Bathing 11-year-old NK

[Anonymous]

Seems like nanny should be able to teach her to bath herself with all her clothes on. Just show her the method for each body part, fully clothed.
If she needs help turning on the shower, then work on that separately fully clothed.

[Anonymous]

Why is everyone so hung up on nudity? Modesty comes naturally and the body of an 11 year that you are in charge of caring for should not register as sexual in any way! Just teach her! Show her how to turn on the water and how to adjust it. Let her get undressed and get in, then sit in the bathroom and guide her. Help her if she needs it. I wasn't adult all modest around my mother or aunt at 11 and well beyond. Hell, still not. And I'm sure I would have felt similar with a female caretaker. Think of yourself as a nurse if that helps you mentally get over a child's nudity. And yes, she should know how to bathe herself, but she doesn't, so teach her and help her where necessary.

[Anonymous]

Just tell her.

Take a shower. If she asks how. Tell her it's like washing her hands but with her whole body.

Done.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Why is everyone so hung up on nudity? Modesty comes naturally and the body of an 11 year that you are in charge of caring for should not register as sexual in any way! Just teach her! Show her how to turn on the water and how to adjust it. Let her get undressed and get in, then sit in the bathroom and guide her. Help her if she needs it. I wasn't adult all modest around my mother or aunt at 11 and well beyond. Hell, still not. And I'm sure I would have felt similar with a female caretaker. Think of yourself as a nurse if that helps you mentally get over a child's nudity. And yes, she should know how to bathe herself, but she doesn't, so teach her and help her where necessary.

No, it is inappropriate for a new nanny to bathe or teach to bathe and eleven year old. Has nothing to do with nudity but everything to do with what is appropriate for a girl of that age. And the nanny is not a nurse here to administer a bath to someone ill or injured. I guarantee you a nurse would not be bathing a healthy, normal 11 year old in any circumstance.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Why is everyone so hung up on nudity? Modesty comes naturally and the body of an 11 year that you are in charge of caring for should not register as sexual in any way! Just teach her! Show her how to turn on the water and how to adjust it. Let her get undressed and get in, then sit in the bathroom and guide her. Help her if she needs it. I wasn't adult all modest around my mother or aunt at 11 and well beyond. Hell, still not. And I'm sure I would have felt similar with a female caretaker. Think of yourself as a nurse if that helps you mentally get over a child's nudity. And yes, she should know how to bathe herself, but she doesn't, so teach her and help her where necessary.

I wasn’t modest until 11 or 12 with family members.

[Anonymous]

Having an adult bathe you and walking around nude are two very, very different things, People! One involves touching.

No, it is not okay for a new nanny to be asked to bathe an 11 year old. She should ABSOLUTELY be doing this herself by now - even hair washing.

[Anonymous]

I find this very strange. My daughters (and sons) were bathing themselves and washing their own hair by the time they were four at the latest. This mother needs to back off, and let her child gain some independence.

[Anonymous]

The gir really hates bathing and basic hygiene in general but has obviously started puberty and needs be be bathin daily. So we’ve only done bath twice, and both times I had a brief talk about bathing independently and how I could help if she needed me but I was going to give her privacy.

There are a lot of hygiene issues that a girl of her age should have locked down. (She cannot wipe properly, she doesn’t clean her face after and often had crumbs/food all over herself, won’t brush hair or teeth).

This is an intelligent, capable child. She is just very lazy because Mom has babied her to a degree I have NEVER seen.

She is super sweet but expects everything handed to her and I’m not going to be an enabler.

MB is a very busy lawyer so I don’t know if she just never wanted to put on the effort or what. Going to have a sit down about getting NK to have some self care skills. She will be starting menstruation soon, and she 100% needs to be dealing with that herself.

[Anonymous]

The gir really hates bathing and basic hygiene in general but has obviously started puberty and needs be be bathin daily. So we’ve only done bath twice, and both times I had a brief talk about bathing independently and how I could help if she needed me but I was going to give her privacy.

There are a lot of hygiene issues that a girl of her age should have locked down. (She cannot wipe properly, she doesn’t clean her face after and often had crumbs/food all over herself, won’t brush hair or teeth).

This is an intelligent, capable child. She is just very lazy because Mom has babied her to a degree I have NEVER seen.

She is super sweet but expects everything handed to her and I’m not going to be an enabler.

MB is a very busy lawyer so I don’t know if she just never wanted to put on the effort or what. Going to have a sit down about getting NK to have some self care skills. She will be starting menstruation soon, and she 100% needs to be dealing with that herself.

So who deals with all the dependency on the weekend? the busy attorney mom? Agree you will be doing this young girl a huge favor by helping her toward independence. The lack of hygiene can't help her with socialization with her peers.

[Anonymous]

i would quit. this is a huge red flag. this family is clearly crazy.

[Anonymous]

Yikes. There is clearly something quite wrong in this family. Neurotypical 11-year-olds don't act like this about basic hygiene. Perhaps it is a way to demand parental attention?

I would walk away from the job before you're put in other uncomfortable situations.

[Anonymous]

Very strange

[Anonymous]

Are you sure she’s neurotypical? This is so bizarre. She sounds more like a 4-5 year old than 11!

[Anonymous]

No excuse... that is a No No unless the child has a physical disability that is certified by her pediatrician.
Just make simple and tell the child that u are Not goin to be with her in the bath and that she need anything u will be near by.