How would you address this

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We are in a nanny share. We are the hosts. Our nanny regularly takes the babies out and about. I work from home so I know when they are around or not. This morning our share partner took her child to the doctor so she wasn't dropped off at the regular time. My nanny took my child out after breakfast. I didn't think much of it because she regularly takes him to playdates, the library etc. My share partner contacted me asking whether our nanny was back yet. I am guessing that our nanny told her she was taking my son out. My nanny share partner needed to get to work and drop off her child.

Our nanny was unresponsive to our texts and phone calls for over an hour. I just heard from her and she is on her way home. How should I/we address the unresponsiveness? She has a phone. This is the first time anything like this has happened. Generally, she is a very good nanny.

Should we just discuss checking her phone more regularly? I am pretty disturbed that neither I nor my nanny share partner could get a hold of her.

TIA

I have so many questions.
-Did the share partner tell nanny they had a doctor appointment?
-Did the share partner tell nanny the approximate start and end time for the appointment?
-Did the share partner tell nanny they would be bringing the baby to her after the appointment?

Nanny should have answered your texts and calls earlier, but I think your share partner needs to communicate better as well. If nanny knew the answer to all three of my questions, she would have been home at the appropriate time.

[Anonymous]

First, I would ascertain that the other mother ACTUALLY told nanny approximate time she was bringing child and the proof would have to be in text or email. Your nanny sounds as though she is smart and competent and I doubt very seriously that the other mother gave her a time.

If you attack nanny, you are going to create a huge problem and she may, justifiably, find another job

[Anonymous]

OP PLEASE COME BACK!

[Anonymous]

OP here.

To answer your questions. The share partner did tell her that she had a doctor appointment. She also told her that she would call/text when they were done with the appointment. I wasn't involved in any of that exchange until the other mom texted me.

Here is what happened and I think our nanny used a bit of poor judgement here. She took my son downtown to one of the museums. She takes the kids out regularly and she usually tells me where they are going if they are going downtown. If they are going to a play date, the library or someplace else close she doesn't usually tell me. I trust her to be doing appropriate activities with my son and the other little girl. She didn't say anything to me that morning about going downtown. When they left I was upstairs working and didn't think much about it. They leave for a couple of hours in the morning and come home for lunch/nap. Anyway, they were on their way back from the museums and apparently my nanny's phone doesn't work well underground.

I discussed what we should do with the nanny share partner. We just talked to her. Our contract has a clause in it that she has to be available by cell phone and we just talked to her about that. We did emphasize that we are happy with her and trust her but it was frustrating for her to be out of touch especially when she knew that the nanny partner would be calling/texting her.

[Anonymous]

In other words you feel the nanny used poor judgement because her phone doesn't work on the Metro? Where do you live that would be an hours Metro trip from downtown? Again this is poor communication on everyone's part. It also sounds like the other mom didn't actually know when they would return. Did you expect the nanny to suspend her normal activities with your child and just wait around for the other mom to text or call? All I'm saying is keep this kind of stuff up and your nanny will quit to work for more reasonable people.

[Anonymous]

OP here. No, the nanny used poor judgement taking my son all the way downtown knowing that whenever the doctor appointment was over that the other mom would be dropping off the baby. She could have easily taken my son to the library, the zoo, the playground, or on a playdate, which are all very near our house and she could have gotten back quickly and easily. I had only been trying to get a hold of my nanny for about a half hour but my share partner said that she had been trying for about 45 minutes before that.

[Anonymous]

In your original post you stated “OUR nanny did not respond to OUR calls and texts for over an hour”. Are you walking that back now? Did your share partner give the nanny a time frame? Ask the nanny not the share partner. Again it sounds like some communication issues on everybody’s part and to give your nanny a hard time about this is unreasonable.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. No, the nanny used poor judgement taking my son all the way downtown knowing that whenever the doctor appointment was over that the other mom would be dropping off the baby. She could have easily taken my son to the library, the zoo, the playground, or on a playdate, which are all very near our house and she could have gotten back quickly and easily. I had only been trying to get a hold of my nanny for about a half hour but my share partner said that she had been trying for about 45 minutes before that.

And if they had had a group scheduled to meet downtown, and they were hosting? Or this was the first meeting with a potential play date partner? Or some other valid reason? You don’t change plans in a share for this situation, the child is brought to nanny or the parent waits with the child, knowing it won’t be too long until they return.