New nanny - Money drama

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm going to be the voice of dissent here. This is a job. The money talk is completely appropriate. Her former employer said she was not shy asking for raises and benefits. She didn't bully or pout when denied. She simply asked. Isn't that what we are all told we should be doing more of as women? I say kudos to her.

She and your current nanny are friends. She gave her pertinent information and advice. Your nanny *has* been taken advantage of by you if she's been with you for years and never got a raise. Someone *should* tell her to stand up for herself. And no way should former nanny be paying new nanny during shadowing. YOU should be.

Your new nanny sounds like a great nanny (she came highly recommended by your nanny and a former employer, and you liked her). Do not hold against her the fact that she also takes herself seriously as a professional and expects to be well compensated as well. We're this any other industry, no one would fault her.

Um, no. She reported agreements to the current nanny that do not exist (yet, if at all). She kept asking for raises, extra money, bonuses, throughout the year. The fact that BOTH the reference emphasized this problem AND the old nanny reports that she is bragging about compensation she has not been given suggests that this is not your regular "advocate for yourself"-type relationship to money.

The OP can choose to ignore this, but I could not deal with it.

The reference still recommended her, and OP has only gotten one side of the alleged conversation. Doesn't this woman deserve a chance to defend herself? Maybe current nanny misunderstood, or is angry she never thought to ask for such things. I just think it's a bit crazy to act like someone, particularly a woman, is a money grubber for having the audacity to ask for what she wants. Who knows how many times she asked. Some people are put off by the asking at all, and its not fair. Only OP knows the specifics of the "asks" and i think she should give the potential nanny a chance to explain before writing her off because of complaints from an angry nanny.

New nanny brought up something with current nanny that OP has not discussed with her yet. She announced that she was getting benefit OP hsn't even discussed with her. She hasn't even approached OP about it yet.

Also, as a MB, the only time I have EVER highlighted a concern I had about a nanny (vs. maybe faint praise like "fine" instead of "great" or "fabulous" at something) was when the issue was a real problem and I could not, in good conscience, let another family hire her without forewarning that they would need to address it. So yes, I would take the reference's concerns very seriously.

[Anonymous]

Nanny here.
If I understand your post correctly, it sounds like the potential new nanny is telling lies to the current nanny. Right?
If the potential new nanny is telling lies, then she is not a trustworthy person. Being trustworthy is really really important if you are a nanny. This person is in your home, looking after small children, and seeing all the shiny stuff you own. There is no way in heck I would hire this person. She has shown she lacks integrity and is not trustworthy before you even hired her.