If you had/have a Stage 5 Clinger What did you do?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:“Come be part of the family, working as an AP in America!”

“Leave us alone so we can have time as a family, you clingy AP!”

I cannot think of a single family member I would want to spend ALL of my non-working time with. Part of being in the AP program is being a good roommate. That means being present often enough that we get to know you and absent often enough that you don’t dramatically alter the dynamic of our family dynamic. Join us for dinner and special outings and vacations? The more the merrier! Camp out in the common areas of the house expecting us to fulfill 100% of your need for friendship and human connection? Too much.

I’m sorry for you. I take remember spending every minute of every single childhood summer with my grandmother, great-grandmother and two siblings. As an adult, I take a couple months to do the same thing whenever I can. My great-grandmother passed three years ago, but my grandmother and I still have fun. Every few years, my sister and I coordinate so we’re both with her at the same time.

Some people are comfortable with family and genuinely enjoy being with family, even for long hours. I’m sorry you don’t. Obviously, you need to search for APs that value family time the way you do, not someone like OP’s AP (or me).

Lol, so are you saying house families should be surrogate grandmothers for these grown women? Spending every waking hour with their house families? Like that's normal? Okaaay then.

No. I’m saying that I feel sorry for someone who can’t stand to spend a week with her own children, let alone anyone else.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:“Come be part of the family, working as an AP in America!”

“Leave us alone so we can have time as a family, you clingy AP!”

I cannot think of a single family member I would want to spend ALL of my non-working time with. Part of being in the AP program is being a good roommate. That means being present often enough that we get to know you and absent often enough that you don’t dramatically alter the dynamic of our family dynamic. Join us for dinner and special outings and vacations? The more the merrier! Camp out in the common areas of the house expecting us to fulfill 100% of your need for friendship and human connection? Too much.

I’m sorry for you. I take remember spending every minute of every single childhood summer with my grandmother, great-grandmother and two siblings. As an adult, I take a couple months to do the same thing whenever I can. My great-grandmother passed three years ago, but my grandmother and I still have fun. Every few years, my sister and I coordinate so we’re both with her at the same time.

Some people are comfortable with family and genuinely enjoy being with family, even for long hours. I’m sorry you don’t. Obviously, you need to search for APs that value family time the way you do, not someone like OP’s AP (or me).

Lol, so are you saying house families should be surrogate grandmothers for these grown women? Spending every waking hour with their house families? Like that's normal? Okaaay then.

No. I’m saying that I feel sorry for someone who can’t stand to spend a week with her own children, let alone anyone else.

Who said they could not stand to spend a week alone with their kids? Random.

Most kids are not like the OPs AuPair. Mine certainly are not, we have been home alone going on 5 days now and my kids enjoy doing their own thing like reading book, playing video games, talking to friends (my 10yr old is face-timing right now). My kids have not followed me from room to room since they were toddlers. I can't imagine following my grandma around from room to room, but I guess we are all different.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here with an update.

You all were correct. We have initiated rematch. More than just being a stage 5 clinger she takes constant management and has recently exercised very poor judgement.

We are leaving the program and could not be happier. We are so relieved. Our LCCs response was "I'm surprised you lasted this long, I will not be recommending her to another family."

Wow OP, I bet in hindsight with this quarantine you really dodged a bullet. I have a great AuPair and even she is grinding on my nerves.

Your timing was pretty spectacular.