New nanny is pregnant, wwyd

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’d give one opportunity to be upfront and honest by mentioning the frequent absences. If she doesn’t tell you I would start looking for another nanny sooner rather than later to minimize the disruption to your child. You can then give her whatever severance she is entitled to.

And get a good lawyer, because firing someone for being pregnant is discrimination.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’d give one opportunity to be upfront and honest by mentioning the frequent absences. If she doesn’t tell you I would start looking for another nanny sooner rather than later to minimize the disruption to your child. You can then give her whatever severance she is entitled to.

And get a good lawyer, because firing someone for being pregnant is discrimination.

Yup, funny how most women would scream bloody murder if their employer did it to them. Right, OP?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’d give one opportunity to be upfront and honest by mentioning the frequent absences. If she doesn’t tell you I would start looking for another nanny sooner rather than later to minimize the disruption to your child. You can then give her whatever severance she is entitled to.

And get a good lawyer, because firing someone for being pregnant is discrimination.

You fire her for repeatedly taking off for family appointment and other things.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’d give one opportunity to be upfront and honest by mentioning the frequent absences. If she doesn’t tell you I would start looking for another nanny sooner rather than later to minimize the disruption to your child. You can then give her whatever severance she is entitled to.

And get a good lawyer, because firing someone for being pregnant is discrimination.

You fire her for repeatedly taking off for family appointment and other things.

When was the last time you got fired for being pregnant? Let’s be honest.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’d give one opportunity to be upfront and honest by mentioning the frequent absences. If she doesn’t tell you I would start looking for another nanny sooner rather than later to minimize the disruption to your child. You can then give her whatever severance she is entitled to.

And get a good lawyer, because firing someone for being pregnant is discrimination.

You fire her for repeatedly taking off for family appointment and other things.

When was the last time you got fired for being pregnant? Let’s be honest.

I got told by my boss that if I came back after my child they'd make my life difficult and set me up to be fired. I quit and took the emails to unemployment and got unemployment. It happens to lots of women. But, there is cause here if she's using too much leave/not scheduling it and causing her employer issues.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would wait for her to tell us, congratulate her, and ask for a sit down meeting where she lets us know her vision for leave and a possible return to work and we do the same.

I'd do this, except that before I talked to her I'd also start looking for her temporary or permanent replacement. At least where I live, it's really tough to find nannies and it can take a few months.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’d give one opportunity to be upfront and honest by mentioning the frequent absences. If she doesn’t tell you I would start looking for another nanny sooner rather than later to minimize the disruption to your child. You can then give her whatever severance she is entitled to.

And get a good lawyer, because firing someone for being pregnant is discrimination.

Except you’re firing someone for repeated absences and being unavailable for long term employment. You don’t get to sue your employer because they won’t put their child through separation for you. That’s what severance is for.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’d give one opportunity to be upfront and honest by mentioning the frequent absences. If she doesn’t tell you I would start looking for another nanny sooner rather than later to minimize the disruption to your child. You can then give her whatever severance she is entitled to.

And get a good lawyer, because firing someone for being pregnant is discrimination.

Except you’re firing someone for repeated absences and being unavailable for long term employment. You don’t get to sue your employer because they won’t put their child through separation for you. That’s what severance is for.

And if you give her severance through the end of 12 weeks of maternity leave, that might be reasonable.

The idea that preventing your child from experiencing changes in nannies is a reasonable excuse to violate a woman's civil rights and take her away her ability to feed her family is horrifying. If you really think that your child not experiencing any changes in care giver is more important than having bread on someone's table, then you need to quit and be a SAHP.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’d give one opportunity to be upfront and honest by mentioning the frequent absences. If she doesn’t tell you I would start looking for another nanny sooner rather than later to minimize the disruption to your child. You can then give her whatever severance she is entitled to.

And get a good lawyer, because firing someone for being pregnant is discrimination.

Except you’re firing someone for repeated absences and being unavailable for long term employment. You don’t get to sue your employer because they won’t put their child through separation for you. That’s what severance is for.

And if you give her severance through the end of 12 weeks of maternity leave, that might be reasonable.

The idea that preventing your child from experiencing changes in nannies is a reasonable excuse to violate a woman's civil rights and take her away her ability to feed her family is horrifying. If you really think that your child not experiencing any changes in care giver is more important than having bread on someone's table, then you need to quit and be a SAHP.

There is no civil right to a job you aren't able to do.

Every job comes with a benefit package. Some include maternity leave and some don't.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’d give one opportunity to be upfront and honest by mentioning the frequent absences. If she doesn’t tell you I would start looking for another nanny sooner rather than later to minimize the disruption to your child. You can then give her whatever severance she is entitled to.

And get a good lawyer, because firing someone for being pregnant is discrimination.

Except you’re firing someone for repeated absences and being unavailable for long term employment. You don’t get to sue your employer because they won’t put their child through separation for you. That’s what severance is for.

And if you give her severance through the end of 12 weeks of maternity leave, that might be reasonable.

The idea that preventing your child from experiencing changes in nannies is a reasonable excuse to violate a woman's civil rights and take her away her ability to feed her family is horrifying. If you really think that your child not experiencing any changes in care giver is more important than having bread on someone's table, then you need to quit and be a SAHP.

There is no civil right to a job you aren't able to do.

Every job comes with a benefit package. Some include maternity leave and some don't.

There is no evidence that the nanny isn't currently able to do her job. She has taken some leave. That's not the same thing.

OP isn't looking to fire her because she look leave, she is using her taking leave as an excuse to fire her for being pregnant and potentially leaving in 6 months. That's sex discrimination. It's a civil rights issue. Firing someone for getting pregnant, knowing that it will force them to job hunt while visibly pregnant and endanger their financial security is unethical.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’d give one opportunity to be upfront and honest by mentioning the frequent absences. If she doesn’t tell you I would start looking for another nanny sooner rather than later to minimize the disruption to your child. You can then give her whatever severance she is entitled to.

And get a good lawyer, because firing someone for being pregnant is discrimination.

Except you’re firing someone for repeated absences and being unavailable for long term employment. You don’t get to sue your employer because they won’t put their child through separation for you. That’s what severance is for.

And if you give her severance through the end of 12 weeks of maternity leave, that might be reasonable.

The idea that preventing your child from experiencing changes in nannies is a reasonable excuse to violate a woman's civil rights and take her away her ability to feed her family is horrifying. If you really think that your child not experiencing any changes in care giver is more important than having bread on someone's table, then you need to quit and be a SAHP.

There is no civil right to a job you aren't able to do.

Every job comes with a benefit package. Some include maternity leave and some don't.

There is no evidence that the nanny isn't currently able to do her job. She has taken some leave. That's not the same thing.

OP isn't looking to fire her because she look leave, she is using her taking leave as an excuse to fire her for being pregnant and potentially leaving in 6 months. That's sex discrimination. It's a civil rights issue. Firing someone for getting pregnant, knowing that it will force them to job hunt while visibly pregnant and endanger their financial security is unethical.

Committing to do a job for a year and then lying is unethical. The nanny doesn’t qualify for maternity leave given she will not have worked for a year. She probably doesn’t even qualify for severance. Absenteeism is grounds for firing, as is lying. I would not trust someone to be honest with me about the care of my child who was routinely lying to my face about not showing up for work.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Our new nanny committed to a year with our family but didn’t tell us she was pregnant. But we figured out that she is due to her phone calls discussing it in our presence, and it sounds like she’s high risk with a history of preterm birth. As far as we can tell she got pregnant just after we hired her. I think she is in the second tri early, but she hasn’t told us yet. I’m not sure how to handle this, and am a little upset since she committed to a year and clearly that is not going to happen, and she’s not coming out and telling us (but has made up lots of doctors appointments for family members). She won’t qualify for leave and I don’t think she will want to return after, the baby comes. We finally have gotten into a routine with her and it’s frustrating that will be upended in just a few more months....

Um, since when is it advisable for a woman to tell her employer so early about her pregnancy???

If she speaks on the phone in front of them she's already told them

+1. I’d let her go now with severance, telling her that her frequent family appointments are too difficult for you to work around in your job. Don’t bring up her pregnancy.

[Anonymous]

The fact that she is taking the calls in front of you would indicate she wants you to know but doesn’t want to initiate the discussion. Maybe she took the job hoping to get severance/unemployment.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:"We've overheard you talking on calls in our presence and it sounds like you're pregnant and high risk." Then just stare at her. It'll be her turn to talk.

Might as well put up an ad now for a new nanny. She probably didn't want to tell you until after the new year in the hopes she gets a Christmas bonus.

You are eavesdropping and I would tell you that it is none of your effing business. If your boss can't ask you, then you also cannot ask.

Nanny doesn’t mind if she is discussing personal details in front of them in their home. She could easily tell the caller that she will call them back later.

[Anonymous]

DP -- setting aside all the ethical and emotional issues, is a domestic employer in VA with one employee subject to any "discrimination" laws vis a vis a pregnant nanny? If you have a cite, please provide.