Are we a good candidate for an au pair?
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Anonymous
| Alright, well anyway. If you don't like the consecutive days thing (like for us who only use our au pair for split schedules 25 hours a week anyway and rarely use weekends), then that might be a consideration when choosing agencies. |
Anonymous
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Except for the mandatory one weekend off per month, we always schedule our AP for a 1/2 day on Saturday. Usually this is Sat AM. But if we need her Sat. eve, we give her Sat AM free. We're on AP#2, did this schedule with both APs, and they've never complained.
During the school year they work less than 45 hours - split schedule of 1.5 hours in the AM, then 3.5-4 in the afternoon, M-F. In the summer they are fulltime all day M-F - we don't schedule any weekend work during summer. |
Anonymous
Again, totally fine if you're not with Cultural Care. If you are with Cultural Care, this is against THEIR rules (but not the State Dept regs) because she's not getting a *consecutive* 1.5 days off. |
Anonymous
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We are with Cultural Care now, after years with APIA (and if APIA would bring male APs over, then we would switch back in a second). Our CC LCC looked at me like I had four heads when I said something about not being allowed to ask our AP to work on Sat nights without giving him Monday mornings off due to the consecutive rule with CC. She had absolutely no idea what I was talking about and didn't interpret the rules this way at all. So at least our cluster with CC doesn't follow this approach to scheduling (she is, OTOH, very strict about the 10 hr/45 hr rules, which she should be - we don't come close on either so these are non-issues for us).
Our AP works two weekend shifts per month, discussed and agreed on during matching. Usually it is Sat night but sometimes it's either Sat or Sun am, to watch one child while we take the other to a swim meet. Because our version of "going out at night" usually includes being home by 10:30 or 11, AP doesn't seem to mind it at all, as half the time he would just be leaving to go out at that time anyway. I agree with the HM who replied that OP will need to interview and select very very well for an AP who can handle the multiple challenges of your job. We had one AP in our 7 years in the program who could have done your job. She was a regular AP, not extraordinaire, but she had two years of FT work as a pediatric physical therapist and was extremely capable and just an all around amazing person. She ended up staying in the US and getting her Master's in special education - she is extremely ambitious and brought her skills and her ambition to bear on being an AP. You need someone like that, and you'll be fine, but don't let the agencies tell you that you're being too picky or that you should settle for an AP without FT work experience. We don't have a very hard job anymore (it used to be), so we are fine and happy with 19 year olds with not much experience but a lot of energy and smarts, but in your case, you won't want to settle for anything less than the best trained and experienced. |
Anonymous
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Good point about not letting the agencies try to tell you you're being too picky. That's how we ended up with our non-extraordinaire mediocre au pair. We decided to switch to a regular au pair after our first great year thinking we'd give it a try. We told Cultural Care (they have to match the candidate to you) that we only wanted someone with full-time experience with kids (in a daycare or as a nanny/sitter) and they acted like that was too much of an ask and they'd never find someone for us. We waited and waited and they kept matching us with candidates with well below the experience level we wanted until final we just said ok and took someone that sounded good enough. Of course, having never worked a full-time job before and having only babysat occasionally, she had no idea what to do with kids and didn't even seem to like them that much.
Stay firm on your requirements and make the agencies work for you. Don't settle. |
Anonymous
New Poster here. I use 3 Sat nights almost every month. It's never been an issue because: - I made it very clear upfront in the matching process - I'm flexible about getting the au pair's input on which weekend is the off-weekend and about additional time off when a special event arises - My au pairs who liked to go out would usually go out at 11 or so when we'd get back (which is when they would go out anyway) - For my less party-centric au pairs I always invited them to have a a friend over (or a few, or her boyfriend which is the case with my current AP) with them for Sat night so they could hang out after the kids go to bed - I'm (considered) a really good host in just about every other area. For example, I've had au pairs' close friend or two sleep over nearly weekend; I allow my au pair to have her boyfriend stay over; I took invited my au pair's (visiting) parents to join us on our vacation and they stayed with us on our vaca rental. I've always asked my AP candidates to talk to my former au pairs so they could get a sense. I wanted to get an au pair who wanted to family who would make them really feel like part of the family and would give that more weight than working Sat nights. It's ok that that's not all for all au pairs, but it's led to EXCELLENT matches for our family and very close looooong lasting bonds. The point is that there are no hard and fast rules about what makes a good host family beyond be honest and considerate, make sure your AP candidates know all the "bad" before matching, and generally be a good person to her. |
Anonymous
| Why do you want an aupair over a new live in nanny ? If your older children are in school full time I wouldn't worry about them not thinking she's that much fun. Can you put them in after school activities to keep them active and entertained ? Also for 23,000 a year you could get a live in nanny. |
Anonymous
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Our nanny is live out. So the cost is about 45k a year, for 40 hours.
So an au pair is much less expensive, plus I really wated the big kids to have someone excited to play, swim, etc. But after reading the responses and some other sites, I think we will wait a couple more years before we switch to an au pair. |
Anonymous
| I'm just saying live in nannies are cheaper. I'm a full time live in nanny and I make 20k per year. |
Anonymous
Depends on where you live. Not in the DC/MD/VA area, I assume. .. |
Anonymous
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I've worked in northern Virginia for the last 15 years. I'm American born and raised, speak fluent English. and have a associates degree in early childhood education.
Most of the families I work for just can't afford to pay huge child are costs. And I understand that. There great bosses and love there kids. I wish I made more money of course but a lot of people around here can't afford it. |
Anonymous
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I think with 3 kids you are asking a lot. Also the hours are tough. And the weekends are not free
She still has to be available for snow days, early release, summers. Maybe this is not the program for you |
Anonymous
| I'm not sure why people on this board always say live in nannies are cheap. Live in nannies are not always cheaper. There are a lot of live in jobs that pay considerably more because the employers wants the flexibility and consistency of having someone live in. It can also more difficult to find good, experienced nannies who want and/or are willing to live in. |
Anonymous
I used to be an Aupair for two years, now a Nanny! I totally agree with the above! Plus an Aupair for 4 children is a lot and usually you don't get an Aupair that ever had nanny experience before. Sure, they tell you they are Kindergarten teachers in their home country and they are infant experienced but there is nothing compared to being an Aupair/nanny. If you really consider an Aupair, make sure she is over 25 to be mature enough to handle 4 kids, she has nanny (and i'm not talking about babysitting) experience. |
Anonymous
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I know of one au pair who helped out at a day care during high school and got her required hours for child care to qualify for the program. This does not mean that helping in the afternoons after school makes the person a competent professional nanny who is able to meet the family's demands.
Work hours are 45 per week. Regardless of whether or not the previous week you only needed 20 hours |