real post, you need a new nanny. She's terrible. |
Anonymous
| Fire her. She isn't doing her job and clearly doesn't know what her job is if she does this in front of you. |
Anonymous
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I think she is basically doing what a babysitter does.
Just sitting with your baby, making sure he is safe and sound and that is all. What you want is someone who not only does all of the above, but someone who also teaches, engages and interacts and stimulates. This just isn't a good match and since you have already spoken to her about what you want and she hasn't responded that she is willing to change for you, you have no other option but to kindly part ways. |
Anonymous
+1 |
Anonymous
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She should not talk back to you and tell you that you are wrong for wanting her to read to the baby or practice sitting.
Also a baby that age should not watch tv even baby Einstein. Listening to music is nice but not watching tv. You should have a talk with her and not let her talk back. You make the rules and she follows or she can leave. |
Anonymous
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Many moons ago, I babysat. I interacted with the babies and kids the ENTIRE TIME they were awake, unless I absolutely had to pee. Then I would get them involved in something and run to the bathroom.
You are her boss, and you get to dictate what you want done, and how you want the job done. Get someone else. If it were summertime, I'd tell you that a 13 year old would make a great babysitter for you. fire this person. |
Anonymous
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Your baby is only 7 months old.
Let her live her baby life. She doesn't need to be read to everyday and to have her nanny teach her vocabulary. She's not about to speak anyway ... It looks like your nanny is bored because she can't get out. Going to the mall isn't a bad idea. Your baby would enjoy the stroll, seeing colors, people, see other babies etc. I wouldn't let it be a habit but maybe once in a while, it can be a fun outing. Why don't you let your nanny go out ? Do you, as a parent, stay at home all weekend and interact with your baby 100%? Yes she is the nanny and is paid for that but let's be honest, it can be boring to watch just one baby. The day can be long, especially if you can't go out due to the weather. Maybe she could join a group with other nannies or young moms etc. Your baby would be happy and so would your nanny. |
Anonymous
| MB here: This person is not a proper nanny. Get rid of her asap and get a real nanny. But you should let her take your child out. |
Anonymous
| Definitely fire this nanny. She's terrible. |
nannydebsays
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If this is for real, you have hired a barely competent babysitter. She sounds horrid, and you could surely do better.
I do think when you hire your new nanny you should absolutely let her take baby on BABY FOCUSED outings. Babies learn by experiencing the world around them, and by having loving, interactive caregivers. I am not sure "the mall" is a good choice, but a music class, a library, a playground or the zoo would be good places to go. Just for reference, here's a typical day with a 7 month old in my care: Firstly, I talk to my charges. I narrate our day, ask questions and wait for "answers", sing and read books -Wake up, bottle, food -I clean up, baby plays briefly in exersaucer. -Check to see if laundry needs to be done while carrying baby with me -Floor time with music playing. NO SCREENS. Use toys to encourage baby to creep/crawl -Nap. I transfer laundry or do other quick chores, prep lunch, and check my phone/make calls -Wake up, bottle, food -I clean up, baby does independent play on a nearby blanket with some toys -Outside for fresh air or an activity -Nap -Bottle -Books and music, more outside time, etc. -Catnap if needed -Welcome parent home. |
Anonymous
| Bored not board. $15.00 an hour is basic pay. You get whst you pay for but reading a book to a 6 month old is ridiculous. Mine were more interested in chewing on them. |
Anonymous
I'm leaning towards this being not real.I don't think any parent even a firstimer would have trouble realinbg this is OK. I'm leaning towards more veiled attempts at trolling\ insulting nannies all they do is play on their phones and insist on $15. But, if this is real I agree with nanny deb 110%. This is what I do with my infant charges. I do incorporate independent play for infants but this consists of them playing in the exersaucer or blanket with toys while I load dishwasher all of five minutes. I also read to infants. I'm surprised at the number of nannies that don't read and don't see the importance of it. I have wondered why so many parents stress wanting a nanny that reads now I know. |
nannydebsays
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| PP, when nannies say reading doesn't matter with babies because "they don't pay attention", I wonder how the nanny plans to TEACH the child to pay attention to books. If you read it (even for just a minute) they will come to love books! |