MB continually asks me to do things she, herself, cannot or will not do.

[Anonymous]

The reason that a nanny may be asked to do things that a parent does not do (whether it's a matter of not wanting to, or not being able) is because focusing on and taking care of the child is your full-time job. The hours in which that is the only demand on my time is very limited - I'm always also cleaning, doing laundry, cooking for the whole family, ensuring that relatives get their weekly communications from the kids, giving the school what it needs. That naturally limits what tasks I have the bandwidth for. I'm not nearly as bad as the MB in what OP describes, but there are certain tasks I don't do any more (or rarely do now) because those tasks fit squarely within the job description of a nanny and having some one else do those allow me more flexibility to play with the kids and complete all the other 'off limits' tasks i can't ask of the nanny.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The nature of a job is paying someone else to do thing you don't have the time, desire, or ability to do. Welcome to the working world.

I'm a MB, and I will bite. I have a nanny for many more hours than I work (I work very part time). Here is why. Without a nanny, I do not have the

1. Time: to spend one-on-one time with all four children every day. Cook a dinner which takes an hour. Go to appointments. Exercise. Nap if the baby was up all night.
2. Desire: to play kid games like Candyland. Go to the park and swing, and swing, and swing. Go to every week of Music Together, or My Gym. Drive, drive, drive.
3. Ability: to give baths (I can, but I have a bad back, and I specifically hired a nanny to take this chore off my plate. I cannot bend over for even the short time it takes to bathe a toddler without a lot of pain). to come up with "fun" motivations for cleaning or other "have-to-dos." My nanny has an ECE degree; she has lots of ideas for activities I would never come up with.

So basically you have outsourced almost the entirety of motherhood to the lowest bidder? Interesting.

LOL thats all i could think to reading that so sad

Really? All you do all day is play Candyland, swing, give baths, and drive? We do a lot more here.

I would say 1) spending one on one time with your children, 2) cooking dinner for your family, 3) taking your children to doctors appointments, 4) playing games 5) going to the park, 6) pushing your kids on a swing, 7) give them baths, 8) take them to music and gym classes .... seems like 95% of parenting to me. But hey, as long as she gets home and remembers to go into their room and give them a kiss as they sleep, and if she has time to leave them an "I love you note" at the breakfast table for when they wake up since they never see her then I guess she is a good mother!

What you are is you can't read very well. She said without the nanny she would not have had time to spend one-on-one with all of her four children, take them or herself to appointments, or cook dinner. Since the nanny is around, she DOES have time to give each child individual attention, take them to appointments and cook dinner, taking care of her family's nutritional needs. The nannies are so good at badmouthing women who keep a roof over their heads and food on their tables.

[Anonymous]

I would be annoyed having to walk 2 miles each way in the summer heat. Did they tell you in the beginning that they wouldn't want you driving.

[Anonymous]

I would the bathing and cooking as a compliment, OP. She cannot do alone for her child what you do alone for him everyday.

The walking thing is different. I am sure you are in better shape than she is but still - a four mile round trip in DC summer heat is excessive to ask of anyone.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The reason that a nanny may be asked to do things that a parent does not do (whether it's a matter of not wanting to, or not being able) is because focusing on and taking care of the child is your full-time job. The hours in which that is the only demand on my time is very limited - I'm always also cleaning, doing laundry, cooking for the whole family, ensuring that relatives get their weekly communications from the kids, giving the school what it needs. That naturally limits what tasks I have the bandwidth for. I'm not nearly as bad as the MB in what OP describes, but there are certain tasks I don't do any more (or rarely do now) because those tasks fit squarely within the job description of a nanny and having some one else do those allow me more flexibility to play with the kids and complete all the other 'off limits' tasks i can't ask of the nanny.

I think you missed OP's point - she accepts that bathing the child and cooking for him are part of her job but it seems strange that MB can't do either of those things for her child when she is alone with him on weekends. I am sure MB feeds and washes her kid when the nanny isn't working. MB inability to do these tasks alone doesn't change OP's job at all.

I say it is a compliment to the nanny.

[Anonymous]

I think she's complimenting you. But it does seem a little bit like she's expecting too much of you (at least with the 2-mile walk, unless you're okay with it).