Nanny upset she didn't get a snow day

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I screened pretty heavily for the WAH bias. I promised to give them autonomy, and in return, I expected to be left to my work. It's important to find a good match.

How did you screen for this?? I would love to know. I asked questions about this during the interview, but it's one thing to answer questions in a vacuum and another to be in that situation.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Why do not already have your Nanny's address? That seems weird that you wouldn't get it when you hired her. You are her employer, you need it.

She uses the address of family members as her permanent legal address, which makes sense to me as she's moved a couple times in the past year and doesn't want mail to get misdirected. I did get her residential address when I hired her, but she moved a couple months ago to something temporary and no, I haven't bothered to get this new address.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I screened pretty heavily for the WAH bias. I promised to give them autonomy, and in return, I expected to be left to my work. It's important to find a good match.

How did you screen for this?? I would love to know. I asked questions about this during the interview, but it's one thing to answer questions in a vacuum and another to be in that situation.

I talked about how some people aren't interested, and that I understood. I was also 100% honest about how present I would be during the day, and how I wanted the relationship to go. I do pop in and out sometimes, for example, and I don't hide in my office all day. I looked for someone who saw that as more of a natural thing than as an oddity or imposition, and someone who liked the idea of having another adult around.

This has also been the routine for my kids since birth, so they all handle the "popping" in and out just fine. If they didn't I'd reevaluate.

I made a bad choice once, when I had to hire in a hurry. That nanny started being rude (and weird -- she ran out of the house with my naked baby to take her for a walk because she didn't like being home when I was). That was a short-term temp position, or I would have cut my losses. I'm not willing to be uncomfortable in my own home.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I screened pretty heavily for the WAH bias. I promised to give them autonomy, and in return, I expected to be left to my work. It's important to find a good match.

How did you screen for this?? I would love to know. I asked questions about this during the interview, but it's one thing to answer questions in a vacuum and another to be in that situation.

I talked about how some people aren't interested, and that I understood. I was also 100% honest about how present I would be during the day, and how I wanted the relationship to go. I do pop in and out sometimes, for example, and I don't hide in my office all day. I looked for someone who saw that as more of a natural thing than as an oddity or imposition, and someone who liked the idea of having another adult around.

This has also been the routine for my kids since birth, so they all handle the "popping" in and out just fine. If they didn't I'd reevaluate.

I made a bad choice once, when I had to hire in a hurry. That nanny started being rude (and weird -- she ran out of the house with my naked baby to take her for a walk because she didn't like being home when I was). That was a short-term temp position, or I would have cut my losses. I'm not willing to be uncomfortable in my own home.

Let's be clear here, I am working with WAHM rightnow. Not matter how nice or good the MB is this situation doesn't work. Since this is my first time working with WAHM but never in my life I will ever accept a job like these. It's stressful, annoying and frustrating and kids have double tantrum when they knew the mom is home.
It might worked for some but definitely not for me. Lesson learned.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I screened pretty heavily for the WAH bias. I promised to give them autonomy, and in return, I expected to be left to my work. It's important to find a good match.

How did you screen for this?? I would love to know. I asked questions about this during the interview, but it's one thing to answer questions in a vacuum and another to be in that situation.

I talked about how some people aren't interested, and that I understood. I was also 100% honest about how present I would be during the day, and how I wanted the relationship to go. I do pop in and out sometimes, for example, and I don't hide in my office all day. I looked for someone who saw that as more of a natural thing than as an oddity or imposition, and someone who liked the idea of having another adult around.

This has also been the routine for my kids since birth, so they all handle the "popping" in and out just fine. If they didn't I'd reevaluate.

I made a bad choice once, when I had to hire in a hurry. That nanny started being rude (and weird -- she ran out of the house with my naked baby to take her for a walk because she didn't like being home when I was). That was a short-term temp position, or I would have cut my losses. I'm not willing to be uncomfortable in my own home.

Let's be clear here, I am working with WAHM rightnow. Not matter how nice or good the MB is this situation doesn't work. Since this is my first time working with WAHM but never in my life I will ever accept a job like these. It's stressful, annoying and frustrating and kids have double tantrum when they knew the mom is home.
It might worked for some but definitely not for me. Lesson learned.

I probably wouldn't have hired you (I'm the one who does the screening). I look for nannies who don't mind the disruptions, or who have worked at day cares and are just used to things changing whenever. If you told me you had never worked for a WAH family, but that it was fine with you, that wouldn't have indicated enough interest for me. I also pay well, so it's worth her while to work with me. That's fine -- every family has its match.

[Anonymous]

Conditions in NY may have been different but the snow wasn't the issue, it was the ice from the rain after the snow fall freezing over. In DC things shut down for the most part.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Conditions in NY may have been different but the snow wasn't the issue, it was the ice from the rain after the snow fall freezing over. In DC things shut down for the most part.

Interesting point of view. Live-in nanny here. I worked (of course), DB has gone in every day this week, MB wah Tuesday and Wednesday, kids still did every single extra-curricular activity, regardless of whether school was cancelled or delayed. I'm from a snowy area of the country, as are both MB and DB, we all know how to drive in snow, ice and slush. For us, the worry was idiots on the road with no relevant experience.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It also sounds like she didn't want to give you her address for some reason. I don't think that's necessarily a bad thing (maybe she was staying at someone's house, maybe she values her privacy a lot, who knows), but that was how I read the situation.

Maybe she's homeless. You should pay her more so she can get snow boots.

[Anonymous]

My nanny had to wait half hour in the cold for her bus to arrive, then her shoes got completely wet when she was walking to our home. She actually has winter boots, but her mother borrowed them, since they live together and she had to go to work as well. I felt so terrible, I wouldn't had ask her to come if I knew that. At the end of the day I paid for her Uber so she wouldn't have to have a horrible commute again.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Conditions in NY may have been different but the snow wasn't the issue, it was the ice from the rain after the snow fall freezing over. In DC things shut down for the most part.

Interesting point of view. Live-in nanny here. I worked (of course), DB has gone in every day this week, MB wah Tuesday and Wednesday, kids still did every single extra-curricular activity, regardless of whether school was cancelled or delayed. I'm from a snowy area of the country, as are both MB and DB, we all know how to drive in snow, ice and slush. For us, the worry was idiots on the road with no relevant experience.

My husband could not make it to work with the slick roads. Many off the beltway were not passable in the morning. He tried and had to turn around. We have an AWD car. Many roads were not plowed and it was very icy. There is a difference between snow and ice. Snow you can drive on. Ice is far more difficult without the right vehicle. Many people around here do not have cars to handle it as it rarely snows. This was our first snow of the year (maybe we had one small one). Our activities got canceled. Its not worth the safety risk.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It also sounds like she didn't want to give you her address for some reason. I don't think that's necessarily a bad thing (maybe she was staying at someone's house, maybe she values her privacy a lot, who knows), but that was how I read the situation.

Maybe she's homeless. You should pay her more so she can get snow boots.

She may be if she is moving that much.

[Anonymous]

I only hire people with reliable transportation to get to work (I provide a nanny car at work). Might be different if I lived in NYC, but I don't.

I had a great candidate in DC area who was planning to ride her bike. I had zero confidence that she could get to work in the rain, cold, snow, or in the dark in the winter. Maybe that's not fair, but I'm not willing to judge "unsafe conditions" based on bicycling or walking. Because you're right; for days after a snowstorm when the roads are clear, sidewalks and bus stops can be a mess.

[Anonymous]

Why is an Uber safer than other cars?
If the roads are bad I wouldnt want to get in a car with a stranger, not knowing how they drive in the snow.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I screened pretty heavily for the WAH bias. I promised to give them autonomy, and in return, I expected to be left to my work. It's important to find a good match.

How did you screen for this?? I would love to know. I asked questions about this during the interview, but it's one thing to answer questions in a vacuum and another to be in that situation.

I talked about how some people aren't interested, and that I understood. I was also 100% honest about how present I would be during the day, and how I wanted the relationship to go. I do pop in and out sometimes, for example, and I don't hide in my office all day. I looked for someone who saw that as more of a natural thing than as an oddity or imposition, and someone who liked the idea of having another adult around.

This has also been the routine for my kids since birth, so they all handle the "popping" in and out just fine. If they didn't I'd reevaluate.

I made a bad choice once, when I had to hire in a hurry. That nanny started being rude (and weird -- she ran out of the house with my naked baby to take her for a walk because she didn't like being home when I was). That was a short-term temp position, or I would have cut my losses. I'm not willing to be uncomfortable in my own home.

OP here. Thanks for responding!

[Anonymous]

OP again. Recent PPs are talking about safety of transportation on a snow day though perhaps as a tangent and not in direct response to my post. Just to reiterate, our nanny had an underground subway commute, which the Mayor deemed safe enough not to shut down (he shut down above-ground transportation). She actually lives < 5 miles from us on local roads (no highway) so either way, car or subway, I felt the commute was safe enough to ask her to come in. I also found out after the fact that her walk to the subway is 0.1 mile...