Not making it past trial period

[Anonymous]

OP, I am a Nanny & usually can see things more from a Nanny’s perspective however I have to admit that I feel you dropped the ball on this one.

Reason being is that for one, $27/Hr is a good rate for a three-yr. old.
And I do not find it unusual that this little boy’s Mother wanted you to take him to the park after breakfast.

Lots of kiddos (As both a parent as well as a Nanny!) will initially say that they do not want to go to the park….or basically anywhere!
However once they get there, they are usually happy but I am jumping along too quickly here….

Anyway if a parent requests that you take her child to the park after breakfast - then that is an entirely reasonable thing to ask.
Mornings are usually best (especially during the summer due to the heat) as it allows the child to play + exercise so hopefully his afternoon nap will be a good one since he should be tired out from playing at the park.

An afternoon jaunt to the park likely will not bode well for his schedule as it will be hotter by afternoon plus afternoons are typically when the child naps as this Mother said her child does.

And if the house temperature is set to 64 degrees & you are uncomfortable you should have texted/called the Mother and let her know or if she works outside the home > set the A/C temp yourself until she came home.
I highly doubt that she would have had an issue w/you doing this nor would any parents.

Keep these pointers in mind so that going forward you will have a clearer idea of what most parents will expect.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I recently did a trial shift with a new family and it became clear about 3 hours in the MB did not want to hire me.

It was for 1 boy, 3. She was paying $27/hr.

The little boy is allowed to watch cartoons while he finishes lunch. MB wanted him to go outside around 10am for a walk to the park. I kept asking the little boy if he was ready to go for a walk and he said no. She gave me his daily schedule at 9, and said at 10AM every day he goes for some kind of an outing before lunch. At noon, she came out of her office and asked me if I had taken him to the park and I said no, because he didn't want to. It was also freezing and 64 degrees in the house, so I was wrapped up in a blanket and sitting on the couch.

She said I need to let her know if there's issues at any point, if I'm too cold, then he's too cold. He was dressed in short and a t-shirt and she put warmer clothing on him right away, turned off his iPad and told me I need to take him outside. I said at that point it's clear this wouldn't work and I needed an MB who is a little flexible and understanding. I said there's nothing wrong with going after lunch, and she said I was right, but after lunch is normally quiet time or his nap if he will take one.

Did I do anything wrong here?

1. You were given a schedule, and you decided to deviate from it during a trial day. You did not ask, you just made an executive decision. That is not a nanny’s place to do during a trial day. Some nannies have the authority later to change the child(ren)’s schedule; you had no idea if this position would ever have that authority. At some point, you need to understand that parents have the right to decide for their children, and it’s not the nanny’s place (especially during a trial day) to override a parent.

2. Instead of telling the child that it was time to put the iPad away, you let him play on it for hours. Most kids will choose an iPad over any other activity. Nannies and parents know this. We don’t ask kids to do something else until the iPad is away.

3. You asked a toddler/preschooler if he was ready to go to the park. That question is too vague for a three year old. “We’re going to the park. We need to put our shoes on in the mudroom. Do you want to hop like a frog or crawl like a bear to the mudroom?” is specific, offers an easy choice, and limits the child’s ability to argue.

4. You felt that it was cold enough that you needed to wrap up on the couch for several hours in your employer’s blanket. You didn’t change the thermostat. You didn’t text or call the mother about the temperature. You didn’t check to see if the child was cold. Doing any of those three things would be better than just sitting there like a lump on a log.

5. When the mother checking in with you and you had not done what was asked, you argued instead of accepting constructive criticism. You were in the wrong, then you dug your heels in to try to be right. You came on here to try again to find evidence to show you that you were right.

Fwiw, I’m a 24/7 live-in nanny. My employer has been home less than 2 months since Christmas. I don’t change the schedule without talking to my employer first. I have authority to do a lot of things (due to our situation), but unless there’s an emergency, I talk to my employer every time.

[Anonymous]

Kids need to be outside at some point in the day and in the summer, 10am is far more reasonable than afternoon when it's hotter and the mosquitos are worse.