Hellish commute RSS feed

Anonymous
I took a job a few months ago with a family who lives roughly 25 miles away from me. It's supposed to be a 30 minute drive, and when I came to interview with them it was the middle of the day on a Sunday and traffic wasn't a problem. I knew I would battle some traffic in the morning and evenings, but underestimated just how much. It's taking me on average and hour and a half to get to work in the morning, and sometimes even then that does not cut it and I'm 5 mins late and I hate being late. The commute is killing me, and public transportation is not an option as they want me to use my car to drive their kids around. I don't know how much longer I can deal with the commute. Do you think that's a valid enough reason to give notice? I know I'm not as patient or as fun as I could be, because I am always a giant ball of stress by the time I get to work in the morning.
Anonymous
I would quit if I could afford to. It would be kind to give them as much notice as possible, though.
Anonymous
There's no such thing as a "valid enough" reason for giving notice. If you're unhappy (and it sounds like the commute is making you miserable) then give them as much notice as you can and start job hunting. Good luck!
Anonymous
I did the same commute for 1.5 years. It pushed me to the edge of my sanity. It's definitely time to start interviewing.
You'll be much happier. Good luck OP.
Anonymous
Sounds awful OP. FWIW, if I were the parent it would worry me also - I wouldn't want our nanny facing a commute like that in the winter and I'd worry about absences etc...

Give as much notice as you can and move on. Good luck.
Anonymous
If you do, which is reasonable, give them enough time to find a new nanny and don't leave them hanging.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Sounds awful OP. FWIW, if I were the parent it would worry me also - I wouldn't want our nanny facing a commute like that in the winter and I'd worry about absences etc...

Give as much notice as you can and move on. Good luck.


+1. Honestly, if I was familiar with the area, I probably wouldn't have hired you in the first place, having had my own experiences with the draining nature of long commutes. When we lived in a trafficky area like DC, I screened candidates for location as well as qualifications. I understood that it was a little unfair since some people wouldn't have minded the drive, but I want a rested, happy nanny, not a stressed, late, tired nanny.
Anonymous
OP here. Thank you all for your thoughtful input. I'm not located in DC, but another major city. Winters aren't typically bad here, so that is not a concern. In all honesty, when I interviewed with them I told them I was thinking about relocating to their area. Problem is, they don't pay me enough to do that!
Anonymous
I am surprised the family didn't tell you about the traffic issue when you accepted the job. If the traffic is that horrible in the mornings during the week, I am very sure they know about it. It is kind of irresponsible not to ask you what direction you are going to be coming from every day. My bosses and I have always discussed this however I reside in CA where everyone discusses traffic!

But yes, I think it is wise for you to give notice. That is just too long for you to commute for a job. If possible, I would try to stay w/them until they can find a suitable replacement however, if you can handle it. They should be able to do this within 2-3 weeks.

Good luck and I hope you find another position closer to home!
Anonymous
Pp are you serious? It is not your employers responsibility to tell you about traffic. An intelligent person would research it themselves. This is OPs fault for not doing some google mapping before accepting the position. I always do that.
Anonymous
OP, if you told the family you were going to relocate to their area, and now will be quitting because you don't like the commute, that's kind of crummy, especially in the context of "they don't pay me enough to relocate".

Sounds like you really wanted/needed the job so you misrepresented yourself to them (and the job/commute issues to yourself).

It doesn't make you sound like you have your act together.
Anonymous
OP again, and I did do Google mapping, on an hour and twenty minute commute days, Google maps always estimates it will take me ~55 minutes to get to work. I'm not some irresponsible idiot, I'm someone who took a job, naive to just how bad the commute would be. I work 50 hours a week and am "salaried", so no overtime. Rent near where this family lives cost upwards of two weeks of my pay, unless I want to live somewhere unsafe. So don't act like I'm some terrible nanny. I stayed with the last family I was with for almost 6 years.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:OP again, and I did do Google mapping, on an hour and twenty minute commute days, Google maps always estimates it will take me ~55 minutes to get to work. I'm not some irresponsible idiot, I'm someone who took a job, naive to just how bad the commute would be. I work 50 hours a week and am "salaried", so no overtime. Rent near where this family lives cost upwards of two weeks of my pay, unless I want to live somewhere unsafe. So don't act like I'm some terrible nanny. I stayed with the last family I was with for almost 6 years.


Well actually you are an idiot if you took a job with no OT. You just lost any sympathy I had for you. Give ample notice. It's not their fault.
Anonymous
If you're otherwise happy with the job, could you explain to them how draining such a long daily commute is and tell them you're going to start using public transportation and ask them to provide you with a car for kid related activities?
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:If you're otherwise happy with the job, could you explain to them how draining such a long daily commute is and tell them you're going to start using public transportation and ask them to provide you with a car for kid related activities?


This is stupid. It doesn't sound like OP is all that great (not because she's a bad nanny but because she's stressed and tired) so it seems pretty silly to think a family would drop several grand to buy a new car for an ok nanny
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