Feeling Hurt
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Anonymous
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I will try to keep this short.
I was asked to nanny for my close friend ( and mentor) who is a foster mom when she took on 5 kids under 2.5. Only 2 days a week. I quit my pt job so I could be accommodating to her. Things started off well but after my very first day alone with all 5 kids (about the second week ) they said to me that they expected the house spotless ( and mentioned a few other things about my nannying judgment ) they have 4 kids of their own who homeschool so I am home with 9 kids in my own. Yes their kids are expected to stay out of my way but it doesn't always happen. I felt really hurt by them commenting in the cleanliness of the house as I have known them for 3 years and it is not common for there house to be clean. I obviously didn't leave the house in a mess but I had 5 little kids who didnt nap at the Same time and has to get them all in the car for a visit with mom. It was a lot of work!!! This happened about 2 months ago but I still feel hurt by the comments. Second comes pay. Because they are foster kids the government pays for child care. It is NOT at all a fair rate! 15 an hour. My friend knows I deserve more but it is what it is. This money does not come out of the $ they are paid to care for the kids. It's a completely sperate cheque. Originally I was told I would be paid for 16 hours regardless if I worked them because the government was paying. Well that hasn't been the case. There has been 2 stats and I haven't been paid for either one. They are pocketing the $. It doesn't se fair to me. I feel hurt and betrayed by them. I have poured so much of my heart time and money into there family. FOster kids included! I don't feel valued or appricated. Vent done |
Anonymous
| I have brought up stats and they say well we wouldnt choose to have care on the 2 days you are available. |
Anonymous
| Quit. |
Anonymous
| by the way i should also mention, I am a nanny and have been a nanny for about 4 years. this isnt just some babysitting! i have education and know what Im doing with kids. My friend (mb) was a nanny in her early years! we have a lot in common and we used to be like family! |
Anonymous
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They're "pocketing" the money on expenses aside from childcare. If you agreed to $15, why are you complaining about it now? Did you agree to the tasks she is asking of you?
Either way, I do agree that it's too much to handle, just quit. |
Anonymous
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They are giving a cheque each month for 16 hours a week at 15 dollars an hour. They are taking the $$ from stats and pocketing it instead of giving me the holiday. Originally MB had said I would be paid the amount of the cheque every month
I never agreed to 15 an hour either, I was told they were trying to negotiate 20 an hour. that was a big step up from my current job so I quit. then found out the ministry (government) was only going to pay 15. I was willing to help them out tho. We had no agreed upon extra duties beyond childcare. |
Anonymous
| they are given not giving |
Anonymous
| They are not good people, OP. I am sorry. You need to get away from them. |
Anonymous
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I am sorry this is happening to you OP. Unfortunately what is happening here is that the truth is emerging...the truth is that the true colors have emerged that this lady/mentor is not and never was your friend at all. Sad, but true.
She sounds to me like a liar slash con-artist and I am quite sure this was not an overnight thing. It just reared it's ugly head now. I say leave the job and the so called "friendship" alone and walk away. Count your losses and count this as a lesson learned. Do not be so trusting in the future. Do not necessarily be jaded toward everyone who wants to be your friend, but be a little more cautious about people who seem like they are trying to swindle you like this lady did. Best of luck to you OP. You didn't deserve any of this. |
Anonymous
| You are a babysitter. $15 an hour is more than reasonable. It does not matter if the kid are biological or foster kids. If anything, I hope you went through a background check for the foster kids. And, I question if this is true as I can't imagine foster parents getting 5 kids under age two along with 4 of their own. There are lots of rules. |
Anonymous
Did you read her earlier post? She's a nanny not a babysitter. |
Anonymous
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At $15 per hour part time for 5 under 3, she is a babysitter. Babysitters do not do housework especially with so many children. You need to leave the position immediately. If you don't want the friendship to be ruined than lie and say you have another obligation to tend too now.
This woman like other foster parents use these children as a way to gain more income. It is unfortunate but the children are just pay checks to them. I would never have accepted this position unless I was directly receiving my pay from the government agency. She could receive free daycare for these babies if she requested it but instead is finding an alternative way to make more money off of them. By hiring you she gets her house cleaned and holiday pay. For all you know she could be receiving a higher amount to pay you but pocketing it. She is no mentor, she's a con artist |
Anonymous
| You need to leave the situation. She is taking advantage of your friendship. If you want any type of friendship with her in the future, move on now. This is why you don't mix business with friends. |
Anonymous
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How odd they would place five kids under 3 in the same house at the same time.
Yes, OP, you should quit. |
Anonymous
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The reason there are 5 kids under 3 is because 3 of them are siblings. They had only 3 kids and there was a tragity with the mom of one and the other 2 siblings were in transition homes for a month as there was no place for them. I have been nannying foster kids for 2 years as know the system very well.
Thank you guys. I have a feeling mostly it's her Husband and she is speaking what he says to me as he was the one who commented in the cleanliness of the house and other rediculous things. For example. The first and second week I worked over and above my normal hours and the eldest girl who was just in the house for 1.5 weeks had grown VERY attached to me. She would cry as soon as my friend wold come upstairs and cling to me. I went to pick her up AS I WAS LEAVING to give a hug and say see you tomorrow and the husband says we don't sways pick them up every time try CRy. I said yep. Gave her a kiss on the cheek and left. They are good people and love the kids in their care. I have to stay friends with her as her own kids are special to me and we go to the same church and vollenteer and the same groups. I just feel let down and heart broken by the sneaky lies and I feeling unvalued |