Junk Food Nanny...Part II. [UPDATE] OMG!

[Anonymous]

Fellow nannies and parents, I would like to say thank you all so much for responding to my topic. I mean, the responses were overwhelming. Some helpful, some not so, many bashed me for lacking any common sense, etc. But I want to thank everyone nevertheless. From the OP.

Just wanted to provide a crazy update.
CAUTION: * Spoiler Alert!! * {Just joking!}

For those that advised my MB was on a power trip, you guys were 120% on the mark. The issue wasn't really about my diet or how I was negatively influencing her sons. It was about advancing her own agenda and sitting on her soapbox smirking at me. Again, it was completely unfair of her to tell me I had to bring my own lunch every day, then criticize my meal choices since they obviously didn't mesh w/her lifestyle. She made it seem like if the boys witnessed me munching on Oreos, they in turn would be negatively influenced and start asking for cookies as opposed to carrots for snacks. That I had a responsibility as a nanny to model healthy eating behavior. Since I was in HER home, she had every right to dictate my food choices. Are you guys really for real on all this??! How uneducated are you all?

Anyway, today I brought in a water bottle. SmartWater which I grabbed from my fridge and took to work today.
When my MB saw it in the fridge she asked me if it was mine. Duh much????? Of course, I said it was and I asked if there was a problem w/me storing my drink in the fridge. {Because she seemed upset, I assumed it was because my water bottle was taking up too much room, after all SmartWater bottles are pretty tall.}
She then made a snorty noise and told me from now on, she would appreciate it if I didn't bring plastic bottles into her home again. She told me I could purchase a stainless steel water bottle online for about six dollars like she did. She even instructed me to write down a website where I could do so. Then she went on to lecture me how only 7% of plastic can effectively be reduced and that plastic bottles just took up landfill space. She then tried to use her sons as an example to me. She said if I cared anything about my charges, I would do the right thing and ban plastic altogether since most of it cannot be recycled. She then asked me if I used plastic hangers at home and I admitted that I did. Then another lecture. I tried so hard not to roll my eyes. I don't disagree w/anything she said, but at this point I realized she just wants everyone else to conform to her beliefs. Again, I live in a free country and as a tax paying citizen, I have every right to do what I want. My parents already raised me. The luxury of being an adult is being able to live as I choose. If I want to eat hot cheetos w/my ham sandwich for lunch, then I have the fundamental right to. Same w/drinking from a plastic water bottle.

Later on in the day, I was putting Vaseline {petroleum jelly} on my lips {I prefer it to chapstick} and she stood in front of me and asked if my ointment contained petroleum. When I said it did, she then asked me not to apply it in her home and went off on some tirade about petroleum, etc. Honestly, I didn't understand what she was talking about.
At this point, I was just fed~up w/all the lectures already so I said I would be willing to eat all healthy/organic if she would provide my lunches. I also stated that I would bring my SmartWater from home in a stainless steel bottle from now on if she would provide the bottle.'
She looked at me like I was asking for a million dollar bonus!!

When her husband came home, I heard her whispering to him in the front room and when I saw them both, they both looked at me kinda funny.

After much thought, I am not going to work for this Type A Control Freak any longer.
I cannot stand another day in her presence.
After I get my check on Friday, it will be "Hasta Lavista Baby!"

[Anonymous]

The bottom line, you are not a good fit for the job. Move on and next time, find a junk food loving, doesn't give a crap about the planet, or their kids, kind of family.

[Anonymous]

I was one of the MBs who responded to your original post defending your right to eat what you want, but suggesting that a good compromise to set a good example for the children might be for your MB to buy the food. But after reading this, I have to say that I am a whole lot less sympathetic and mighty glad you aren't my nanny. While I think if your MB was that concerned about foods/environment she should have used her interviews to find someone who shared those concerns, and she doesn't sound like a gem of a person to know or work for, you are also intractable. If you think the country is so free that you just get to do whatever you want, whenever and however while at work, I suggest you start your own business. And for everyone's sake, not a child care business.

[Anonymous]

Thanks for the update! I'm an MB and I think your MB sounds completely crazy and out of line. I will say, previously I was definitely of the "I don't think this is about control" mindset but it just goes to show how little we actually know about these situations when we start giving our comments because clearly this really was all about pushing her agenda. FWIW I don't think it's wrong for a parent to be concerned about your food choices in front their children. If you ate oreos in front of them every day they WILL want to eat the oreos instead of carrots and I don't blame a parent for not wanting that. But beyond that issue this woman is completely out of control and has no right to ask you to make ANY of these other changes. If it doesn't affect her kids in a direct way she doesn't get to dictate what kind of bottle you drink your water in or what lubricant you use for dry lips. I obviously don't know this woman but if it makes you feel better I don't think this is just about controlling you. She sounds like the type of person who would also try to lecture her friends and family about their lifestyle choices too.

[Anonymous]

I am a nanny and didn't think she was out of line for requesting you make healthier food choices in front of the kids. However, lecturing you about the evils of plastic and Vaseline and dictating every single product you use crosses the line for me. Everyone has a right to their beliefs and kudos to her for being so environmentally conscious but if this stuff was such a big deal it should have been addressed during the interview process. She should have been upfront during the interview and she would have had a better chance of hiring a nanny who is a better fit for their lifestyle. I couldn't work for them. I'm not saying they are wrong in any way for how they live their lives but it's over and beyond what I'm willing to do.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am a nanny and didn't think she was out of line for requesting you make healthier food choices in front of the kids. However, lecturing you about the evils of plastic and Vaseline and dictating every single product you use crosses the line for me. Everyone has a right to their beliefs and kudos to her for being so environmentally conscious but if this stuff was such a big deal it should have been addressed during the interview process. She should have been upfront during the interview and she would have had a better chance of hiring a nanny who is a better fit for their lifestyle. I couldn't work for them. I'm not saying they are wrong in any way for how they live their lives but it's over and beyond what I'm willing to do.

+1
Completely agree.

[Anonymous]

I take a huge smart water to work every day. The giant sized bottle helps me to be sure I'm drinking enough every day and I like the added electrolytes. Good luck finding an aluminum bottle that size! Trying to dictate every little thing you do is a clear indicator that she just wants to control everyone's lives. How does using plastic hangers affect her children?!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The bottom line, you are not a good fit for the job. Move on and next time, find a junk food loving, doesn't give a crap about the planet, or their kids, kind of family.

OP's mb, is that you?

That's not fair. The mb doesn't have a right to dictate very damn thing OP uses that the mb does not like. I agree with the healthy eating habits, but beyond that is not mb's business.

[Anonymous]

While OP's boss may be going about communicating her beliefs in a negative or controlling way, there is nothing wrong with her having and expressing them...isn't it a free country for her too? Bottom line, it's MB's home and she is completely within her rights to dictate what enters it. I don't use bleach products in my house, and were I to hire someone to clean it, they would not be allowed to bring them in...how is requesting a stainless steel water bottle or no junk food any different (perhaps pettier but still within reason). If you want a job where no one gives a s*** what you do, this isn't the right profession for you.

[Anonymous]

It is the parent's home, but my goodness, she is out of line to ask that every item she doesn't agree with OP does not use. That's completely ridiculous.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It is the parent's home, but my goodness, she is out of line to ask that every item she doesn't agree with OP does not use. That's completely ridiculous.

This. I think it's within line to ask a nanny not to eat food that the kids can't eat, or at least not in front of them. I think it's within line to work to hire someone who shares your views on food and the environment. I don't think it's within line to not mention those things up front and then try and dictate everything a nanny or other household employee does and uses.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:While OP's boss may be going about communicating her beliefs in a negative or controlling way, there is nothing wrong with her having and expressing them...isn't it a free country for her too? Bottom line, it's MB's home and she is completely within her rights to dictate what enters it. I don't use bleach products in my house, and were I to hire someone to clean it, they would not be allowed to bring them in...how is requesting a stainless steel water bottle or no junk food any different (perhaps pettier but still within reason). If you want a job where no one gives a s*** what you do, this isn't the right profession for you.

But you would probably tell them that before the job starts, right? And the products are part of the process of cleaning your home. Big difference dictating what OP can use to drink or what she puts on her face, etc.

OP is an adult, not some control freak's little bitch.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I was one of the MBs who responded to your original post defending your right to eat what you want, but suggesting that a good compromise to set a good example for the children might be for your MB to buy the food. But after reading this, I have to say that I am a whole lot less sympathetic and mighty glad you aren't my nanny. While I think if your MB was that concerned about foods/environment she should have used her interviews to find someone who shared those concerns, and she doesn't sound like a gem of a person to know or work for, you are also intractable. If you think the country is so free that you just get to do whatever you want, whenever and however while at work, I suggest you start your own business. And for everyone's sake, not a child care business.

I'm a nanny and I agree with this. OP sounds selfish and spoiled the the mentality that since it's a free country she can rape and pilage the environment and everyone else just has to live with it. Sadly there are far too many Americans with this piss poor attitude and it's no wonder we're failing as a nation. I stopped buying plastic 3 or more years ago...i use glass food storage containers, lunch bots and wax bags for lunches that won't need to be microwaved, and kleen kanteen bottles. It's so much better on so many levels. All I can say OP is stay in whatever midwestern cave you live in because you would not fit in anywhere else, and stay the eff away from the west coast. We don't need anymore trash.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I was one of the MBs who responded to your original post defending your right to eat what you want, but suggesting that a good compromise to set a good example for the children might be for your MB to buy the food. But after reading this, I have to say that I am a whole lot less sympathetic and mighty glad you aren't my nanny. While I think if your MB was that concerned about foods/environment she should have used her interviews to find someone who shared those concerns, and she doesn't sound like a gem of a person to know or work for, you are also intractable. If you think the country is so free that you just get to do whatever you want, whenever and however while at work, I suggest you start your own business. And for everyone's sake, not a child care business.

I'm a nanny and I agree with this. OP sounds selfish and spoiled the the mentality that since it's a free country she can rape and pilage the environment and everyone else just has to live with it. Sadly there are far too many Americans with this piss poor attitude and it's no wonder we're failing as a nation. I stopped buying plastic 3 or more years ago...i use glass food storage containers, lunch bots and wax bags for lunches that won't need to be microwaved, and kleen kanteen bottles. It's so much better on so many levels. All I can say OP is stay in whatever midwestern cave you live in because you would not fit in anywhere else, and stay the eff away from the west coast. We don't need anymore trash.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:While OP's boss may be going about communicating her beliefs in a negative or controlling way, there is nothing wrong with her having and expressing them...isn't it a free country for her too? Bottom line, it's MB's home and she is completely within her rights to dictate what enters it. I don't use bleach products in my house, and were I to hire someone to clean it, they would not be allowed to bring them in...how is requesting a stainless steel water bottle or no junk food any different (perhaps pettier but still within reason). If you want a job where no one gives a s*** what you do, this isn't the right profession for you.

But you would probably tell them that before the job starts, right? And the products are part of the process of cleaning your home. Big difference dictating what OP can use to drink or what she puts on her face, etc.

OP is an adult, not some control freak's little bitch.

How difficult is it to understand that nannying is a job that constantly changes. There seems to be this prevailing mentality that if something isn't IN THE CONTRACT (like those actually mean anything) then it can't be requested. Perhaps MB didn't feel like she had to include food stipulations because she reasonably expected that the woman she was hiring wouldn't need guidance in this area; once she realized that it was necessary, she brought up the issue-as was her prerogative to do so. If you can't adapt to changing needs and demands, this is not the career/job for you.