Nanny with a kid

[Anonymous]

I hired a nanny with a child. I have very mixed feeling about it. But my situation is slightly different in that my nanny has zero childcare or support for her dd and she's here a lot and all summer, holidays - more than just occasionally.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I hired a nanny with a child. I have very mixed feeling about it. But my situation is slightly different in that my nanny has zero childcare or support for her dd and she's here a lot and all summer, holidays - more than just occasionally.

If you have "mixed feelings" about it, why continue? Is it your best option for now?

[Anonymous]

Yes, it is the best option for now. My nanny does not see the arrangement as a nanny share. Her dd has school pick up across town so my younger DS spends an extra hour a day in the car seat. Then they sit in a parking lot for 20 min waiting for my other DS to get out of school. There are other annoyances. Like, I can't leave for work on time without her kid being dropped at before care so I'm just late every day. But the nanny is loved by my kids and reliable so I am trying to see the bigger picture. I do not feel she favors her Dd over mine so that has never been a downside for us. She's professional in that sense.

[Anonymous]

I think you should set some parameters, ie - nanny has childcare arranged for her core hours and bringing her child is a perk equivalent to back-up care. Snow days, teachers development days, spring break - all fine. But not all summer. Ask her to explain her summer care plans to you. If they're vague and generic, then that probably means she has no plans.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Yes, it is the best option for now. My nanny does not see the arrangement as a nanny share. Her dd has school pick up across town so my younger DS spends an extra hour a day in the car seat. Then they sit in a parking lot for 20 min waiting for my other DS to get out of school. There are other annoyances. Like, I can't leave for work on time without her kid being dropped at before care so I'm just late every day. But the nanny is loved by my kids and reliable so I am trying to see the bigger picture. I do not feel she favors her Dd over mine so that has never been a downside for us. She's professional in that sense.

Newsflash. Your nanny absolutely favors her DD over yours. Evidence is bolded.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. Thanks for the responses.

One other question is whether any MBs on this board have had nannies with kids (around this age) who have come to work sometimes and have any advice either way. This nanny comes with glowing references, including when she brought her kid sometimes. I think she's great, but as another PP said, I'd like to negotiate things that are important in advance, or if it's going to be a disaster, walk away now.

I agree that the issue is not the the nanny has kids it's that the nanny may bring the kids with her sometimes.

I offered to let my nanny bring her kids occasionally. She did it once, and they (her kids) were so much trouble for her that she never did it again.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. Apparently she has in laws who can take the kid for breaks, and perhaps camps for summer. Guess I should ask about summer.

It is demeaning to the.nanny's child that you keep referring to him as "the kid." He is the nanny's son and deserves to be referred to with respect.