Creepy Grandpa

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:No, this is not all right.
This is part of the f'd up patriarchal society that we live in.
That so many women are willing to tolerate inappropriate comments from an older man in position of power (employer vs employee).

Tell him curtly and sternly to "Cut it out John".
If he persists, document word for word his comments, and tell your boss that it is highly inappropriate, and you wish him not to come over anymore while you are on duty.

All women must stand up for ourselves and each other to finally change these attitudes and prevent them from being passed down from generation to generation.

- WOHM MB

Fine, and you are free to feel like it's as big of a deal as rape of beating your wife, but it's not. It's male humor. If women continue to demonize men, when we have real threats against us no one will take us serious when real aggressive sexism actually exists.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No, this is not all right.
This is part of the f'd up patriarchal society that we live in.
That so many women are willing to tolerate inappropriate comments from an older man in position of power (employer vs employee).

Tell him curtly and sternly to "Cut it out John".
If he persists, document word for word his comments, and tell your boss that it is highly inappropriate, and you wish him not to come over anymore while you are on duty.

All women must stand up for ourselves and each other to finally change these attitudes and prevent them from being passed down from generation to generation.

- WOHM MB

Fine, and you are free to feel like it's as big of a deal as rape of beating your wife, but it's not. It's male humor. If women continue to demonize men, when we have real threats against us no one will take us serious when real aggressive sexism actually exists.

You need to check yourself. No one said rape or beating your wife or demonizing men. We're talking about 1 old perverted man who is acting inappropriately with the employee. He is in the position of power. It is wrong and not humorous in the least bit, and if you are a woman who thinks it is fine and thinks it would be fine if a man talked to your daughter like that someday, you are messed up.
You need to reframe your thinking. Not calling out poor behavior, because rape is much more serious is flawed thinking.

[Anonymous]

I would absolutely not be ok with anyone but the parents walking in unannounced. Even the parents let me know if they're showing up unexpectedly.

Do the parents have him letting himself in whenever?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would absolutely not be ok with anyone but the parents walking in unannounced. Even the parents let me know if they're showing up unexpectedly.

Do the parents have him letting himself in whenever?

He'll knock, but if I don't answer in a couple seconds he'll just unlock the door and come inside. Thankfully he hasn't been here the last two days!

[Anonymous]

NOT A GENERATIONAL THING! Do you think all 60+ yrs old men are creepy perverts? OP, you should not put up with this EVER. Tell the daughter you do not want him there with you. I'm sure she knows how he is or has been a victim of this behavior from him. The parents are liable for sexual harassment that happens to their employees and should also be concerned for him being around their kids. The comment about the "tap" is sickening and no one needs to tolerate that.

[Anonymous]

Also, record him with your cell phone. That is NOT normal behavior and when he progresses, he'll just say you never complained.

[Anonymous]

I would try to be friendly and change the subject away from the inappropriate topics. See if he gets the point. Sometimes subtle is good.

Does he enjoy the gkids?

[Anonymous]

I disagree. These comments are not appropriate and there is no excuse for them. Also, I would worry about the kids. How old are the kids and are they ever alone with the grandfather? It is important to go with your gut. Many times, our intuition is correct. Make sure you pay attention to the behavior of the kids if they are ever alone with the grandfather. A child is more likely to be sexually abused by someone they love than by a stranger. And, some of the signs can be easy to overlook. Obviously, you should not jump to conclusions. But, you should be cautious and observant of the behavior of the children. There are lots of online resources on this topic.

Anonymous wrote:It's a generational thing. You're not going to fix it. Just relax and flip him shit right back. He's just trying to joke around (albeit inappropriately.) Maybe talk to your MB about it...ask her how she handles him or if it would be over the line if you say something a little sassy back like calling him a dirty old man or something like that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would try to be friendly and change the subject away from the inappropriate topics. See if he gets the point. Sometimes subtle is good.

Does he enjoy the gkids?

Are you typically so stupid?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:MB father lives several blocks away and visits us unannounced 2-3 times a week. He makes me feel uncomfortable. He's yet to be outright lewd but he will make comments almost every time he visits that I consider inappropriate.

For example, the most alarming comment I've gotten was when I was bottle feeding the baby breastmilk and he said "I'm sure he'd just prefer that milk straight from the tap. Poor kid is probably confused, it's right in front of him and he can't even have it."

I awkwardly laugh and say nothing, it makes me so uncomfortable.

Otherwise he'll say to B4 something along the lines of, "Oh, you can't take advantage of [me] just because she's a pretty girl."

Often he'll make comments about me "going wild" when I'm off work. Just joking around either at my expense or in a way that's not really appropriate for a 64-year-old man to do to a twenty-something when she's alone taking care of his grandkids.

I obviously can't just tell MB her dad creeps me out. But I totally dread seeing him. Thankfully he only spends 15-20 minutes tops but it still makes me feel trapped.

.





Just ignore him,15 minutes going fast...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I disagree. These comments are not appropriate and there is no excuse for them. Also, I would worry about the kids. How old are the kids and are they ever alone with the grandfather? It is important to go with your gut. Many times, our intuition is correct. Make sure you pay attention to the behavior of the kids if they are ever alone with the grandfather. A child is more likely to be sexually abused by someone they love than by a stranger. And, some of the signs can be easy to overlook. Obviously, you should not jump to conclusions. But, you should be cautious and observant of the behavior of the children. There are lots of online resources on this topic.

Anonymous wrote:It's a generational thing. You're not going to fix it. Just relax and flip him shit right back. He's just trying to joke around (albeit inappropriately.) Maybe talk to your MB about it...ask her how she handles him or if it would be over the line if you say something a little sassy back like calling him a dirty old man or something like that.

Sometimes a dirty old man is just a dirty old man. That doesn't make him a molester. That said, if you're not adult enough to handle the situation yourself, then talk to your MB and ask her to reign him in for you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would try to be friendly and change the subject away from the inappropriate topics. See if he gets the point. Sometimes subtle is good.

Does he enjoy the gkids?

Are you typically so stupid?

Wow, that's nice. Listen you witch, you won't get too far in life if you always jump to the worst conclusion and act as mean as possible.

All I am saying is make sure this creepy grandpa knows that she knows he is being inappropriate and it is not welcome.

Maybe that maneuvering is too subtle for you.

[Anonymous]

Google Dr. Larry Nassar and see how easy it is to kindly reign filthy old men in.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Google Dr. Larry Nassar and see how easy it is to kindly reign filthy old men in.

Exactly.